York College - Marathon Yearbook (York, NE)

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InInnniIIIinniinrriiiiiiiiiifiiiiIIIII1iIIi11vuiouiivi1ininIinIviiIiiIIIIiIiIIIIIiIiiIr1rII1niuiiiiiiiiiIIIIvnmnininimmnuiIIIIII1I1IuiiiuiiiiiimnnnnmunumvmmmmumuiiiinunnunnmmunirIiIIIiiiniiiiiiiiIu1I11unmmumunuui inn VIIXJC 10004 RQ' 1011 IGI! i f li' IE' 55 I iiiiIitinnnmmuiinmnni1iIIIvIIIIIiiiivIII1IIIIIIIIIIIiiiinnununnunumii1InniniiiiinnnnnmunumuninnniinIIInmunmIiIiuiinIiniIiivIi1i1IiInuIniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiviiiivnInriiIImnnnmnnnnuuiumm1uIIIIIinmnnnumuuuu THE GIRL WHO WROTE BY SOUND. I advertised for a shorthand igirl To write from my dictation, And, from the answers, picked a pearl fjudged by her applicationj. On either Smith or Remington No other girl was in it . In shorthand she had often done Two hundred words a minute. She also wrote she was young and smart, And acquainted with business wayg Six dollars a week sh'd accept for a start. lf I promised an early raise. fl hired this paragon off the bat, She went to work today, 'X pert young Miss in a picture hat, And a very engaging way. She had pompadour hair and a Marcel wave. Tan pumps and a Cuban heel, Iler fingers were freighted with gems that gave Sparkles almost like real. I started her off on a letter to llrown, I found she was slow. so I waited For her to catch up. .-Xt last 'twas all down. And this is what I dictated: In reply your wire this date To buy Amalgamated, XYe counseled you before to wait Till we'd investigated. XYhen Copper shrinks a point or two, XYe'll fill the order duly. If this does not seem wise to you Advise, yours very truly. This done, she faded from the room Into her private lair, Leaving an odor of perfume Upon the desert air. An hour passed 'ere she returned, Ilrown's letter written out, And here it is. I never learned XVhat it was all about: Henry. you are out of date. Too bad, and amble-gaited. lYe can't sell you at forty-eight Till we've investigated. NYhen the copper drinks a pint or two lYe'll fall toward her, Dooley. If this desisgin seems worse to you Devise, Yours very truly. Page One Hundred One

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1ul1111111In1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111mn1111111111111111.mm1mu111I111111ummu111111111111muIn11mmnu11ul11ulmimi--mm--ull QD' 'UDDI 15t J?c 15' IG 1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111nu11111111111mu11111111111111nun11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111 1111111111111111111111111111111111111111nnm111111mm1n1.11111-111111111111111111111111111111111 QE! UID! i?' '3' 1n111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111munm1111111111111111111111111111111111 Page One Hundred Ain't afraid of roarin' lions, Ain't afraid of bats, Ain't afraid of ele-phants, Ain't afraid of rats, Ain't afraid of snarling dogs, Ain't afraid of squirrels, Ainlt afraid of guinea-pigs-- Vllhat would C. Sea see, if C. Sea NVent on the sea to see all the things C. Sea would like to see? Why C. Sea, if he went on the sea, to see all the things C. Sea would like to see. C. Sea would see all that C. Sea had expected to see on But I'm scared to death of girls. -C. Phipps. the sea. 'I' 'I' 'l' 'l' -1- -1- -1- -1- DOPE. It is far better to have a policeman call you down than to TOOL CHEST ROMANCE' take you up. How disappointed the average man must feel every time he looks in the mirror. Perhaps a pretty girl is called a peach because she has a heart of stone. 'X' 'I' 'I' 'I' LOGIC. A drunkard sleeps soundlyg 0ne that sleeps soundly, breaks no lawsg He that breaks no laws is a good citizeng A good citizen is to be praisedg Therefore, a drunkard is to be praised. 'X' 'X' 'X' 'I' Ruth Haverneri f'Hugh! QPhewj, it is 'X' -I' 'X' 'I' Hirmon- Only fools are positive. McKee- Are ou sure? . Y . . ,, Hirmon- Yes, ositivel . P Y late. f'It is fplane' that I love youf, he began. 'iIs that on the 'levell?'l she asked. Haven't I always been on the fsquare' with you? he urged. 'fllut you have many 'vices, she remonstrated. Not a 'bit' of itf' he asserted. V.'hat made you 'brace' up ?l' she queried, coquettishly. 11' Phe fact that I 'saw' you, he replied with a bow. I ought to 'hammer' you for that, she answered saucily. Come sit by me on the 'bench,', he urged. A 11 'Suppose the others should ffiie' in ?l' she murmured. You shouldn't let your arms 'compass' me, she continued. I know a preacher that is a good fjoiner', he suggested. Promise not to 'chisell him out of his feef' she requested. H l'That wouldn't 'augerl well for us, he answered as they rushed off for a license. -P+-P+ Now is the time to buy thermometers. Thejsf'll soon be going up.

