West High School - Hesperian Yearbook (Minneapolis, MN)

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THE HESPERIAN THE CONSERVATORY He is assisted in his work of making the travelers feel at home by two excellent hostesses who arc often more than anxious to have the passengers call upon them in their offices and present any of the many little troublesome matters which it may or may not be within their power to solve, but which they will solve regardless. An efficient office staff is maintained so highly organized that any person can be located at any hour of the day—at least, ‘tis known where the missing passenger is supposed to be. Certain other members of the general staff arc willing at a great personal sacrifice to see that the morals of the passengers arc not jeopardized; often, at the risk of their own reputations do they follow an erring traveler to some low dive on one of the land stops. Although their contracts call for no such personal sacrifice, they arc often courageous enough to wrest the recalcitrant one from the very lap of error. The chief steward and his stafT arc highly satisfactory, although it is often rather difficult to locate the staff members when they arc most needed. The chief engineer, however, may always be located near the ladies locker rooms during the lunch hour, where he is a great | ct and favorite of all the girls, being something of a humorist. Services to Passencers The West offers a fine reading room and two delightful little bookshops. In the former, the reader may feast his mind on such light reading as suits gay sea atmosphere in a comfortable, quiet, home-like room. The bookshops offer a place where the reader may browse at his leisure and ch x sc his favorite from a wide range of delightful and rare volumes. Hand concerts arc provided twice each morning from a central point so that the passenger need not come to the music, the music willy-nilly coming to him. The band offers stirring marches, and one is often able to pick out a distinct tune, it one I 6 1

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THE HESPERIAN PERSONNEL Mrs, Wilder, Chhf Ciirk; Mr. Greer. Principal; Mrs. Jacobsen: Mrs. Swanson: Miss Holt. Assistant Principal; Mrs. Ijockmrrtod, Vocational Adyislr; Miss Carlson: Miss Robertson. Public School Lines, Inc. THE Public School Lines, Inc. is pleased to take this opportunity of making public certain facts and fancies concerning the S. S. West, crack ship of the line. These disclosures arc guaranteed to make every eighth grader burn with impatience, and strain at the bit to be up anti away to higher education. They will make every loyal prospective graduate shed a bitter tear of regret, and will finally make every poor deluded soul who chose to go toward the goal of advanced learning by some oilier route green with envy and suppressed desire. In other words, the praises of the dear old dump arc about to be sounded in the key of which is simple and apt to be understood even by those without an car for music. General Information The ship sailed in September with a passenger list numbering over 2,000 while the membership increased with every port of call. The ship is a four-deck liner, offering ample accommodation, every room an outside room. The comfort of the passenger is jealously guarded and his slightest wishes catered to; in fact, the passenger often docs not need to express his desires at all: they arc taken for granted by the super-excellent staff. The Staff The ship is captained by John N. (Jrccr, veteran of many voyages and experienced in handling all difficulties raised by the tourists in a gentle and efficient manner. I 5 J

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THE HESPERIAN THE LIBRARY has an car for music. The orchestra features special modern arrangements of such touching ditties as “My Hero. Another exclusive feature is the language classes in which the passenger is taught foreign tongues to such a degree of conversational perfection that upon his arrival on foreign shores the natives are often able to discern that he is speaking their native jargon. Certain useful phrases arc memorized, such as “John, shall we go shopping? “Waiter, bring me some tea,” and “Have you seen the Follies yet?” The spacious conservatory provides a rare retreat to those “friends of our native landscape” who never feel quite at home when more than two miles from the great open spaces. There the lover of the great outd x rs may learn such useful bits of nature lore as how to tell a cactus from a velvet plant without making the sitting test. Special Services An innovation, designed to keep the male element engaged in some useful occupation. is the cooking class, where the embryo chefs prepare delicacies that arc quite beyond the imagination. Because of the efficient first-aid corps in connection, it is the boast of the department that there has not been one casualty, the most serious disorders being cold sores from eating grapefruit, and acute indigestion from fudge. Strictly private telephone communication is maintained with the great outside world and the passenger is able to converse with anyone and be assured of a quiet, strictly private conversation without any interruption. Indeed, some suites are provided with private phones, the lines being opened at the option of the general office. This is, of course, very rare. Connections with land may also be made by cable with sj ecial rates for standardized messages such as “Send me more money and “Come home at once, the dog :n