Zephyrhills High School - Zephilsco Yearbook (Zephyrhills, FL)

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PROPHECY Come with us, the Senior Class of 1960, as we journey around the world - and even beyond - to see what the future holds for our incomparable classmates. Relax in the luxury of an ultra-modern jet airliner as we taxi down the run-way and take off from Zcphyrhills Airport. First we cross the Atlantic to Ireland, the Emerald Isle, where Clayton Stokes is a national hero. By accident, Clayton discovered 1001 new uses for the Irish potato; his book Dig The Spud, Bud is a non-fiction best-seller. You see he wasn't called Tater for nothing. Now to the continent: Madrid, Spain, on the day of a bullfight - and what a celebration! Lady mat- ador, Donna Campbell is being hailed with showers of roses and shouts of Ole! . Donna is too kind- hearted to kill the bulls; she merely stuns them with a whiff of her favorite scent, Petrifying . In Paris, the fashion center of the world, Richard Riesen is the proprietor of Richards Chapeau Shoppie. The advertising slogan which made his elaborate bonnets famous is: My feather hats will tickle your fancy. Rome, Italy, was just a city of ancient ruins until Larry Legs Benjamin, formerly the star of the Bulldog Cagers, came to town to play pro basketball in the Colosseum. A capacity crowd saw Larry defeat the Harlem Globetrotters single-handed. Atop an Alpine peak there stands a familiar figure in a mountain climber's costume. Those legs - I saw them in the 1960 Zephilsco. It must be Gary Crist! He married a charming Swiss lass, and is at the moment practicing his newest talent - - Yodelinq! Barbara Adams now lives with her husband in his native country of Germany. There she is teaching her German-born children to say some very important American words, such as: Hey, man, that's real gone! and Like Wow! and You've got rocks in your head! , so they can converse with her American Friends. Our stewardessess on this flight around the world are Lynn Nichols and Edelma Sergey. In her spare time, Lynn is teaching Mrs. Kaylor's English Class, while Mrs. Kaylor is in Stratford-on-Avon in England gathering information for a thesis on The Mole on Shakespeare's Left Elbow . After working hours, Edelma sells souvenirs of Florida in Siberia. She is raking in money to be a lady miser. While flying over the Dark Continent, we see a pleasant scene deep in the African jungle. Dedi Anderson has fulfilled her ambition to teach elementary Spanish to little ones. After graduating from Lady Knobhill's Finishing School, she is teaching the uses of the subjunctive to Pygmies. On to the top of the world - Tibet - where Rae Foster is now a registered nurse. She graduated from the University of Northern Tibet's School of Nursing. (Chemistry is not a required subject in Tibet.) In Moscow we find businesswoman Elaine McKendree managing the Russian branch of Zephyr Brand Dried Fruits, situated directly across from the Kremlin. Confucius say, We now nearing Hong Kong. Old classmate Janice Houck changee last name and she and husband run rickshaw service. Their coolies are the coolest. Now we fly down under to see the girl we knew as Judy Oliver. She and her husband haven't made a fortune on their kangaroo ranch in Australia, but they always manage to stay a couple jumps ahead of their creditors. Patty Sante and Jerry Peters liked their Hawaiian honeymoon so well that they are now living in a vine-covered beach hut on Waikiki Beach. Jerry commutes to the mainland and works hard in his dad's office, trying to support a large family and a large charge account. After encircling the globe, we pay a visit to our South American neighbors. Janet Weicht and Norman Kirkland have gone into partnership and own a dry-cleaning plant on the Amazon River. They don't clean clothes - they clean the natives. Brazil is world-renowned not only for its coffee but also for Brenda Daughtery's Chiropractical Rumba Studios for old men with arthritis. One, Two, Three, Ugh! One, Two, Three, Ouch! As we approach Jamaica's shores, we hear a different rhythm; Barbara Haynes has that Calypso beat as she dances on the sands. Irene Nichols is way out, man, as her bongo player. Day-ooooooo! Nearing the end of our journey, we fly over the United States to Alaska. Frankie Coell and Cathy Skinner were married after graduation and are residing in the Land of the Midnight Sun. They have a huge split-level igloo with a double garage; you see, they are a two-dog-sled family. Next, to the second largest state in the Union, where Pat Rowland has her hands full raising a family of blonde cowboys and Indians on the Weicht's Texas ranch. Bruce belongs to the Flying Farmers of Texas , and the whole gang visits the Coells in Alaska by helicopter every weekend. Another rich friend of ours, Lee Blackden, in 1961, made a billion clams on Fizzies stock in the stock market phenomenon of all time. Lee is a philanthropist and travels incognito as a bum, enjoying the art of simply living. J. W. Wells is practicing law in Ohio, when he is not coaching the Cleveland Browns in football or managing the Cleveland Indian Major League ball club. J. W. 