West Salem High School - Neshonoc Yearbook (West Salem, WI)

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Last night I held a litle hand. So dainty and so sweet; I thought my heart would surely break So wildly it did beat. No other hand in all the world Can greater solace bring; Than the sweet hand I held the other night, Four aces and a king. —Vernon Friell. God moves in mysterious ways But the army has bent His will, To prove my point we'll take the case Of Pvt. Wilbur (Bill). Bill joined up with his Uncle Sam. 'Twas just a year ago They sent him straight to Scott field To studio radio. He started school with Pvt. Friell, An egocentric lout; But just two weeks thereafter Poor Pvt. Friell washed out. Bill learned his code and theory, too. When marching looked so real; So help him God, he'd not flunk out, Like poor Pfc. Friell. Four months have passed in this sad tale, He never does get razzed; He knows now that he will not fail Like poor Corp. Frazze. Now Pvt. Bill is out of school. He's learned it all now really. He's thankful that he made the grade Unlike poor Sergt. Frielly. Pvt. Bill now pounds a key. In the land where all is burnin'; While in St. Louis at the USO, Sits poor Staff Sergt. Vernon. Sophomore Boy: What's that gurgling noise I hear? Senior Girl: That's me, trying to swallow your line. RATION William L. Shirer, the news commentator and author of Berlin Diary, was in a grocery store at the Connecticut village where he lives, and heard a woman ask the clerk for a can of dog food. The clerk told her that there was none in stock because of the government order prohibiting the canning of dog food. The woman was loud in her complaint. Look, lady, Shirer told her, here in America we've stopped canning dog meat because we're almost out of tin. But in Germany they stopped because they're all out of dogs. Mary: What's wrong with a man asking you if you can dance? Clarice: I was dancing with him when he asked me. Friell to Mr. Glasrud: If they take you in the army. I'm going to sell my bonds. The Seniors were talking about their pictures when yours truly overhead: Mary Ellen: Isn't that a terrible picture of me? I look just like a monkey. Bud: You should have thought about that before you had it taken. Colleen: Cal, is everything shut up for the night? Cal: That all depends on you, dear. Everyhing else is. Page twenty-five

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CAN YOU IMAGINE? James Stull growing up. Mary Ann Cook fat. Joyce Knudson sitting still. Lois Thompson not singing. Dave Syvertson with his own cigarette. Calvin Flaig talking slowly. Mary Ellyn Hetland staying mad. Bud Knudson not making wisecracks. Mary Wolter without her gum. Miss Baertsch never winking. Verda Horstman looking sweet. Wilbur Selbrede going steady. Todd McEldowney without a girl. Colleen Flaig not giggling. Gerry Gilbertson at school every day. June Johnson talking loud. Walter Olson knowing an answer. Betty Hetland being still. Mr. Knudtson taking his time. Norman Eickhoff as a soda-jerker. Evelyn Wege never smiling. Miss Bush grouchy. Vernon Friell without a coke. Beverly Sprain without her apple sauce and pancakes. INSEPARABLES— Joyce Wilcox and her candy. Bruce and his Chevie. Stooge and his briefcase. Kato and his weeds. Gerry Gilbertson and Bangor. Mr. Glasrud and his lectures. Marion Wehrenberg and her gum. Teacher: I asked you to write about the funniest thing you ever saw. Why have you handed in this blank paper? Jerry Gilbertson: The funniest thing I ever saw was too funny for words. Butch: I feel like telling that teacher off again. Moe: Whaddya mean—again? Butch: I felt the same way yesterday. Bruce: Stooge, what time is it? Bob Twining: I don't know. Times got so hard we had to lay off a hand. Dr. Baltz: What kind of filling do you want in your tooth, Vernon? Friell: Chocolate. Marlin Modes was not only chewing gum, which was against the rules, but he had his feet in the aisle. Marlin, the teacher thundered, take the gum out of your mouth and put your feet in. Moxie: I was hit by a car last week and knocked senseless. Mr. Glasrud: When do you expect to recover? Jim Stull: The horn on your car must be broken. Bruce: No, it's just indifferent. Jim: Indifferent! What do you mean? Bruce: It just doesn't give a hoot. Farmer (2-C) Bouska: Heard about the new method of threshing wheat? Farmer Albers: No, what? Farmer Bouska: Put a high-school jitterbug in the middle of the field, turn on a Benny Goodman record, and he can thresh three acres in three minutes. The MP is my protector; I shall not stray. He maketh me to abide by military law; he returneth me to camp; he restoreth my property; he leadeth me in the path of righteousness for my own sake. Yea, though I w;alk through a red light, I will fear no evil, for they are with me. Their brassards and their guns, they comfort me. They preparest a guard before me in the presence ot mine enemies; they hold me with a steady hand when my cup runneth over. Surely army regulations shall direct me all my days here at camp; or I shall dwell in the guardhouse forever. WHO'S WHO Description Pastime Nickname Man of sophomore class Inky Studious Teaching Sunday School Bev. Breezy House parties Speed Stubborn Polly Suck Dizzy blonde Eating caramels Fifi Page twenty-jour

