Woodstock Collegiate Institute - Oracle Yearbook (Woodstock, Ontario Canada)

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Guitars Records Pianos Record Players PHILIPS, ADMIRAL 3. MARCONI RADIOS SNELL'S ELECTRIC 440 Dundas St. Phone 357 Mrs. Simpson entered her husband's of- fice unannounced and found him with his secretary seated on his lap. With rare pre- sence cf mind he said: Now don't get ex- cited dear: I didn't want to tell you, but busi- ness is so bad that I am studying to be a ventriloauist. Courtship causes a man to spoon -- Marriage to fork over. . . . Mac: Skinner, don't laugh at Moose. lt isn't right to have fun at his expanse. The reason a dog has so many friends ffhe wags his tail-not his tongue. 1' 1' 1 Mrs. Scott: Dodn't I hear the clock strike three when you got in last night. Bob: Yes Mother. It was going to strike seven but I stopped it so it wouldn't waken you. . . . Gilbert Ross: But what has your boy friends cadet training got to do With his waving at every pretty girl he sees. Helen Cunningham: Oh, he's in the signaling corps. High School Graduates MAKE NURSING YOUR CAREER THE NURSING PROFESSION OFFERS YOU EXCELLENT OPPORTUNITIES Classes Admitted February and September APPLY TO- Superintendent of N urses, Woodstock General Hospital One Hundred and Two THE ORACLE

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Compliments of BEEMER'S TAXI O 24 Hour Service O 3 Light St. Phone 323 Don A: How do you get rid of fleas? Lloyd A: That's easy. Take a bath in sand and a rubdown in alcohol. The fleas get drunk and kill each other throwing rocks. - - - Sign on shack at the fork of a mountain road in backwoods section of Virginia: Don't ask informationfif we knew any- thing we wouldn't be here. Doctor: l hate to bring this up, but that check you gave me came back. Ronald S: Believe me, l don't like to mention this either, but so did my stomach ache. - - lt was lunch hour at school and Monk's two buddies decided to play a little joke on him. During his absence, they drew the features of a donkey on the back of his coat, which he had left in his locker. ln due time, Monk discovered the picture. Whats the trouble, Monk? asked Moose, trying to appear innocent. Nothing much, replied Monk. Only l'd like to know which one of yez wiped your face on me coat. H 0 M 0 M I l K t Gives That Zest For Life l iD .-in 1 l 000519 l A QV 41 E 'l l 4 6 MAPLE DAIRY COMPANY L I MITED l PHONE lO7l THE ORACLE One Hundred and One

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COMPLIMENTS OF The Oxford Former's Co-operative Produce Company Limited EGGS --- POULTRY --- CHEESE 434 Main St. Phone l 528 , ,t I I Compliments of l I JACK FOWLER'S , DRUG STORE . ir l 533 Dundas Street Phone ll4-4 , l I lean Ferguson: Don't you think I show distinction in my clothes? Doug Philpott: Well-ersthat is, I think distinctly would be a better word. 1- it Q Lady: How much are those tomatoes? Grocer: Seven cents a pound, ma'arn. Lady: Did you raise them yourself? Grocer: Yes, they were tive cents a pound yesterday. i i' Q I think I'll be a business man, said George to Harry S. Iudging from the way my homework stumps the old man, ya don't have to know a thing. t 1- 1 Mr. Blair: What are the three import- ant Greek orders? Ioe Mcliewan: Cups skuttey, rroas bit sanwhich, and peas coconut pie. fr at 1- She: My sin is vanity. I spend hours admiring my good looks. I-le: That isn't vanity, that's imagina- tion. BIGHAM THE MOVER Established 29 Years Agents for Allied Von Lines Ltd. HOUSEHOLD FURNISHINGS MOVED CAREFULLY - STORED SAFELY PACKED SECURELY Office ond Warehouse 202 Wellington St. N. Phone 828 THE ORACLE One Hundred and Three