's record is pretty good. He hasn't lost one case or gridiron match, and the Indians are winning the World Series. Fasten your seat belts as we circle Idlewild International Airport. We are landing at New York, the Empire City, to visit the luxurious MAD Publications Offices, located at the corner of Fifth Avenue am. Tinn Can Alley (Rear). Libby Jarrett, who nearly went ma--let us not use that term loosely - insane, while putting out the Bulldog Bulletin in high school, is Editor-in-Chief of America's favorite magazine. Pursuing his art talent, Preston Stricklnad is Chief Cartoonist and Cover Illustrator for MAD. Preston is famous for his cover painting of Alfred E. Newman and the Prime Minister of Kalamazoo, matching pennies. Page Twenty

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LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT I, Bill Simons, will to Elizabeth Witt my position as anchor man in Trig class and the one theorum which always confused me: In equal circles, equal chords are equally distant from the center. I, Elaine McKendrec, leave to Alice Wintersteen my reputation for never driving over the speed limit; just over innocent pedestrians! I, Dick Dayton, bestow upon Linda Alien my library of horror comics for quiet evenings at home, and my unabridged copy of The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire , which makes a cool footstool. I, Donna Campbell, will to Judy Carlson my ability to type 150 words a minute with my left thumb; and to David Smith my inane laugh. I, Barbara Adams, leave to Linda Graeber my patience to wait for that special someone a long time. I, Gary Crist, give to Carolyn Maddux my old, worn-out sax reeds, and to Keith Johnson I bequeath my wonderful privilege of having no lunches. I, Bonnie Reed, do will to Doris Stewart my Peanuts comic strip collection and my pin-ups of Snoopy, and to Douglas Armstrong I will my book Ten Easy Lessons on Building Igloos in the South Seas. I, Jimmy Kress, leave to Curtis Tucker my jet-propelled motor-cycle and my nickname of Weed. I, Judy Oliver, (better known as Long Tall Sally) bequeath to Nell Odum my tendency to look down on everybody. I, Bruce Weicht, give to Terry Wright my old cigarette butts so he won't have to bum. I, Linda Freeburg, will to Margaret Johnson my skill for writing unreadable shorthand and my knack for hiding things and then not being able to find them. I, L. B. Jones, will to June Casten my 14 carat gold wall plaque with its motto: I may not be a genius, but I'm friendly! I, Pat Rowland, will to Sharon Wolancewich my old love letters and my fondest memories of Z.H.S. I, Sharon Forbes, will to Barbara Higginson my 101 Rest Book from band, with its 3,973 (count 'em) rests, and to Wayne Turner, I leave the bug , with all accessories, including squeaks, rattles, dents, and two-toned horn. I, Clayton Stokes, leave to Beatrice Pringle my engaging grin, showing my upper plate, and my nick- names of Tatter , Goose , and other endearing terms. I, Rae Foster, bequeath to Sandra Princher my worn-out majorette boots and my position on the first row, with the Pep Band, at basketball games. I, Preston Strickland, leave to Randy Lane my big ears and my gray hairs, and to Wayne Brunsdon I leave my talent for drawing cartoons on all the blackboards in school. I, Louise Leopold, entrust to the next editor of the Zephilsco five gallons of midnight oil, which are sure to be needed, and to David Smith my glasses in hopes that he will be able to see and under- stand Physics better than I did, and to Sarah Downs I leave my ability to change a flat tire and overhaul a motor in 57. 3 seconds. I, Victor Gerlach, bequeath to May McAllister my black leather jacket which has sheltered me from summer rain and winter cold and has lived to a ripe, old age, that is, for a leather jacket. Signed and sealed as and for their last will and testament by the Senior Class of 1960, in the presence of these witnesses. Witnesses: Dedi Anderson Bonnie Reed Signed: The Senior Class of 1960 Page Nineteen

