West High School - Hesperian Yearbook (Minneapolis, MN)

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 The Smallest Freshie (l y a Mightjf Sophomore) Vw HBN the smallest Freshman first approached the imposing High School, ■ hc was completely overwhelmed with awe and wonder because of the | immensity of the building. Gradually, however, as he toiled up the broad entrance steps, this feeling gave place to one of quite another kind. A vast spirit of importance and pride entered the mind of The Smallest Freshman as he realized that now he was about to become a member of this great place, and in his own opinion, one of no little importance. Tt is very true that this doubtless would have happened if The Smallest Freshman had not had the horrible misfortune to drop his lunch bag just as he reached the first floor. To his great dismay, three ham sandwiches and two very large pickles rolled out in shameful prominence and then began his series of mishaps. At once a dozen huge individuals bore down upon this awkwardly placed hero with words of seniorly reproach. As he stood there, the unwilling center of the group, The Smallest Freshman eyeing these enormous creatures, reckoned with consternation that he must be facing the principal of the school, and some of his aiding assistants. As he shrank back in mortal fear of these persons whose vast importance signified eminence, one particularly august and stern, began to talk in a terrifying manner. “Since you have deliberately committed this fearful crime in view of myself and my Honored Companions, you are compelled to pay this penalty. ’ Here he was forced to pause and cough violently. The Smallest Freshman wondered why. It also puzzled him that the Honored Companions were all very red in the face and seemed to have trouble to keep their shoulders still. Perhaps it was that they were very sorry for him. “And so.” concluded the speaker, “every time today that you meet one of my Honored Companions, you are to bow very low. without fail, in deep reverence. See ?’ ’ The Smallest Freshman closed his eyes and drew a long breath of relief. Evidently the principal was not so very terrible after all. He was so concerned with this idea that he did not notice the dispersing of the delighted seniors until they had drawn far away. He wondered why the Honored Companions had departed so suddenly. It was now that he noticed another iinpor- —12 — y M

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2y The Freshie (With due apologies to II. W. Longfellow's “ Village Blacksmith ”) Under a spreading chestnut tree, The small freshie stands. The freshie, a tiny man is he, With small and dinky hands; And the muscles on his bony arms Are strong as rubber bands. II Ilis hair is tough, uncombed and long, 11 is face unlike a man. Ilis hair is wet with studious (?) sweat, lie learns whate'er lie can. And stares the whole school in the face, For he knows not any man. 8S I ! — ll — I

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I taut looking individual, The Person with the dark beard and glasses, who, although he did not know it. had been the cause of the Honored Companions’ going away. Judging him to Ik one of the Honored, and obeying his recent command, The Smallest Freshman approached That Person and bowed low before him. A gleam of amusement lighted the eye of That Person, and The Smallest Freshman, seeing it. was startled into running in the opposite diroe tion. Through the whole of that weary and revealing day, he bowed to each of the Honored Companions with ceremony. He vaguely wondered why so many people grinned as he did this. The fact that no one else seemed to bow also puzzled him. but he was fast learning that in the world of the High School, one did as he was told, not as he wished. It was after he had bowed for the thirtieth time to That Person, whom, by tin way. he seemed to meet often, that The Smallest Freshman received a great shock, lie found now that snickering crowds followed him about, becoming convulsed whenever he bowed. Finally, The Friendly Junior arose to the occasion and stopped him. “Kid.” said the newcomer, “who put you up to that stunt? Why do you do that? You’re making a perfect fool of yourself. Can’t you see that no one else does it?” Gasping with astonishment. The Smallest Freshman poured out the tale of his lunch, the Honored Companions, and their orders. When he finished. The Friendly Junior was laughing so hard that he found it difficult to speak Then, after much explanation, he convinced the forlorn object of the seniors’ ridicule that the Honored Companions were not the faculty, but merely some mischief-loving students. “And now, kid,” he concluded, “my advice is this: When you next see one of those fresh seniors, you tell 'em what you think of ’em, and cut out tic bowin’!” Crestfallen, yet filled with anger. The Smallest Freshman departed. Turning a sudden corner, he abruptly came face to face with That Person, of the dark beard and glasses. Looking That Person squarely in the eye. The Smallest Freshman burst into a torrent of words. “You’re a great big fraud! You’re no more of the faculty than I am! I’ll never bow to you again! You ought to 1m ashamed of yourself for so— so—” The Smallest Freshman paused to get a strong enough word, “so violently abusing my rights! Sec if I don’t get even with you!” At the end of this harangue, leaving That Person rooted to tin ground as if he were stunned, The Smallest Freshman ran down the long hall, frightened to death at what he had done. To his joy. he met The Friendly Junior, and poured out his second tale, pointing at That Person with an accusing finger. The Friendly Junior gave one glance at That Person and uttered a horrified groan. Then grasping him by the shoulder, while The Smallest Freshman grew hot and cold by turns, he spoke. “Kid,” said The Friendly Junior, ‘that’s Mr. Jordan himself, the principal of the school.” —Louise Hruckmoez, Sophomore. —13 —