Wayland Central School - Hi Lites Yearbook (Wayland, NY)

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The KICK-OFF 192-1 A few days ago I picked up the morning paper, as usual, to glance through it and note the items of interest. To my amazement the headlines on the front page read as follows: “Adah Weidman, Former Wayland Girl, Running For United States Senator.” A little later I was in New York city. I had nothing to do in the afternoon so I strolled down to the harbor and thought I would watch the ships come in. As I watched the passengers departing from a ship there was one young lady among them whom I recognized. Tt was Josephine Lawrence, one of our most brilliant Seniors. She told me she had been touring abroad for two years in search of a “May” flower she liked better than Charlie, but none could be found. ‘‘SENIORS” Joe and Billy and Squash and Carp, Put that to music to try on your harp. Helen and Charlie and Art and Clare, ’Course those are names, but what do we care? Then Addie and Adah and Mike, all three, We’re not much to look at, but just wait and see. They just don’t realize, great ones they’re to lose But some day they’ll be glad to blacken our shoes. With our Shark and our loafer, our beauty and joke We’ll show Wayland High a bit of our smoke. The Juniors, they say, “Just wait ’till we’re you We’ll show you some tricks that you never knew.” But then we all know of what Juniors are made And we’ll sail gaily on, unhurt by their raid. He—“That man is the ugliest person I ever saw.” She—“Sh, you forget yourself.” Curious Freshman, Chemistry lab., Match in a vial, Marble slab. Prof, (in Physics class)—“Tub, please run up that shade.” Tub—“Guess I better not Prof. I’m afraid the string won’t hold me.” Customer—“I’d like to see a dress to wear around the house, please.” Salesman—“Yes, Ma’am, and what size is tin house?” “I beg your pardon,” said the lady collector timidly, “would you please help the Working Girls’ Home?” “Certainly,” answered Chuck, “but where are they?”

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The KICK-OFF 1924 learned that it was Goldena Bills,one of our most brilliant Seniors,who is now teaching French in New York city and piloting her own aeroplane. But listen! the saddest part is yet to be revealed to you. Her diamond ring was lost. Poor “Doc”! Someone will have to have appendicitis so Dad can buy another one. A strange city appeared before me which 1 later learned was Wayland. While 1 was viewing the skyscrapers something unusual caught my eye. Was that a man, standing on the ground washing windows on the second storyf Impossible! Being curious as always 1 advanced and—well, you probably all have guessed. It was Ward Carpenter. Wayland mysteriously vanished and Webster Crossing appear- ed exactly as it is now. Did 1 say exactly! No! Jessie McClarrie came down the street with a basket of groceries on her arm. What is she doing there! Oh! yes, teaching school to support her-----self. Knowing Jessie of old I thought she would know about our old classmates. Sure enough! Clark Wallace, our dear beloved president, had gone through college and was steadily advancing. He had taken a turn at chemistry and had discovered a liquid which when applied to human hair, makes it permanently straight. You would no longer know Clark without his marcel wave. Of Arthur Clearwater she wasn’t sure but thought he was still in Wayland. He had gained his heart’s desire and was now devoting himself more exclusively to his fiddle. Jessie said they had introduced movies in Webstcrs so we went in to the matinee. It was a very impressive show—Clare Maginley in “Her Blushing Beau.” Behold! A beautiful building appeared before me with a flight of stairs leading to the entrance. A large crowd of people were swarm- ing in and out and muttering, “Isn’t it beautiful, did you ever see any- thing so impressive!” My curiosity became greatly aroused so 1 join- ed the crowd to see what was attracting so much attention within. When 1 reached the interior I saw hanging on the wall the most wonder- ful picture I had ever seen. I will not attempt to describe it for words cannot express its beauty. At the bottom was written a familiar name, Helen Alpaugh, our class artist. Presently I found myself in a far distant land. Everything around was strange and so much different than anything I had ever seen. 1 noted a crowd of people gathered around a speaker standing upon a soap box delivering a lectine. As I neared the orator I recog- nized his voice. It was Charles May, the sheik of our Senior class try- ing to persuade the “Chinks” to have their hair bobbed. We wonder why he likes bobbed hair.

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The KICK-OFF 1924 Art—“Tlmt’s my car. The thief is just fixing a blowout.” Policeman—“All right, I’ll go over and arrest him.” Art—“Sh-h-h! Wait ti’l he gets the tire pumped up.” Might Leave Something Dedbroke (aroused by his wife)—“What’s that you say, a burg- lar?” Mrs. Dedbroke—“Yes, fancy a burglar calling on us!” Dedbroke—“Let him climb in, then I’ll give a yell and it may make him drop something lie has stolen elsewhere.” Elastic Capacity A chap, who was hiring a car for use over the week-end, after eliminating a lot of details in the transaction, inquired how many the car held. The native stroked his beard and scratched his head. “Well, she generally holds four, but seven can get along if they’re well ac- quainted.” Fresh—“Hay, Prof., how long could 1 live without brains?” Prof.—“That remains to he seen.” Woman can truly feel that a real emancipation is right at hand. Now that there is promise of her soon being able to go off to the movies and leave the electric bulb to sing the baby to sleep. How It Happened “It was the first time 1 had ever driven a car,” feebly explained the victim of the accident. “I got to going pretty fast and forgot how to stop. I saw a bridge rushing to meet me. I tried to turn out to let it pass and— that is all I know about it.” Mother—“I wouldn’t whip him this time, Robert. Wait till he does it again.” Father—“But suppose he doesn’t do it again?” Sheet Lightning Carp—“Why do you put your head under the pillow when it storms ? ’ ’ Blankley—“I am afraid of lightning.” Carp—“But if it can’t see your head it might spank you.” Bachelor Sentiment He—“Indeed,I am fond of children,particularly in the country.” She—“Why particularly when you are in the country?” He—“Not when I am in the country—when they are.”