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Page 93 text:
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BOOK Pagre ninety-one Keith—“Have you an opening here for an unusually bright and energetic young man ?” Manager—“Yes, I believe we have, and please close it softly as you go out.” Mrs. Robertson—“Now Weller tell what I’ve punished you for.” Weller—“That’s right—first you make me stay in for three hours and then you want to know what you’ve done it for.” !j£ Bill Simonton—“What did your mother say when she heard you had failed?” McMurchy—“She became historical.” Bill S.—“Hysterical, you mean.” McMurchy—“No. I mean historical. She dug up my past and reviewed my sins.” He Mr. Copeland—“Can you tell me how many tons of coal were shipped from Canada in any one year?” Bill Todd—“Yes, sir—1492—none.”
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Page 92 text:
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Page ninety YEAR Mel. Snowden—“Jack Biddell certainly is dumb. He thinks a rugby coach has four wheels.” McElroy—“That is the height of dumbness. How many wheels has the darn thing anyway?” Bob Foulds (watching Pat Jacques eating peanuts)—“Down where I come from we use peanuts to fatten hogs.” Pat (sweetly)—“Is that so? Here, have some.” ♦ ♦ ♦ Grace—“What’s the matter, Don? You look worried.” Don—“Homework, Homework, Homework, from morning till night. It’s a dog’s life.” Grace—“How long have you been at it?” Don—“Oh, I start tomorrow.” “It’s the little things in life that tell,” said Carrie Speer, as she dragged her kid brother from underneath the sofa. Ruth Morgan—“What is repartee?” Dave Davidson—“Oh, merely an insult with its dress suit on.” The lights in a crowded street-car had failed and the passengers were thrown into confusion. “Can I find you a strap?” Jimmy McGill asked Alberta Ross at his side. “Thank you,” replied Alberta sweetly, “but I have already found one.” “Good,” replied Jimmy. “Then perhaps you wouldn’t mind letting go of my ❖ She—“But Mother I can’t marry him, he’s an atheist. He doesn’t believe there is a hell.” Mother—“Go ahead and marry him, dear, and between us we’ll show him that he is wrong.” Book Agent (to farmer)—“You ought to buy an encyclopaedia now that your boy is going to school.” Farmer—“Not on your life—let him walk the same as I did.” Magistrate (to man in dock)—“You are acquitted.” Man in Dock—“Does that mean I have to give up the watch ?
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