Western Union College - Pilot Yearbook (Le Mars, IA)

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A FEW ALREADY CRACKED Peterson: This new roommate of mine studies a lot. Shive: Patience, old man, you can easily break him of that habit. Warden: Have you any questions to ask before I turn the current on ? Convict: 'fYeahl VVhat does the paper say about the weather for tomorrow ? Does the coach have the team under control? Does he? Say, every time he gets a headache everyone on the varsity takes an aspirin. Oh, freshman! VVhat hazing has been committed on thy frame! Student fto elderly auntjz Let's walk down here, Aunt Ivlelinda, I want you to see our football field. 21 Aunt Meliiida Ctrying to pleasej : Oh, how sweety I've always been anxious to see field of footballs in full bloom. Can you spell homicide ? I can make a stab at it. So you've bought another car, professor ? Yesg I couldn't remember exactly where I parked the other one. Haas: Have you been getting a hair-cut ? Bayless No! I just had my ears moved down an inch. Vivienne: He is heaven's answer to a squi1jrel's prayer. Reynolds: He must be a nut. L,., U 1 -H' Dentist: Every tooth in your head should cbme out. Scotchman: How much would the new ones cost me? Dentist: f'Seventy-five dollars. Scotchman: And how much allowance on the old ones ?' !! l Lian fat door of sorority housej: Is May in P Beautiful Cbut dumb, Pledge: May who? lVIan fbecoming exasperatedl : VVhy, lVIay O'Naise, of course. Beautiful fbut not so dunibj Pledge : Sorry, but bday O'Naise is dressing. Skelton: Hey, I wanna exchange this text book. Mfr. Hix: Too lateg you've had it a whole term. Skelton But I just found out that eve1y other page is missing Page 119

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i S ' imp 1 1 l A COLLEGE AND ITS ALUMNI A college should pride itself in its campus, its material assets and equipment, its faculty and its courses of study, but its chief satisfaction should be found in its gradu- ates, their achievements, the success with which they take their place in the world's work and discharge their debt to human society. Apart from this standard of meas- urement no educational institution is able to justify its existence. While VVestern Union College has a modest pride in its beautiful campus and modern buildings, its alert and competent faculty, its growing prestige in state and nation, it finds its highest satisfaction and most justifiable pride in its graduates who have entered the various callings of life where they have achieved and are achieving success and eminence in such a way as to lift their Alum llflater into the light of growing prominence. The Alumni group is not large, but commensurate with the time and effort in- volved in the history of the college, and it justifies the expectation of the founders and supporters of the institution and promises a great future for it. The college was founded in the year 1900, and while its oldest graduates are still comparatively young, it has made for itself an enviable record. The Alumni are widely distributed among the professions and callings of life, but a very interesting fact is discernible, namely, that a large percentage have entered pre- eminently altruistic callings. The college has graduated, in all, but twenty-five classes. For a number of years these classes naturally were very small. Yet the col- lege has sent into the missionary Held fforeign and mountain work in Americal thirty-five workers distributed as follows: China, 11 5 Japan, 2 5 Africa, 65 Kentucky mountains, 16. For the Work of the Christian ministry it has furnished fifty-nine men. A large number of the graduates are successfully engaged in the teaching pro- fession as high school teachers, principals and superintendents. The college has con- tributed a due proportion to the teaching force of a number of the higher institutions of learning. Four of its graduates, after earning graduate degrees in leading univer- sities, are now heads of departments in Westerii Union College, two occupy chairs in prominent theological seminaries, one is a professor in a leading state college. lyleasured by the standard of the achievements of its graduates in the high callings of life, VVestern Union College has ample reason to be proud of her children. While the alumni of a college are the chief glory of that college they are and must be its chief support. A college has a right to look to its graduates for appiieciation and support. It cherishes deeply the sentiment of loyalty on the part of its alumnig but more than thatg it must depend upon that loyalty expressed, not merely in sentiment but in moral and material support, for its development and increase of power to fulfill its mission in human society. Page 118 ,

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SQUINTS THROUGH THE DORM Weriili Hall has a hospitable atmosphere. It welcomes grocers, lovers, misogynists, laundrymen, QUARTETS, ping-pongers, and various other reptiles. The rugs show peculiar erosions. Foot-shaped grooves in groups of four are hol- lowed into the Hoors. ' If one could only bottle up the tunes that escape from the piano, there would be everything from The Call of the Wild to Just Before the Battle. Then there's the telephone right out in the open where conversations are perpetu- ally audible. Sometimes you might hear, Hello, are you there? Can't you go? I believe you could ride in one of the cars with the Girls' Glee Club, they won't mind having only ten in one car. Why don't you come over? I haven't seen you for two whole hours. A11 right-l'll be seeing you. In small inclosed compartments the fair ones live. These rooms contain every- thing from mouse traps and masculine photographs to artificial dogs. The internal order of this home of many cherubs is tranquil except when it is chaotic. Not a sound is ever heard through the corridors. The inhabitants study incessantly until the matron comes and removes their books and gently reminds them that they must have diversion. Then they gather en masse and go to a collegiate debate that their souls might be enraptured and refreshed. This dorm life is varied and no two days are ever alike because Union Hall often contributes to its interest. AS WE FIND THEM Found in a Frosh registration card: Question-Give parents' names. Answer-lVIama and Papa. ' lVIr. Cates: Greece used to be a powerful nation. What is it now? Norman Jorgenson: Twenty cents a pound. Dr. Zuehl: I suppose if you inherited five dollars from your grandfather, that would be heredity. I Olson: No, that would be a miracle! Son: I ran all the way home behind a street car and saved a dime. Father: Why didn't you run behind a taxicab and save a dollar? Freshie: What's a divorce suit? Soph: The opposite of a union suit. Page 120