West Side High School - Legenda Yearbook (Saginaw, MI)

Page 122 text:

HUSBANDS ORGANIZE PROTECTIVE SOCIETY MAN ATTACKED BY FEROCIOUS BEAST First Step Taken To Abolish Midnight Pocket Pilfering. Savannah. — A new society has been organ- ized in Savannah under the name of the Anti-Pilfering League. Husbands came from near and far to enroll in the club, among them being such distinguished citizens as Mayor Benson of Little Rock, Leland Walker, Im- perial Wizard Curott of a New York secret society, and the Rt. Rev. Francis Pitts. At the initial meeting of the order, resolu- tions were adopted, the essence of which were as follows: That the members of this association had bound themselves together in an effort to prevent their wives from midnight pocket pilfering. The interest of the session was brought to a humorous climax when Rev. Pitts stated that his wife had found a pair of dice and matches in his pockets. The Gazette warns Mr. Pitts against carry- ing dice in his pockets as this is a dangerous practice, especially since the founding of the Society for the Extermination of Crap Shoot- ers. C. McDonald: What I want to know is, am I a bass or baritone? Miss Sickles: No, you ' re not Senior reciting Milton ' s Sonnet on His Blindness : They also serve who only sit and rest. STEEPLE JACK FALLS FROM FLAG POLE Breaks Contract Alfred Navarro, famous steeplejack and daredevil entertainer, fell from a flagpole on top of a building, here today, and broke his contract. Navarro had been engaged by the Metropolitan Entertainment Company to per- form, the contract reading that if any acci- dent occurs in which party of the second part fails to act as heretofore stated, the validity of this contract will be questionable. Navarro fell from the flagpole, and light- ed in an awning seven stories below. He broke his contract. They ' ll have chipped beef at the Greeks tonight, observed the fat carpenter, as he fell on the buzz saw. Compton Narrowly Escapes Injury Freeport, Illinois. — Hugo Compton, a farm- er living seven miles south of Freeport, nar- rowly escaped serious injury and possibly death, Friday night when a ferocious mule, owned by a neighboring farmer, broke through the hedge fence and charged down upon him. Compton, realizing his danger, fled across a corn field, with the infuriated beast in hot pursuit. Cy Shumaker, sheriff of Williams county, happened along, and the noise from the motor of his Crow-Elkhai ' t so frightened the mule that it died from shock a few mo- ments later. There ' s health in every drop, said the steeple-jack as the rope broke. ENGINEERS CONVENE AT CLEVELAND President Bloomfield of the National Asso- ciation of Engineers, threw open the doors of Cleveland to the throngs who are to take part in the coming convention, at the Hotel Cleve- land. Ray Blackstone, M. S., will give a talk on his recent engineering feat, that of moving a skyscraper, while Hugh Bloomfield will ad- dress the audience on his dredging of the Amazon, also the construction of the Swan Creek Municipal Pier. MICHIGAN MY MICHIGAN Home of my heart, I sing to thee Michigan my Michigan, A colder land there ne ' er could be, Michigan my Michigan. Nine dreary months of snow and sleet; We limp around with frozen feet, Yer derned old climate can ' t be beat, Michigan my Michigan. Your loyal sons will ne ' er forget Michigan my Michigan ; This year ' s the coldest winter yet, Michigan my Michigan. Your cold winds howl around our knees. We poke the fire and sit and freeze O ! what ' s the use of B. V. D. ' s In Michigan my Michigan. Ray Blackstone ' 23.

Page 121 text:

EXTRA ! EXTRA ! EXTRA ! NOTED MEDICINE MAN ON TOUR SOAP BOX ORATOR AR- RESTED IN MOSCOW Everett Winslow while delivering a stirring oration from a Fels Naphtha Soap box was accosted by Nicholas Mangutz, head of the Imperial Police force on a charge of conspir- acy against the government. He will be ar- raigned before Czar Cronk. ORCHESTRA COMPLETES ENGAGEMENT MacDonald ' s Famous Black and Blue Or- chestra leaves tonight for Saint Charles, after playing for seven weeks at the Hotel Schuch. In Saint Charles they will play in the Idlewild Inn, at the Banquet of the deaf sailors. LEWIS ' STUPENDOUS THREE RING CIRCUS ARRIVES AT ATLANTA Lewis ' three ring circus and menagerie ar- rived in Atlanta early this morning, prepara- tory to the big performance at the fair grounds this afternoon. The circus brings with it, Harold Doering, leader of the famous Lewis Shows Band; Florence Roeser, bare- back rider extraordinary, and Harold Mertz, comedian. Mr. Mertz ' s wise cracks have de- lighted thousands in the show ' s recent tour of the east, and spectators should lend him their ears. Aside from these head-liners, the Lewis Shows boast of lion trainers of mean ability, for Milton Schiff and Gilbert Scheib shake wicked whips. BROCK ELECTED PRESIDENT Saginaw, Michigan — At a meeting of the Susie Sapp Sewing Circle, Miss Dorothy Brock was elected to the office of president to suc- ceed Miss Viola Schury, whose wedding to King Mack McGovern of Tahiti took place last week. Abe Oserowsky, formulator of Lizard and Vegetable Oil, is touring the United States, selling his precious oils to the people, leaving after him scores of convalescents. The oil is good for man or beast, and Oserowsky has met with great success on his latest tour. KING OF MAGICIANS COMING TO STOCKHOLM Byron Slocum, most clever of magicians, will be at the Rivoli theatre for eight days, beginning Tuesday. Mr. Slocum has with him an able assist- ant, and promises many stunts that will be both dumb-founding and entertaining. NAVAL BATTLE WAGES OFF THE SWISS COAST Reikjavik, Iceland. — Admiral Krutz of the Swiss navy, and Rear Admiral Smith of the Uruguay fleet, were engaged in fierce combat off the coast of Switzerland this morn- ing. Krutz had scored two direct hits accord- ing to radio messages picked up at Reikjavik, Iceland. STORMY BATTLE WAGES IN SENATE After hours of firey debate, which has cen- tered around Senators Merril McDonald and Munson, it is believed by such strong lobby- ists as Arduino Ardussi, head of the Radio Association, and Victor Cole, chief farmers ' lobbyist, that a bill to provide for a bounty on cooties would pass the Senate by a small majority. DOWNTOWN RESTAURANT BURNED St. Louis, Mo. — (Special to the Gazette.) — Fire believed to have started from hot dogs in the basement of an adjoining red hot stand crept through the fire wall and totally de- stroyed the Hash Foundry, one of St. Louis ' most popular stag restaurants. The business was owned by Howard Mc- Intyre. The loss is covered by insurance.

