Yeshiva University - Masmid Yearbook (New York, NY)

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SUMMA CUM KIBBITZING or History of The Class of ' 49 The four years of college life may be compared to the four portions of the Shulchan Aruch. In fact, Rabbi Karo ' must have composed his great work with an eye on the future students of Yeshiva College.- Understanding the influence that his book would have on us, he judiciously divided it according to the four stages of life that a student reaches during his four year stay in college. Each year it is proper for us to learn the portion ' ' that applies to our college life. FREShHMAN YEAR. This is the year of DSB ' D Q ' n. We arrive ready to do our own work and to learn all we can. Everything is done according to Ui:i. n, no cutting classes, no coming late, etc. We expect to write compositions for Dr. Klein in the class, to actually do our History assignments, to attend classes religiously and not to use pK in our Chem classes. We come from the four corners of the earth, but mostly from Brooklyn, to learn about . . . well, just to learn. ' ' We inquire for Yeshiva University ■ ' and are directed to a Moorish ' ' ' looking building ' ' with a dome ' ' and two mosques on the side. That ' s Yeshiva? Yeh, I know it looks like an Arabian nightmare but wait until you get inside! It is a few minutes before twelve and we enter the quiet restaurant across the street for a cup of coffee. Suddenly, like a sandstorm sweeping across the desert, we behold myriads of boys running across the street. The door is pushed open violently and a dozen voices shout, Combinatsalad — eggslox — bakefish — larglassofchocmilk. The crowd pours in and fills every corner of the cafeteria. The restaurant re- sounds with the noise of eating, pushing, -talking and shouting. Why doesn ' t Brenner open? And eat rubber steaks again? Rosen ' s growing another beard. Rav has another svora. And above the medley of voices can be heard that of Harry ' s, Why don ' t you boys take your time? I ' m getting out of this business. You fellows can make a fellow sick. And the boys at the cashier form a long line and get Harry sick. V e are allowed to soak in fully the grandeur of Yeshiva University ' s walls as we wait four hours to register. We spend the rest of the day cooling our heels before the dormitory office. We get our first taste of Yeshiva officialdom. We can ' t Baer it. Having entered upon the heels of the numerous and mighty class of ' 48, we aren ' t too highly touted. Those of us who are wise enough to heed the warnings of countless alumni and suffering students choose German. But there are always a few suckers or scholars. So, Ignoring the dire heedings, a goodly number of us continue French with Dr. Braun. The Shapiros and Lamms do well. The Golds ' are able to talk themselves into a good mark even in French. The rest of us just suffer and work — and how we suffer! We discover It is better to A-gree with Dr. Klein than to D-isagree with him. When Ducoff receives a D on his first composition, he knows he is starting from the bottom of the ladder in college. It is with Dr. Klein that we learn to use the ten minute rule. Guards are posted on the ground floor to watch for the Grand Old Man, Hilchot Collegiot XXX, 3. • ibid., XXXXV 96. = Tractate Masmid, 107 c. Dr. M. Frankel. one of the later Commentators, believes that the use of the portion is a later addition by Yeshiva scholars. Josephus Yoshor says that, anyhow, it ' s good materia! for an historical drama. ■»PK is defined as the Phinagler ' s konstant. See the article On the History and Use of pk in Non-Laboratory Media by Lamn and Katz under the direction of Profs. Levine, Isaacs. Levine, Kisch, Levine, Joseph. Levine and Levine. Zeymour Zeke Zahn believes this to be superfluous. In his Zounds, p. 3411, he says that at- tending Poli-Sci classes is preferable to studying. Cf. Propaganda and the Yeshiva University by S. Hartstein, 1st ed., 2nd ed., 3rd ed.,— 0° ■ ■-■ ibid. ' ibid. •■■ ibid. O-O-O-pen ze door Whats a few years, more or less, to a good pun? ' See Joel J. Gold ' s Epicurus, Poincare, Voltaire. Woman and Bedford Ave., published in Le Flambeau, 1979.

