Winthrop High School - Winthrop Winner Yearbook (Winthrop, ME)

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WINTHROP HIGH SCHOOL 53 H My little brother has learned an aw- ful lot about kissing from going to the movies. You mean the pictures he sees are so daring ? No, I mean the couples he sees around him are so daringf, L. Mason: I'm the fastest man in the world I' E. Smith: I' How's that ? Mason: Time flies, doesn't it, well. I beat time ! More at the Source Mrs. Brown: 'K Theres not a boy in this town as clever as our Jack, Mrs. Black: 'K How is that? Mrs. Brown: Look at these two chairs. jack made them out of his own head and he had wood enought left to make an armchairfy ' A Challenge Laugh that off, said the fat man's wife as she sewed his vest buttons on with wiref' Not the Bank An elderly lady, afraid of passing her destination, poked the conductor with her umbrella, H Is that the First National Bank ? she asked. No, mum,'i replied the conductor, themis my ribs!'l It's nothing much to think of-but every now and then, I wonder where M. Gandhi carries his fountain pen. In a game itys grit, but in spinach itis terrible. Healey: W'hat kind of a car do you have ? G. Shute: A runaboutf' Healey: A runaboutf, Shute: 'K Yes, itlll run about a block and then stopf, Miss Frost: Fools ask questions wise men can't answer. ' Lincoln: Y e ah , that's why I ilunked my last exam. that if all students who were placed end to end, they would be much more comfortable. VV e believe sleep in class Prof. Bore: f'If I have talked too long it's because I forgot my watch and there is no clock in this hall. Student Body: Theres a calendar behind youfl B. Reynolds: 'I It takes three genera- tions to make a gentleman. S. Rourke: Your grandson will be all right then!'i Don't Pour Over This H. Diamond: 'I W'hat is worse than to rain cats and dogs P E. Bates: To hail street cars. Bargains Mother: Kenneth, how is it that you have lower marks in January than in December. K. Higgins: Oh, everything is marked down after the holidaysfi Epitaph to a Reckless Driver Here lies one Alexander Gray, ' Who died while taking the right-of-way, He thought he was right, as he sped along, But he' just as dead as if he were wrong. I know a chap whois twice as partic- ular about his business suit as he is about his evening clothesf, Thatis strange, isn't it ?,' No, you see heis a deep-sea diverf' Present day civilization might be de- fined as the present generations settling the last generations debts by issuing bonds for the next generation to pay.

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52 WINTHROP VVINNER In the history class the other day Hewett couldn't name more than sixteen presidents of the thirty-two presidents of the United States and that riled the teacher. Why Mr. Hewettj' said Mr. Ingalls, Vlfhen I was as old as you I could name every one of the presidents. Yeah, teacher, but there wasn't nearly so many of 'em then. Definition of school-52 hours of agony. This year-Miss Tapley bought an alarm clock to wake up her typing stu- dents. Principal - Qin assemblyj 2 A' Now I want you students to be so quiet you can hear a pin dropfl Freshman voice: Let'er drop. Miss Frost: Uliver, define the word puncture. O. Jackson: A puncture is a hole in a tire, usually found a great distance from a garage. Mr. Ingalls: Can anyone tell me what happened after Napoleon mustered his army ?'l G. Shute: Yes Sir, he peppered the enemy and took the cidadel by assult. Mr. Ingalls: Sit down my lad, I'll have no sauce from you ? Ingalls: Can you give me an ex- ample of wasted energy? O. Baltic: Yes sir, telling a hair- raising story to a baldheaded man. Pa, said johnny, looking up from his composition, is waterworks all one word or do you spell it with a hydrant ? Miss Frost: Has this dog a good pedigree P Salesman: Say, if he could talk, he wouldn't speak to either of us.', Mason took his aunt Though wintry was the breeze. He put her in the rumble seat, To watch his anti-freeze. R. House: Never despair. Some- where above the clouds the sun is shin- ing. I. Fleury: Yes, and somewhere be- low the sea tl1ere's solid bottom, but that doesn't help a man when he falls over- board. L. Fowle ' 'X 'Xnd what's your name my good man F Prisoner L. Fowle: Prisoner namefl 4, U 9142. Is that your real name ? Naw, dat's me pen- A Scotchman was stripping wallpaper from the walls of his house when a friend called to see him. ' YVell, Sandy, said the visitor, are ye goin! to have new paper? Na, na, replied Sandy. .'Xh'm just movin' into another house. Kus: And for B o n n i e Annie Laurie, I'd lay me down and die! Maxwell: QRisingj, Is Miss Laurie in the audience P H. Smith: Miss Tapley, Is the ex- ercise you gave us for tomorrow hard? In other words would it take more than one period to do it in ? Miss Tapley: Youlll be able to do it in one period if you use your head. H. Smith: Then I guess I'll use two periods. Miss Frost: This is the worst com- position in the class - I'm going to write your father about this. W. Wells: I don't care if you do because he wrote it. J Bow legs are few and far between.

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54 WINTHROP VVINNER About all that is now visible of the peace dove, released twelve years ago at Versailles, is the bill. Economics Class Il. VVebb: VVhatls the definition of laziness ? Mr. Ingalls: Deblois and Gaylord are two very good examplesf, Alfred Maxwell was about to purchase a seat for a movie in the afternoon. The box office man asked, U XVhy aren't you at school? Ch, it's all right, sir, said Alfred earnestly, I've got the measles. Miss Frost: Dottie, name one bird that is now extinct. Dottie Taylor: 'K Dick. Miss Frost: Dick, what kind of a bird is that ? Dottie Taylor: Qur canary. The cat extincted him. Many students are like coffee-98 per cent of the active ingredient has been removed from the bean l Sonnyl' said the dietitic mother, do you want mamma to tell Santa Claus to stay away from here? Then eat your spinach. Alright, sighed the modern child, only it sounds like blackmail to mef' Son: Say Dad, if the world is round and turns on its axis every twenty- four hours, what keeps us from falling off when it's upside down Pl' Dad: Why the law of gravitation, sonf' Son: Thatls what our teacher says, but I can't figure out how folks stuck on before that law was passed. Teacher in U. S. History: When was the revival of learning? Student: 'K just before the examf, Magnanimous College Graduate: VV ill you pay me what 1,111 worth F Employer: I'll do better than that: I'll give you live dollars a week to start with. Mr. LaPlant: Healy, what does II N O-3 signify ? Healy: Ah-er-- I've got it right on the end of my tongue, sir. Mr. LaPlant: Well, you'd better spit it out. lt's nitric acid. Illiterate Officer Qto blind man reading news- paperj : XVhat's the idea? You've been begging because you're blind and now I see you reading a newspaperf, Blind One: Aw. I'm just looking at the pictures. He Ought To Know A young man once asked Thomas A. Edison if he didn't believe that genius is inspiration. No, replied Edison, genius is perspiration. just Like That Pat was looking for a job. The boss asked him what he could do. Pat said, I can do anythingf' Can you wheel a barrel of smoke ? Sure,', said Pat, I'll wheel it if you fill it for me. , Turner - Qpreparing an e s s a y j 2 What do you call those tablets that the Gauls used to write on ? K. Higgins: Gaul stonesf' VV hat do you think of our ten candi- dates for class presidents? Well I'm glad only one can be elected. What everyone needs at six week tests - Headache Pills.