Wells High School - Crimson and Gray Yearbook (Southbridge, MA)

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14 THE CRIMSON AND (JUAY Heard about the Freshman Reception: A delirous lunch was served ! A girl, a quarrel, A room, some gas, A hearse, a funeral, A hole, some grass ' Sail over. Say Red what ' s the best way to teach a girl to swim ? Red — That ' s a cinch. First off, put your left arm under her waist and then gently take her left hand — Edmonds — Come off; she ' s my sister. Fed — Aw, push her off the dock. Mies Marshall — Pass without talking. Pupil — Can ' t we take it with us ? Tabor Hughes PagE LIzotte PotteR Clarke Apte DcgRenier CurtiS THE T. R. T. 0. BUNCH Weatherhead Pratt Page Apte Surprenant Harris Hughes Wixted L. Proulx McMaster Tabor — I ' d like to get this poem pub- lished. I ' ve sent it in to a dozen editors, but is is of no use. Small You might put it in an envelope, leave it on your desk and then commit su- icide. All the papers would have it in the next day. Home Brew, the world champion water drinker. Rodney Plimpton, Caesar ' s ghost Hilda Aalto, famous ex-prodigy. Doris Wheeler, on her Latin pony. Raymond Allard, would-be famous female vamp. Charles Hall, French Class Pet ( ?) Miss Wililams, Miss Campbell ' s private secretary. 1925 The English Class was discussing His- tory. Now, Miss Shearer, Miss O ' Keefe said Mary followed Edward VI, didn ' t she? Yes, replied Blanche. And now who followed Mary? All was silent for a moment, then — Her lamb, answered Blanche calmly. Where were you yesterday, Charles Tessier? asked Miss Crocker. Please, mum, I had a toothache. Has it stopped aching? I don ' t know, replied Charlie. What do you mean, boy, you don ' t know if your toothh has stopped aching? No, mum, the dentist kept it. If I cut a beefsteak in two, asked Miss Crocker, and then cut the halves in two what do I get? Quarters returned Tessier. Good. And then again? Eighths. Correct. Again? Sixteenths Exactly. And what then? Thirty-seconds. And once more? Hash ! cried Tessier. 1924 Mr. Clement — Are there any English de- rivatives from the noun pater? R. Allard— Er— Pat. Dot White has surprised us all and tak- en the fatal step. The lucky man is Mr. Kenneth Raison. Dot is living in Mil waukee but promises to come and see us during the Christmas Holidays.

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THK CRIMSON AND GRAY 18 DurGin POeton Surpren.: it RiehardS Currln DuPaul McMaSter 192.3 OUR FRIEND ' THE COP Mine beloved friend each noon and night Stands in 1 1 ire quite sprite He looks like the R ek of Gibraltar Directing the vho falter. He has one .good, qu xlity — -that ' s his sight My Gosh! he sees all right! (wrong) Anyone, anytime, anywhere it does not matter He will signal to ' top ' er But believe me he can ' t alter The fact that we fan step-on ' er When he ' s out of our sight. POPULAR CARS Green ' s Steady-bres ker Tabor ' s Flivver Page ' s Blu ' ick Hughes ' Acts-well Apte ' s Hey-e Lizzotte ' s Essence cf Joy (Studebaker) (Ford) (Buick) (Maxwwell) (Haynes) (Essex) ! ! BEWARE ! ! Know them by their speech — Mr. Gibbons— Didn ' t I tell you? Miss Crocker — Dontch ' see Miss O ' Keefe— Don ' t be facetious Miss Campbell— Please desist Mr. Clement— Ah, (5 minutes) Well Miss Marshall — I suppose so — Miss Aucoin— Let ' s inhibit Miss Jones — Oh dean Brew BRadley ] [zdtte WhaLcn ALlard Benolt • CormAck GreeN D. Tabor HugheS FPESHMEN The Bonin Kane ' s Power ' s the Fountaine of the Park (er) which the Rich Ser-let-to Han (d) son Montague in which to Shear (er) his Lyon. Little Willie Green had just been to his first football game and had been impressed very much by the cheering. Now he was saying his prayer — God bless mama, God bless papa God bless Willie, Boom ! Rah Rah ! ! Question — Why is Red Potter like a donkey. Answer — Because he looks like one. To the banks of the darkling river Where the fitful fireflies quiver And the tall, thin aspens shiver Came a man and a maid in a flivver. L. L. C. The young man led for a heart The maid for a diamond played The old man came in with a club And the sexton used a spade. Nothing can be lasting when the reason does not rule. If you cannot make a big sale make a small one and be glad of the chance. When Omar smote his bloomin ' lyre, He ' d heard men sing by land and sea, And what he thought he might require He went and took the same as me. When a man has not a good reason for doing a thing, he has one good reason for letting it alone. POOR, FRAIL LITTLE GIRL She could swing a six-pound dumb bell, She could fence and she could box; She could row upon the river, She could clamber ' mong the rocks; She could golf from morn till evening And play tennis all day long; But she couldn ' t help her mother ' Cause she wasn ' t very strong. Teacher — Good morning Clarke. Are you at the Lake now? Clarke (politely) — Yes mam; we ' re at the Lake. Drop in some time when you ' re going by. (Who was the teacher?) Lawry, said the teacher, give me a sentence containing ' notwithstanding. ' And Lawry answered, The man ' s trous- ers were worn out but notwithstanding.

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PICK UPE Time Is Too slow for those who Wail Too swift for those who Fear Too long for those who Grieve Too short for those who Rejoice But for those who Love Time is not Reading maketh a full man; conference a ready man, and writing an exact man ; and, therefore; if a man write a little he had need of a great memory; if he confer little he had need have a present wit; and if he read little, he had neel have much cunning, to seem to know that he doth not Bacon We may build more splendid habitations Fill our rooms with painting and with sculptures, But we cannot Buy with gold the old associations ! Longfellow Death ' s stamp gives value to the coin of life; making it possible to buy with life what is truly precious. While the glass lamp rebukes the earth- en for calling it cousin, the moon rises and the glass lamp, with a bland smile, calls her, — My dear, dear sister. It is the little things I leave behind for my loved ones — great things are for ev- eryone.