Yeatman High School - Yeatman Life Yearbook (St Louis, MO)

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OF THE SALT OF THE EARTH GERTRUDE LYNN XVALTHISR-june, 1917 H HAT new office boy of yours said you were too busy to seeleven 'a client, but, as Im not in that tr' class, I just blew in. It was not necessary for me to look up to know that my visitor was none other than Sophronia Stubbs. As she herself had said, my old friend Phronie could hardly be called a client. ,She has too much of the milk of human kindness in her nature ever herself to become in- volved in a lawsuit. But in all my years of legal practice I have not had a more loyal supporter than Phronie. Whenever one of her friends-and they are legion, ranging from the poorest on the East Side to the richest in the W'est End-is in need of a lawyer, she never rests until she has landed him at my shop. Phronie is not sensitive about her age and will cheerfully admit to being about fifty years-young. Her own troubles, and more particularly the misfortunes of her friends, have not failed to leave tell-tale lines upon her face. but lines which are softened by the kindly gleam of blue eyes and are almost lost in her genial smile. She is a magnificent figure, tall, commanding, rather masculine. Her suits are always plain and mannish and never by any chance does she wear a hat that is in style. Such trivial things as clothes she affects to scorn, yet I have known her to waste a whole evening helping a young girl friend doll up for a party. For all her matter-of-factness and masculinity, Phronie is really a sentimentalist at heart. 'When I first met her, she was playing the piano in the old Orpheum Opera House. It was while I was working my way through law school, and I used to usher at the Or- pheum in the evenings. In her youth-that is, whenishe was about seventeen-Phronie had taken music lessons for as much as six months and had learned to play the Sack NValtz, The Maiden's Prayer, and The Battle of Praguef' This completed her musical education, and thus equipped, she had undertaken to teach the unsuspecting innocents of the poor district' in which she lived, at twenty-live cents a lesson, also to play the Sack Waltz. Phronie never labored under the delusion that she was a musician, but to her devoted disciples she was ever a genius. After hav- ing, by teaching, created a demand for pianos, Phronie now took to selling them to supply that demand, and, in time, became head-saleswoman of a piano iirm, but that was later. At the time I first met her, she was helping to eke out an existence for her- self and her old father by adding to her pedagogic and .salesmanship activities the thumping of the tin-piano instrument which passed for a piano in the Orpheum orches- tra. She and I often laugh at the thrilling melerdramers we used to see there. The thought of matrimony had never en- tered Phronie's mind-that is, so far as it concerned herself. In respect to other peo- ple, however. she had all the old match- making dowagers and chaperons beaten a mile. lVell, to get back to my story. Phronie breezed in, and after having in- quired minutely into the well-being of each and every member of my family, broached the real object of her visit. She had just had paid to her four hundred dollars, and came to consult me about the investment of it. Funny thing about this money, she in- terrupted in the midst of my explanation of how we ought to invest it-Phronie is feminine in one quality, she will get off the track of the subject in hand- Funny thing. I had kissed this money good-bye a long One Hundred Three