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JACK ZUCKER Philadelphia, Pa. One of our Lebanon boys, Jack came back to us thin and tired, but we fattened him up as purchasing manager of the Co-op. He was also a member of the Health Committee, the Placement Service, and on the circulation and business staff of Commie. A math major. Jack, no matter what his future, expects to learn more about figures. SOLOMON POUPKO Philadelphia, Pa. Sol, son of a rabbinical family, has made himself famous in Yeshiva with his hilarious imitations of rabbis and other such. A T.A. graduate, he attends Yeshiva and is an English major In College. He also learned at the Mirrer Yeshiva last summer. Sol intends to be a talmudic scholar and a teacher and critic of Charlie Bahn ' s poetry. CAMERA SHY

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and when the ten minutes have elapsed we rush for the entrance leading away from Dr. Klein. It develops into a great race almost every session — Dr. Klein running to intercept us and we. led by the indomitable Manny Baum, racing the other way. Some of us work for long extra hours on Dr. Levine ' s unknowns and others use their imaginative powers and guess (correctly, enough of the time). We elevate 1o the Presidency the noted author, Charles Neal Bahn, and to the Vice-Presidency, the dignified speaker and unbending worker, Joseph Yoshor, whose motto is, Never do today what you can put off till tomorrow. Nothing is heard from them until they run again. We debate most of the year in a series of highly unat- tended class meetings on a class trip which we do not hold and on class hats which we do not buy. Simon and Seller proceed to make themselves inconspicuous on the basketball team. Yoshor, Frankel and Drazin join the bottom ranks of Commie and everybody has a furn watching books disappear from the library. We are an average Freshman class and are molded into the proper forms without too much rebellion. We are still under the Influence of DStJ ' D icn. We are somewhat scorned by the seniors above but it Is a puerile year for them, and we feel we can do better. At least we mean to try. So we help elect Earl Klein to the Presidency of Student Council and start to really build a functioning student government. We are SOPHOMORES and ready to learn ntyn t3X. We are past the DSK ' D ItJ ' n stage. We know the ropes now. We understand that it is necessary to learn the great art of living, extra-curricular activity, mutual help, nrv. The road to success In college Is cooperation. What are the Soph courses? Let ' s see — advanced English, advanced Math, advanced French. Well, three is a more advanced number than one. We take only three and a half hours to register this time. It pays to date a secretary or two, eh Simon? Ted Steinberg ' and Moishe Twersky are elected, as Betar sweeps our class on a Beigln platform. Sol Blumenfeld gets the lowdown on writing philosophical sports columns from Mike Fenster. Denny Geller and Chiel Simon continue as our represen- tatives on the Mites. Sammy Kenner becomes team manager and supreme commander of the basketballs. Sy Schorr joins the Chess Team and Jack Zucker is usually found slugging away at a Yankee Doodle. Mike Korbman, a 5:45 riser In the army for a few years, exhibits a perfect example of retroactive Inhibition by sleeping straight through Abe Drazln ' s bugle calls in the mornings. Lo and behold, Melech Augenstein is married. Who could have imagined our fa- mous chasid being the first of the class of ' 49 to get hitched? He finds Bio a cinch. Of course. It will only be a one credit per year course for him from now on. Jolly well, Guvner Abramson Is wooing Le Flambeau, and it seems that he is destined to get H — vets get everything nowadays. Tobias Is learning to cuss in and at French. Our first class nite in years Is a success. With the play written by Joe Yoshor, and Eli Horowitz acting the leading role, we tie with the Juniors for first place. The little terrorist Maxle Frankel steals the show. The Soph Intramural team, composed of Sol Blumenfeld, Abe Drazin, Charlie Bahn, Sam Kenner, Denny Geller, Sam Glaser and Chlel Simon, play ball. Nough said, despite Blumenfeld ' s reading of Zarasthustra. On our French final exam we are asked to write the whole course. Jack Zucker doesn ' t know his head from his I ' assamolr, but then — who does? The Soph year is not very difficult. We are neither the lowly freshmen who suf- fer the effects of entering a new school (or Institution), nor the lordly upperclassmen who will have to run the school. But we will be upperclassmen next term and the change Is already felt In our class elections, for out of these elections will come the eventual Senior rulers of the school. Six of us run for President and another half dozen 1 V,. ' ' Seymour Haber, in his Books and Things. swears thai iwo branches of +he Yeshlva College Library have opened in the homes of Joe Gold and William Frank. ° See Bringing Dates lo Fruition, Yeshiva College Catalogue. ' Mentioned tn the Relics of Lebanon. by M. Aaron Carp. ' ibid. Related to the famous Devil Dog. A well-known aristocrat. See Tractate Sabbath I 14a concerningP ' i ' ' ?15 n TD-Thts is no joke 7 ' ' s