Wheeler High School - Wheelerite Yearbook (North Stonington, CT)

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Zhe Day of the Cobalt TIME: June 4. 1988 PLACE: Anywhere, but mainly at the Proving Grounds at Dinamo, Nevada. It was on this fateful day that the earth shook, exploded and crumbled. A cobalt bomb had set off a chain reaction of explosions; the people of the earth were utterly destroyed. Except, that is, for members of the class of '58. Below are the probable occupations of each member of this class as it might happen in 1988 - the day of the cobalt. The first thing this tribe needed was dwellings. This task was taken over by John Scott and Ronnie Stedman who would have been draftsmen in our day. They designed a wonderful apartment building - a cave, of course. Of course everyone knows - we did anyway - that to be progressive we must have education. Right up there in cave No. 5 is the school-house and inside, I hope, are three teachers. Susan Brown teaches the little kiddies basket weaving, pottery, sewing and all the other basics while Jimmy Smith teaches the little darlings that ug and wug-bug. Marilyn Main teaches the business end to the children - the end of the big stick - you know. Of course every tribe must have a Dulles, ours being Donald Hayes because he could talk the other tribes out of attacking us, for he was a public relations man or would have been if - . But now, if we were attacked, don't think for one minute that we would not be ready. Robert Banning formed a thing called a Navy and had two boats he called battle ships because it was a battle to ride on one of those logs. George McGowan started an Army that fought on land with his wonderful invention - the spear. Our village was not without its science, no sir! Robert Hauptmann and Bob Boissevain have recently discovered a square doesn’t roll as well as a circle does, but as of yet have not found a use for this great fact. Give them time -after all. they're only engineers. Scientists, Doug Bassett and Dave Champagne have made the astounding discovery of a thing called fire. They found out that it makes smoke but that's about all. Guess fire won't amount to much. The restaurant business got its initial beginning when Virginia Birkbeck opened her Home-Cooked Food Shoppe in cave No. 8 on Ledge 2. Religion got its beginnings by Robert Adams, who would have been a missionary if, you-know-what had not happened. He is our tribe's legal advisor to heaven, and doing a good job, too. We even have the honor of having a medical authority in our town. Her name is Nancy Hayes; she runs a physical therapy shop in cave No. 9 and business is booming. Donald Graichen and Roy Lee even made a nail once. Jackie Taylor, Carol Burdick, Beverly Wilcox and Chris Danko are all writing or drawing our advancements on the walls of caves by a new method of shorthand - hiro-glif-ics. They all were determined to be secretaries if the world hadn't exploded when it did. As you leave our village you shall probably see the most industrious man of our tribe, Winfield Stedman. He has set out to push the mountain away so that the sun will rise earlier in the morning. He is the world's first bulldozer operator.

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Class Will We, the Senior Class of Wheeler High School of North Stonington, in this year of 1957-58, being of sound mind and body, do hereby make this, our last will and testament. I, Robert Adams, will my janitor's position to Brian Hill who is already somewhat indoctrinated. I, Robert Banning, leave my experience with CHICKS” to Thurlow Coats. I, Douglas Bassett, will whatever I have to whoever needs whatever I have and can do anything with whatever this thing is. I, Virginia Birkbeck, just left . . . 1, Robert Boissevain, leave all my excuses for tardiness to Jonathan Nichols. I, Susan Brown, will my ability to get along with fellow juniors to Billie Platt. I, Carol Burdick, will my many athletic abilities to good-natured Frances Smith. I, David Champagne, leave to Miss DePaul my wonderful and profound memory. I, Christine Danko, will my artistic abilities to Marlene Driscoll. I, Donald Graichen, will my curly hair to Danny Bill. I, Robert Hauptmann, will my absolute genius with the guitar to Hollis Scott. I, Donald Hayes, will my eagerness in French 11 to anyone who wants it. I, Nancy Hayes, leave my many qualities to be divided among the Junior Class. I, Roy Lee, leave my muffler-bearings and Foo-Foo valve from my Ford to Charles Bliven. I, Marilyn Main, leave my many musical abilities to Elaine Belanger. I, George McGowan, wish I had something to leave but circumstances as they are I need all I've got and more, too. I, John Scott, leave my agreeable personality to anyone fitted to accept it. I, James Smith, will my genius to that DARLING Carol Johnson. I, Ronnie Stedman, will my crew cut and my muscles to Tommy Knight. I, Winfield Stedman, leave my ability to break into the lunch line and never get caught to Robert Nagle who always is. I, Jackie Taylor, leave my love for dancing to Harold Stedman. I, Beverly Wilco, will my shyness to Rommy Boissevain who needs it.

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