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PROPHECY Gary Martinson is the adventurer and feature writer. This month's issue carries his special article I CAPTURED THE FIERCE FENISCEA TARQUINUS , (better known as the common butterfly.) Right now the MAD staff is launching a terrific sales campaign. Linda Lou Lohrum is the head sales- woman. Her method of madness is very successful. Imitating Santa Claus, she slides down the chimney if customers won't let her in the door. Louise Leopold is the fashion coordinator on the MAD staff. Look for the famous Leech label on the outside of your Mad T-shirts; no self-respecting Beatnik would be without one. Speaking of Beatniks let's be sure to take in Greenwich Village while in New York. Dick Dayton has taken residence there. His pad, dad, is the plainest, and he's the craziest of all the Boho's (Bohemians to you squirrels). Flying South toward home, we streak above our nations capital. Bonnie Reed was so impressed with Washington when we went there on our class trip that she never left. She took a job as an elevator operator in the Washington Monument, and was soon on her way up! Now Bonnie is a lady senator and has passed a bill abolishing home-work for upperclassmen. By the way, did you know that Bob Baggett was the first 19 year-old President of the United States? His studies were interrupted for four years, but then he returned to Baylor University, and later graduated from medical school with these degrees: M.D., D.O., D.D.S., P.D., and A. R. S. ( A Real Success) in initials! Vivian Geiger and Jeannette Howell, odd as it may sound, are now the leaders of a Boy Scout Troop. They have slightly changed the purpose of the organization: the club is now for girls who want to scout for boys. We have completed our flight around the world and are now cruising over our home state of Florida, where Robert Campbell has done earth-shaking things since graduation. He is now a big-time machine salesman and made his first fortune by selling the state a new type of earth-moving machine, which has been used to make a subdivision out of the Everglades. L.B. Jones designed the new Chevy bug of the future, which is on display in Zephyrhills. This unique little car doesn't run on gas, electricity, or solar energy - passengers pedal! Cape Canaveral, Florida, will be our jet-liner's last stop. Della Fae Smith and Carolyn Jarrett have top government positions there. Della Fae is a very private secretary for top secret operations and is invaluable to the United States because she so confuses the records that the Russians can't possibly decipher them. Carolyn, known as the Girl with the Golden Finger , plays the most important part in the launching of every missile - she pushes the button that fires it. In keeping with our class motto of Upward forever, ceasing never , some members of our class joined the outer space movement which was sweeping the country in 1960, so we'll change our mode of travel and visit them. Put on your space helmet, climb aboard the Interplanetary Rocket Strataliner, and prepare to blast off. Five, four, three, two, one -- Thank you, Carolyn! First the rocket must stop at the U.S. Space Station X69 to make final preparations for the long journey. Here we find two familair figures. Joe Laviano, a good will trumpet player who quells international crises with his soothing contemporary jazz, is currently giving a concert at the Interplanetary Summit Conference. And remember Bill Simons, who always wanted a life of leisure? Well, in a fantastic Physics experiment, Bill defeated the Law of Gravity and is now in a state of suspended animation, floating along-side the Space Station one half mile up. Leaving the Space Station, we have been provided with a guard of three to protect us from any un- friendly spaceniks. Jimmy Kress, Victor Gerlach, and our one fly-girl, Juanita Summerall, are now members of the Interplanetary Space Patrol, Huckleberry Hound Division. At last we reach the ultimate point on our itinerary - the Moon! Here we find the two members of our class who are the farthest out of all. Linda Freeburg and Sharon Forbes turned out to be pioneers. After graduating from business college, they established their own college on the Moon. They have the only accredited school that offers XLE-ORT for XLE-NITS. (That's Moon-talk for Simple Shorthand for Simple-minded people.) All that we, the Class of '60 have to add to these words of prophecy is: If this is the future, We Like It!. Poge Twenty-One