West Side High School - Legenda Yearbook (Saginaw, MI)

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Kiss you? I should say not. Why, I don ' t even know your name. Pardon me, it ' s Izzo. Oh, that ' s different. Criterion item : Not long ago a heavy weight lifter lifted and held up four pianos. Earl Shaler: S ' nothin! A girl in our town lifted her skirts when she got on a car and held up nine street cars. Chuck: Are you fond of nuts? Edna : Is this a proposal ? He: What do you do in dramatics? She: Oh, I ' m the new stage-coach. What do you do? He : Oh, I ' m the fast mail. Father to daughter (after examining her expense account) : Do you think silk stock- ings are absolutely necessary? Anna Drensky: Certainly — up to a cer- tain point. Nan Bauer: I ' ll never trust any man in the dark. H. Snyder: It ' s a cinch you have nothing to fear in the day time. Flat: Ja hear about those cruel police- men? Foot: No, what ' d they do? Flat: Cut off a burglar ' s retreat. M. McGovern (over the phone) : Wanna go out for a ride? V. Schury: Is this party formal or in- formal? M. M.: Whadda ' ya mean? V. S. : Hair net — or no hair net? M. Theobald: Curly, why did you fall for me? C. Norton : Your line was just long enough to trip me. M. Budde: kiss me? C. Johnson : least resistance. Why do all the men want to Oh men follow the line of Pinkey: Yes, I was a Freshman once; some of the happiest years of my life were spent as a Freshman. Lip-stick: What do you mean she has teeth like the stars? Hair-oil : They come out at night. Ardussi (having hard time with tuning fork) : This thing ' s no good. Mr. Polsen : Take it back to the farm and get one with a better pitch to it. Tunes on Nothing at All Some authors write of the age of Jazz Condemn its folk and flasks; While others hand social affairs the razz, And rip off society ' s masks. Then some say the government ' s going to sot, And politics are a pest. That all our laws are a lot of rot, And the Bolshevik system is the best. I too, some nasty cracks and wise. About this earthly flock, Would pass. Alas, those other guys Have left me nought to knock. Did happier things exist (they don ' t) With them I ' d have m y fling. But they do not, and sc I won ' t Attempt to write a thing. E. Appelby: The only men I kiss are my brothers. A. Grigg: What fraternity do you belong to? How doth the gentle laundress Search out the weakest joints And always tear the buttons off At most strategic points? Ashes to ashes Dust to dust If Geometry don ' t kill us Trigonometry must. By a Junior. I wish I were a Senior and could with the Seniors stand, With a fountain pen behind my ear and a notebook in my hand. I wouldn ' t be an emperor, I wouldn ' t be a king, I wouldn ' t be an angel For angels have to sing. I ' d rather be a Senior and never do a thing. There was a hefty bold Who came from toity-toid A goil had he Who flung, did she, A wicked adenoid. A peach came walking down the street; She was more than passing fair; A smile, a nod, a half-closed eye, And the peach became a pair. A lovely girl was Mary Jane, She got all wet out in the rain. Her dress so thin Clung to her skin There ain ' t no loss without a gain. He failed in Physics, flunked in Chem. They heard him softly hiss, — I ' d like to catch the guy who said That ignorance is bliss.

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i m m 4?i Teacher: Ikey, give me a sentence con- taining the word ' statute. ' Ikey: Father came home late last night, and mother said, ' is dat you Ikey? ' Chuck: Has your fortune eveir been told? Edna: No, but I dare say papa will tell yours if you really have serious intentions. Miss A. Boyle: Oh, Mr. Bassett, tell me how they m ' ake an end run. Smiley: They step on his heels if he doesn ' t Jazz Class Gave Her Permanent Wiggle She learnt the fox trot one step too — And with the tango took a chance But oh, she met her Waterloo At the St. Vitus Dance. K. Schurr: Hey Mickey, can you lend me five? Mick McGovern: Sure, got change for a dime? Joe Schmiegel (as canoe rocks) Don ' t be afraid, we ' re only ten feet from land. She (anyone) where is it? Joe : Underneath us. Burrows: She asked me to kiss on either cheek. ' ' Nan B. Which one did you kiss her on? Roz : I hesitated a long time between them. Sun : Ran across Jim downtown yester- day. Set: Yeah, how was he? Sun : Tough, I only cracked two ribs and bent the axle. M. Hinkley : Alger kissed me last night. Mother (indignantly) That is outrageous, did you sit on him? Mary: I did. Dentist: Awfully sorry, miss but I just tore out a piece of your gum. Stenographer: That ' s all right. Just stick it under the chair and I ' ll get it as I go out. C. Norton: Doesn ' t that girl look like Helen Brown? I. Izzo: Yes, but she looks worse in white. Mr. Haggard: Haven ' t you any trade? What did you do before you got into this awful condition? J. Needham: I ' m a season worker, sir, my profession was smoking glasses for eclip • es of the sun. 8i SiSiSSSSiSS H. Booth : Do you believe in clubs for women? F. Galarno : You bet, clubs, sandbags, or any old thing. Please Don ' t Laugh B. Reins (in theatre) : Mother, when do the Indians come in? Mrs. R. : Why, there are no Indians in this show. Bobby: Well then, who scalped all the men in the front row? Mertz : Listen to that motor. It runs like a Packard, doesn ' t it? Murray: What did you do to it? Mertz: Put some monkey glands in the gasoline. Will Dembinske : Did you ever see a rab- bit with a tin ear? Pinkey: No, did you? Will: Sure, in a shooting gallery. Miss D. Boyle: Have you ' Simon Called Peter ' ? Carney Palmer: Sorry, we are out of that just now. Miss Boyle: Well, suggest some other stimulating piece of New Testament fiction. Very Good. Miss Clark: Give me a good example of a concidence. K. Schurr: My father and mother were married the same day. Say there, black man, can ' t you play honest? Ah, knows what cards ah done dealt you! G. Karow : What ' s showing at the movies tonight? B. Kissell: I ' m not quite sure, but I hear she wears only some beads. Mrs. Eskimo: Where have you been for the last six months? Mr. Esk. I sat up all night with a sick friend. Mr. Maynard : I see by the gasoline tank that you didn ' t get far last night? Son Tracy: Well father, I ' m not com- plaining any. This is entirely a matter of course, said the golfer as he approached the tee. Silver Dersch: What the difference be- tween Ammonium and ammonia? Freddie Bliss: One is the smell of the other.

