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Page 68 text:
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Page 67 text:
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Page 69 text:
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,,.,,,.,.NW,M,,-,N Illll, ,N ..,.............. ...,. ....-.....................,.........................................-..-............----..---.....-..........-.......................,.........-....,.... 'sas 'gszs.. a'-.5232 I,:.:::::.1.::.sz:rmszr-z:ra-:11:::::.4::n:::w:.'::.:::-.:..'vz::'.:1:,-1:1-,u':::::.arz.:v:ti::::r:::-'1 gg:E:,, N '-' Mm i 1 Q Sig by-11 fi ..... it X ,.l U -f--ill-mfirr. fl, , . . . .. ., .lj L3 2 'V 'RESET Il.-. L '.,.. '.!.IZI ---- ' 'I-'l. T.1T1'.Z'Z',.Il'.Z'Z.Z'.L1.1.'f'I-Tl'f ' 5:f7' -7i '1'f'-1fI:Z.Z .J2 f '..I'..1'lT1'l1'L. Wd: .. f 'f-' . - ' ' ' ,, ........-r-.:. - -L ...,.1a,a, , --...,-.-....-.WW--' --A -.--1-I..-.W -: :J-'-'zu--4--:va - I- , J , I . --4 , WHO'S YOUR AUNT?? P ? 9? THEODORE V ICKROY-511116, 1917 AY! I'1l bet you a quarter interest J in an Eagle Stamp that you cant hi name all your aunts, uncles, first c cousins, second cousins-once re- moved, and your other relations to the fourth degree. If you can't, you'd better hurry up and learn their names or you may get into a bad pickle. Mum, Dad and I were coming from Port- land fthe lVestern onej on our way to Europe, where we were to take a good long trip. Vlfhen we passed through Chi- cago, we were to have dinner with Mum's Aunt Mary. VN' e were to leave Aunt Mary's for the station at about seven, for the New York train left at eight. As the train drew near Evanston, I sud- denly remembered that Grubby IfVhite fso called because, when he hit the line, he went so low that his nose almost rooted up the groundj, my college chum, lived there, and that Grubby had asked me -last june, as we were packing up, to visit him this sum- mer. f'Gee willikensf' thought I, here's my chance to give Grubb-y a little surprise party. I had just time to say to the folks, Say, I'm going to say 'hello' to Grubby. I'll meet you at Aunt Mary's. Then I grabbed my hat and sprinted for the vesti- bule. VVhen I got on the station platform, I looked for- a cab, to ride to the house. I-Iowever, I changed my mind very quickly, for I found that my wallet had either been lost or stolen, and that I had only a little loose change, seventy-nine cents, I believe. I then made inquiries how to reach my friend's house, found that it was not far from the station, and so took the shoe-line to it. I-Iowever, when I arrived there, it was only to turn around and hike for the Northwestern, for the family had gone away for the summer. I was just in time to miss the three o'clock train. After a wait of about an hour CI know it was that long, although the com- pany's clock made it only fifteen minutesj, the next train came along, and I piled on. We pulled into the Chicago station at four o'clock. ' As I stepped from the train, it suddenly dawned on me that I no more knew Aunt Mary's address than I knew who had been the first wife of the governor of Patagonia. I wasn't alarmed, though, for I had been led to believe that there are telephones, even in Chicago. Indeed, I knew there were two companies. I supposed that they had the habit of getting out directories. Accord- ingly, I strolled leisurely to the drug store in the station, and picked up the only tele- phone book there, the Bell, I think, or per- haps it was the Automatic. Anyway, when I was just about to open it, I remembered that I had no last name for Aunt Mary. So far as I knew, I never had seen Aunt Mary. I had heard of her a great deal, but one does not call his aunt by her last name, so I probably had hardly ever heard her final moniker. After racking my brains for several min- utes, I finally decided that it was either Aunt Mary Bandon and Aunt Cary Lander, or Aunt Mary Lander and Cary Bandon. To settle the question, I looked up both Mrs. Mary Bandon and Mrs, Mary Lander. Not finding either, I walked out, and Started up the street, looking for a store which possessed an Automatic, or, anyway, it was the other telephone book. I found one, all right, but that was as far as my success went. Then I remembered that Mum had said she was terribly deaf. Maybe she couldn't enjoy a telephone. I then recollected having seen a city directory in the first store, so, nothing daunted, I walked briskly back to it. I opened it, and looked for my names again. Great Scott! They were not there! Then it came to me that I heard Mum say a Sixty-five
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