Walt Whitman Junior High School - Pioneer Yearbook (Brooklyn, NY)

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nFine example you set your darling little boy: a grown man stealing a worthless plastic bankln shrieked Hawk-eye. nButU......tried to interject the darling's father. NBut nothing. There is no ex- cuse for it.n UI didn't steal it. My little boyooooooooeooooocoooou UOh you poor dear! To have such a father! He would rather incriminate you, his own flesh and blood, than take the blame for a petty theft. How your mother must sufferin With that bit of dramatics over, the very perceptive Hawk- eye clutched bewildered Donald to her side. By this time, one of the help had sent for the manager. How- ever, my father fared little better if not worse with him. In addition to having keen vision, thenarrestingn sales- woman also possessed the trust and respect of everyone connect- ed with the store. The more my father came to his own defense, the deeper he sank. What really clinched the accused criminal's disgraced fate was his telling the truth of the mat- ter. Sounds of shock and disgust came from the employees who had gathered to witness the inter- rogation. On two occasions the manager threatened to telephone the po- lice. Pleadingly he said to Donald: HTake good care of your father son. Don't let him do anything as foolish and as juvenile as this again.H A. 4 ' if ,ein 'M Wfffwu ig?5??g2,4QEE:5?PN RENEW Licking the lollipop which had been kindly and sympathetically given him, Donald stared with his innocent blue eyes and solemnly nodded his head in acquiescence. With the contemptuous stares of the store people following him the distance from the man- ager's office to the exit, my father and Donald departed. After buying Donald an ice- cream cone and a candy bar, my rather confused father turned to the little innocent: NPlease don't tell Mommy.H Alice Graifer 21

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THE BANK THIEF From the moment my father ar- rived home, I could tell it had been one of those harrowing days at the office. Nevertheless, his better-half felt it her duty as mother and wife to disclose that day's happenings. My younger brother had become a modern day Jesse James. V However to begin at the be- ginningO00lOOl0OOllGOUCIOCO Both Donald and my mother had visited the local five and ten that afternoon, Cthe scene of the crimej. After making those few important purchases that one usu- ally makes at a five and dime, that half of my family proceeded home. It was there that the theft was noticed. Among the odds and ends purchased, was a small red plastic bank which my mother distinctly remembered not having bought. Of course, Donald con- fessed readily enough that he had recently been told the story of George Washington and the Cherry Tree. With Donald full of contrition, and my mother distressed to think that our family had a nB1ack Sheep? my tired and hungry father came home to an unusally morbid household. -,Q Ay, f ,. f V4 -g- , ,x- p x X tri.. - - -', i j e tzzttb ll' X X .fn 1 gli I I V be 4 4 gm 20 . I' 'Q' ft A - drill 'f - o lpn' ' ii fi ' lm ,,i : X ihn cgi Q wg? ,JTQQEL efx- g lggjsl 7 y yr Y , 5 rg ZSNNX N kQZE+ D: i f 'M ' xii gb - It was decided that instead of ' receiving a good spanking, Cmy mother had read Dr. Spock and knew that physical brutality was harm- ful to a child's spiritb, Donald, accompanied by my father, would humbly confess his sin to the man- ager of the five and dime. Saturday dawned to find the little sinner comparatively calm and his soul-saver agitated for being deprived of his beauty rest. Certainly it was my father's place to impress upon Donald's incompre- hensive little brain that it wasn't proper to steal the brightest thing you eye, but was this the right approach? Papa's first mistake was to remove the bank from his overcoat pocket while he was standing in front of the toy bank display. One of the hawk-like saleswomen immediately pounced upon him. Soon half the store's help had gathered around the loudest attraction of the dayg my father and hawk-eye.

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DON'T COUNT YOUR CHICKENS BEFORE E THEY ARE HAT HED HGet off those eggsln shouted Mary Granger, as Cindy, a black cocker spaniel, jumped upon a box of a dozen white jumbos. UWhy must you be something that you're not?N Cindy was an average, New York dog who had one ambition in life: to become a hen. Although she looked like a dog, her idiosyncracy was to attempt to hatch anything that resembled an egg. A few months before when Cindy's mistress, Miss Granger, took her shopping, Cindy broke away from her leash and scampered to the butter and egg department. You can imag- ine Miss Granger's frantic state. All of the customers stared with amazement as Cindy politely entered and jumped on a fresh-laid case of NNew Jersey jumbo White Eggs.U By the time she found that she was not welcome there, a carton of eighty-four eggs was demolished. It took two hours to get the gooey mess out of Cindy's fur. Miss Granger knew something had to be done. but. what? ,, A A f E2 -eeh lei ' , r .fl . ' If - E 'Z' , X ,- ?? 2 'fffy' A E 1 7... .3 5 1, 3 Y ' ,,, Q f 2 EE. F? QE: f ,.,f sa- as ff: f, . 59 -qgvg Cer tZ5?ao55 '19 -fps: E211 '7 V' a gg, icy, 5, -S i, 2 '55 ,iff ,Q Q it I Q 1 1' if. ,I ff. 6 figviw I x e f I A J-- 2 Q- 111 1.-41 ,gg 2f ' Y 1' ' ' -I-1-3 - ' mu 4-,,...-sz. A 22 ' W . i -gs- fa. ,- ' O L-ff? if w' if - - . -- ezf'f T ,V Q ,,6ggff' 11 , H,1f!l111 U H HLA- 1 fl'-1 A, I Y' ' if , ' , K' - 'Z?ZZZZ621g,- -My x x ' ' 7 V11 The following evening,Miss Granger tried to get Cindy's at- tention away from eggs. She de- cided to buy Cindy bones, every kind available: H T Bonesn, NL Bonesu, nMarrow Bonesn, and nRub- ber Bonesu. This occupied Cindy for a few huurs and then she was back to her eggs. She even tried sitting on hard-boiled eggs, but try as hard as she might, it was to no avail. She just couldn't hatch those eggs. After all, did you ever see a hen hatch a hard- boiled egg? ' The next day, Miss Granger bought Cindy her favorite food, veal, and decided to make Cindy a special treat, breaded veal cut- let. Subconsciously, Miss Granger dipped the veal in egg and then into bread crumbs. Of course, when it was time for dinner, Cindy would not eat. She had no canni- balistic tendencies. In the next few days, Cindy was psychoanalyzed by a leading veterinarian who advised Miss Granger that Cindy was about to become a mother of puppies, not chicks. As soon as the blessed event occurred, she would lose all interest in being a hen. It was hurry, scurry, around the Granger apartment. Cindy was given anything she desired. With- in a short time, Cindy had her litter. They were three beautiful brown and white puppies who had no resemblance to Cindy, They all had one peculiarity, a bit of yellow fluff behind the right ear! - Neil Mendick