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Thanks. Blesings on thee, little dame, Barebacked girl with knees the same; With thy turned down silken hose And thy thin, transparent clothes; With thy red lips reddened more, Smeared with lipstick from the store; With thy make-up on thy face And thy bobbed hair ' s jaunty grace. From my heart I give thee joy. Glad that I was born a boy! — W. P. Roby In the days of old When men were bold. And Fords were not invented; You walked your lass, O ' er blades of grass. And went along contented. Nowadays Proverbs George Dice — A fool and his high school are soon parted. Hank Snyder — Handsome is as long as handsome doesn ' t. Dot Brock — The wind bloweth, and the wind ceaseth, but the she casseth never. W. W. — Whom the teacher loveth, he chasteneth, and he loveth many. R. Burrows — He who sneaked his best friend ' s woman, committeth an abomination in the eyes of his best friend. Mickey M. — Rolling the bones gathers no moss. Al Comstock — Never put off for tomorrow what you can miss today. Bill Dembinsky — He who loves and runs away, loves another the next day. I Wonder What would you think of a girl who told you that the only chance you had of kissing her was to catch her when her mouth was closed; and then have her sit there the rest of the evening without saying a word. Mrs. Ho.: Well, what did your caller talk about last night? Daughter Ruthie: Kith and kin. . Small Brother: That ' s right. He said, ' May I kith you, ' and you said, ' yes, you kin ' . Why I Come to School To get more sleep Hank Snyder To get out of doing dishes . . . Esther Appelby To tease the girls Bill Kessel Nothing else to do . . . . Don Dankert To see Chuck Edna Alderson To teach the girls how to fix their hair. M. Theobald To teach the students how to yell. . D. Brown To show off my new dresses B. Reins To advertise Brillantine . , . .Al. Comstock To amuse the boys M. Hinkley To get the latest styles N. Bauer To get acquainted L. Speath To learn Hugh Bloomfield To play football The Team To give E ' s The Teachers To give blue slips Mr. Haggard To clean up Old Jerry himself A. Grigg: Barber, how long will I have to wait for a shave? Barber (looking at him closely) : Oh about two years. M. Meyer (reading history composition comparing Grant and Lee) : Lee always dressed in a neat Confederate uniform, but Grant was dressed only in a ragged old Union suit. M. MacDonald: My ancestors came over in the Mayflower. M. LaFleur: It ' s lucky they did, the im- migration laws are a little stricter now. R. Hannum: Why do you call that girl a dumbbell? T. Maynard: I kissed her once and she never told. L. Eynon: Do you approve of the Vol- stead Act? Mr. Haggard : Well, er-no, I never enjoy vaudeville. An average woman gets off a joke about as successful as she gets off a jitney buss. B. Ross: L. Hunt : have to. Let ' s kiss ?nd make up. Well, if you are careful I won ' t Miss Vanderhoof: Give a definition of density. R. Burrows: I can ' t give the definition but I can give an illustration. Miss V. : The illustration is good, take your seat. Mr. Haggard : I had to flunk you in the test. Do you know why? Bill Dembinski: I haven ' t an idea. Mr. Haggard: Just exactly. Is your husband a good provider, Dinah? Yessum, he ' s a good providah all right, but I ' se alius skeered dat niggah ' s gwine er get caught at it. Miss Sickels: Are you sure you ' re quali fied to lead a jazz orchestra? J. Lewis: Absolutely, I had two nervous breakdowns, was shell-shocked in France, and I live in a flat over a family of 14 children.