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place in which to live. Because we will have studied the fiowers and birds, Nature will have a new meaning, and hence, a new enjoyment, for us. Through our studies of History and Economics, we will be able to understand the importance and origin of most of the social and political institutions of the world-we will have gained interest in the affairs of our country and its people. The world of literature, with which we shall have become acquainted, will cause our imaginations to quicken at the suggestion of some familiar phrase and will provide enter- tainment .for idle hoursi The most sordid task will be surrounded by the glamour of the inner beauty which we will acquire. To sum it up, the college provides the lasting things of life to those who are will- ing to work for them. These three great boons await us: H'ealth, wealth, happiness. and, in addition, the equally important ones of friendships and interests. Then for the sake of these advantages, which will make us of use to any community, an inspiration to our friends, and an aid to future genera- tions, let us turn to the college, Hthe foun- tain of perpetual youth-the youth of the spirit. WISHES ESTHER M. 101-INSON-111116, 1917 I wish I'd been a Cave Boy in the Prehistoric Age, Although the dinosaur roamed 'round and wasn't in a cage. W'hen the Cave Boy in the morning took his usual road to school, If he felt hot and weary, he would plunge into a pool. fAnd while he's there, I'll tell you why I envy his lot soy It's a very serious matter, and I think you ought to know. He didn't have to hurry if the hour was getting late: For there wasn't a Miss Carney to make him mend his gait. He didn't have to think about that nickel library fine, And nearly rush himself to death to get upstairs by nine. He had no frightful troubles to disturb his nightly rest, fI'm referring to our custom of observing ten week's testsl. He didn't have to study hard for hours the night before, He didn't have to cogitate on HQSO4. He didn't have to struggle through great Burke's Conciliation , He didnit have to ruminate on problems of a nation. - Translations from the Latin never bothered him at all, He never heard of Caesar and his mighty wars in Gaul. He didn't have to rave about the Babylonian homes, Or fall into a rhapsody on the grandeur that was Rome's. He didn't have to ponder over shirts and socks and ties, And choose a pleasing color scheme to charm his teacher's eyes. No, when the Cave Boy with reluctance left his cool, refreshing pool, He donned his little tiger skin and strolled along to school. More likely when he got there, he'd find upon thedoor, f'The dinosaur has been here and dear teacher is no more. So when I think of all the things he didn't have to do, You don't know how I envy him, by the way, d0n't you? One Hundred Two

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time ago. Never thought to see it again. Did you know jim Allen? He was ushering down at the Orpheum the year before you came. I settled back in my chair. VVhen Phronie begins this way, it means a story, and thereis no use trying to stop her. It can't be done. I always did like jimj' resumed Phronie, reminiscently, even thought he wasn't much account. Yet he was honest as daylight and the funniest kid to talk to. If he only hadn't been so darn lazyg He and indolence were twin brothers. The kid was bright enough, but he hated work and life seemed to have cast him for the title role of 'A Fool and His Money Are Soon Partedf Yet, he didn't blow all his money in on himself, mind you. That was the redeeming feature of his weakness. It was only that he and the little penny-in-the-slot savings bank hadn't even a bowing acquaintance. VVell, Jim went along this way for some time, and then-he met the Girl. 'KShe was a sweet little thing, one of my former pupils, and she and Jim fell head over heels in love with each other after their first meeting. For the next few weeks jim nearly drove me crazy with talking about that girl. Every time he'd come near, I knew I'd have to adore the name and listen to the praisesi of Maidie. If it had kept up much longer, I'm afraid I should have EIC- tually come to dislike the child. Of course, after all this, I was able to take it very calmly when Jim came to me, about a month later, and announced that he and lllaidie werelgoing to marry. 'I haven't got a cent to my namef he said, cheerfully, 'but I know that if I had Maidie to encourage me and a little money to get started on, I'd get along all right in no time. You know I never can save a blamed nickel-' One Hundred Four 'No, you can't Iim,' I encouraged. 'But if I once got started-Listen, Phronie, if you'll just lend me four hundred so we can get married and settle down, I'll pay it back within a year's time with in- terest. I swear I will, Phronie. You see, Maidie's father doesn't like me, so if we're going to be married at all, we've got to skip tonight while he's out of town.' Oh, well, what's the use? How could I dash cold water on all that enthusiasm? I knew very well Jim couldn't save a cent and they'd probably be unhappy, but I knew, too, they'd be ten times unhappier if they weren't married, so I took my four hundred from my stocking and told the youngsters to run along and elope with the cash. i'That was twenty years ago. I never heard from the kids after that night. It didn't surprise me, for I knew jim's failing too well, yet-I couldn't help feeling a little disappointed. I Yesterday I received this cheque. It was from Jim Allen, and with it a long letter. He and Maidie had never written because, what with sickness. babies--there were four of them-and misfortunes generally, they had been kept poor, and were ashamed to write unless they could return the money. They have just begun to grow prosperous. The babies are growing up and -here Phronie chuckled delightedly- what do you suppose those two silly youngsters did? Named their first baby, a girl, after me! Imagine the poor child going through life with a name like that tacked to her. Shes eighteen now and looks like her mother, so she must 'be pretty. Say, come to think of it. you needn't bother about that investment. just make out -a bond for her with the money. It might sort of compensate her for having to he a 'Sophroniaf Phronie added, apologetic and a little ashamed.