Page 123 text:

states of the Unite, Feb. the tenth. Dear Friend: Now I take my pen and ink in hand and write you with a lead pencil. Ve do not lif ver ve used to live, ve lif ver ve haf moved. I hate to say it but your dear old ant vot you luffed so much iss dead. She died of Ne. Monia on New Years day in New Orleans at fifteen minutes in front of five. Some people think she had population of der heart; the doctor g-ave up all hopes of a family for two boys and two cows. They found $10,000 sewed up in her bustle. It was an auful lot to leave be- hind. She villed it all to the boys, in case they die, the fortune goes to the cows. Old Mrs. Offenbach is very sick, she is just about at deaths door. The doctor tinks he can pull her through. She has such a nice little boy, he is just like a human beast. Your brudder Gus took our dog Fido down to the saw mill yesterday to had a fight. He run up against one of the circular saws, he only lasted one round. All of the Grosenbachs family had the mumps and are having a swell time. I am sending you your black overcoat by express, in order to save extra charges, I cut off the buttons. You ' ll find them in the inside pocket. Mother is making sausage, the neighbors are all looking for their dogs. Your uncle says if you don ' t pay him them 40c you owe him he ' ll cut off your head and throw it in your face. We sent Hulda over to the butcher to see if he had some pigs feet, she came back and said she didn ' t know, the butcher had his shoes on. I just graduated from Arthur Hill. I took up electrution and physical torture. I learned to be a stenogra- pher. I got a job in a livery stable taking de hay for the horses. Louis vas sick, the doctor told him to take someding, he vent down the street and met Ikey Cohen and took his watch. Ikey had him arrested and got a lawyer. The lawyer got the case but Louis got the works. Lena vent out to milk der cows, the cow kicked her and gave her milk punch. The flat was cold last week, father called the janiter a lobster and he made it hot for him. He vas as cold as a vol- cano. Ve haf thirty chickens and pug dog. The chickens lay around six eggs a day and the dog is laying behind the stove. Ve are having more weather up here than ve has last year. Just hear they performed an operation on Mrs. Offenbach between the dining room and the conservatory but she died between eight oclock. Der iss lots of people dying around here vot nefer died before. How I wish we were closer apart, I am auful lonesome since we were separationnate together. Your brud- der Lehan is getting along fine with the small pox and I hope you are the same. Hoping that you write sooner than I did, I remain your friend, Joe Schmeigel. P. S. If you don ' t get my letter let me know and I will write you anudder. P. S. S. Two times — Just received that $5.00 I owe you but have closed the letter and can ' t get it in. (Letter from Jo. Schmiegal to Ray Hart.) MY AUTO ' TIS OF THEE. My auto ' tis of thee, Short road to poverty, Of thee I chant. I blew a pile of dough. On you three years ago ; Now you refuse to go. Or won ' t or can ' t. Through town and country side, You were my joy and pride, A happy day. I loved the gaudy hue. The nice white tires, new. But you ' re down and out for true. In every way. To thee old rattlebox. Come many bumps and knocks, For thee I grieve. Badly the top is torn, Frayed are the seats and worn; The whooping cough affects thy horn, I do believe. Thy perfume swells the breeze. While good folks choke and wheeze, As we pass by. I paid for thee a price, ' Twould buy a mansion twice. Now everybody ' s yelling ice. Thy motor has the grip. The spark plug has the pip, And who is thine. I, too, have suffered chills. Fatigue and kindred ills. Endeavoring to pay my bills. Since thou wert mine. Gone is my bank roll now, No more ' twould choke a cow, As once before. Yet, if I had the mon, So help me, John, amen, I ' d buy a car again. And speed some more. F. GALARNO I know a guy so dumb that he thinks that musicians eat piano rolls for breakfast.