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SIGNS OF THE TIMES HUMOR In a La Crosse restaurant: Please don't insult our waiters. Customers we can get. We have plenty of coffee. 5c first cup; $1.00 second cup. In a barber shop in a Boom town: Come in and we will give you an estimate on your haircut. Under a flag: These colors don't run. GERMAN ARITHMETIC 1 German—10 uncultured foreigners. 2 soldiers—10 civilians. 3 officers—12 privates. 4 treaties—8 scraps of paper. 5 poisoned wells—1 strategic retreat. 6 iron crosses—1 ruined cathedral. 7 zeppelin raids—7 demonstrations of frightfulness. 8 eggs—8 hearty meals (common people). 9 eggs—1 appetizer (aristocracy). 10 deported Belgians—10 unmarked graves. 11 torpedoed neutrals—11 disavowals. LOCAL (LOCO) MORONS Tootsie took two quarters to bed with her so she would have sleeping quarters. Todd took cream and sugar to the show. He thought it was a serial. Dave took a tape measure to bed to see how long he slept. Smitty took a bale of hay to bed so he could feed his nightmare. Clarice stood on the corner with bread and butter in her hand waiting for the traffic jam. Verda put bread crumbs in her shoes to feed her pigeon toes. Kato took a hammer to bed to hit the hay. Evelyn thought Rudy Vallee was a place between two hills. Wilbur went on the roof because he thought the drinks were on the house. Mr. Glasrud: If I stood on my head, the blood would rush to it and make my face red. Why doesn't the blood rush to my feet when I'm standing up? Stooge: 'Cause your feet ain't empty. ONLY ONE THING FOR HIM Lorenzo stood gazing longingly at the nice things displayed in a haberdasher's window for a marked-down sale. A friend stopped to inquire if he was thinking of buying shirts or pajamas. Gosh, no, replied Lorenzo, the only thing that fits me ready-made is a handkerchief. WHY NOT? Bruce giggled when Mr. Glasrud read the story of a man who swam across the Tiber three times before breakfast. Mr. Glasrud: You don't doubt that a trained swimmer could do that, do you? Bruce: No, sir, but I wonder why he didn't make it four times and get back to the side where his clothes were. 4-F First Draftee: What did the little dog say when he ran through the fire? Second Draftee: I dunno. What? First Draftee: He said, 'Wheel I've just been defurred'. PROMOTION Mr. Knudtson: Have you heard from your brother in the army recently? Bruce: Oh, yes. He's been promoted for striking that unpleasant sergeant. He's going to be a court-martial! Betty Hetland: Mother, may I go swimming? Mrs. Hetland: No, dear, the water's too deep. Betty: But, mother. Tootsie is in the water. Mrs. Hetland: Yes, but Tootsie is insured. Page twenty-six