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II11rxIIvIvIIIllllIrummuuunnnmmumnnnmmII-.iIIII-Hl-4IIIIIIIIIIIllIIIIIlIIInumuuuuunnnnnlmnululllVIIIIIIIIII144114l11.IIIIIIIII-IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIinIII.umm.--.-nl-.u.I.IIIIInm.nuInuIIIIIIInmumnnwuum-innmmm ll! O24 151 'Q' i?' 'GE' OE! ld!! 'IDC 'ED InllIIIuuuuInnnnnmvunuumumlrluuurmlrrruunnuuIInIIuIIIIIIIIIIuIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIInIIII4III1IunInnnInInnII1111111141I1111lur1IIuun1n1nnInInInnnnnnvnn1nuIuIunnnnmunnuvuunnml1rInnnnnn11111uuunnnmnnnmlliIInnnn11nmnnlmnnnmun Page One Hundred Two IT CAN BE DONE. Even a policeman can't arrest the flight of time. said the funny man. Oh, I donlt know. rejoined the niatter-of-fact person. Only this morning I saw a policeman enter a sisle door and strip a few minx1te.'.' -I--I'-!'+ How fortunate I was not born a tree,'l quoth Skinny. VVhatever you were born, replied the oak, under which he stood, 'AYou are sure to di-a-logf' ' 'I-+++ VX'idow: I dread to fight the duel of life alone. jones: Then let me be your second. -I-'I-++ A pupil: Yes, l told Prof. that the white poker chip I dropped was a peppermint tabletf' Listem-r. Did he swallow it? -I--X-++ Gladys Crather bored and sleepy at ll :SO p. m.l 1 I donlt know a thing about baseball. Jack-- Let me explain it to youf' Gladys: Very well. give me an illustration of a home run. -I-+4-+ Myers Cto Miss Rogersl : How old are you? Miss Rogers: Twenty-one. Myers: Surely not! Miss R.: 'KI guess I am, I had the seven year itch three times. One hundred years ago today, VYhen wilderness was here, XYith powder in his gun, the man XYent out and got a deer. But now the thing has changed, And on another plan, lYith powder on her cheeks The dear goes out and gets the man. -X'-X'-P+ XX'hen a bit of sunshine hits ye, After passing of a cloud, XYhen a fit of laughter gits ye An' ye'r spine is feelin' proud, Donlt fergit to up and fling it At a soul that's feelin' blue, For the minit that ye sling it It's a boomerang to you. -I' 'X' -I' 'I- Maybe, Maybe, said an old darky, not eb' one who goes fishin' likes to fish. Ilut to my mind, suh, to my mind, sum men goes fishin' not so much foh de sake ob de fish, suh, as foh de Cl'lH1lCC to loaf without bein' noticed. 'I' 'I' 'I' 'I' The latest song hit of l92O-Hlfoys, have the courage to say 'Xof U -X--I--I--I' Neighbor: So your son got his li. A. and his M. A. 3 Father: Yes, but his P. A. still supports him.