Walkerville Collegiate Institute - Blue and White Yearbook (Windsor, Ontario Canada)

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BLUE AND WHITE Doctor: There goes the only woman I ever loved. Nurse: Why don’t you marry her? Doctor: I can’t afford to - she’s my best patient. “Look here”, said the angry travel¬ ling man to the small-town hotel-keep¬ er, “don’t you know that roller-towels in hotels have been prohibited in this State for three years?” “Sure”, replied the hotel man, “but that there towel was put up before the law was passed.” — 10B — 10B, so I am told, is the noisiest of classes, The kids are quite bright, but as slow as molasses; When the teacher goes out we just let out a roar— So back we come trooping at five after four. Our general occupation is the chewing of gum, So that accounts for us being so dumb! Paul Luxford. 3fnrm Nine The Teachers and 9A There is a teacher named Miss Rider, Whose favourite drink is apple cider; “Bend your arms” and “Bend your knees”, Some of her slogans are such as these. When we get excused from gym each day, “Where is your note?” Miss Rider will say; And when we say “I don’t know”, Down to Mr. Ball we go. Page Sixty When the swimming pool opens we all dive in, And you cannot hear above the din. Miss Rider yells and jumps about, And one by one we get kicked out. In Science class we all are sad Because the teacher gets so mad, And if the boys shoot elastics here, They get pulled out quickly by their ear. If we do an experiment in this class, Someon succeeds in breaking some glass. Top” goes a florence flask, ‘Bing” goes a beaker, And someone’s allowance grows weaker and weaker. Another class of which I’d like to tell. Is one that the students don’t like very well; This is the French room on the first floor, Where someone is always kept in after four. Miss Evans, our teacher, comes in every day And says “Bonjour” in a very nice way; But after 9A has been in there a while, She changes her looks to a frown from a smile. Miss Auld just frets and fumes at us When we leave her room in such a muss. We use the white powder and she gets cross, And says to 9A “Just who is boss?” We run to the front to get the red powder, We hear Miss Auld’s voice getting louder and louder; She comes up behmd and makes us sit down, And everyone w ' alks to their seat with o frown. But Walkerville High is a very nice school; The teachers are swell and they don’t let you fool; You learn something there and when you get out, You’ll find work quickly without a doubt. Ann Wilson, 9A.

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BLUE AND WHITE Miss McGrath in Latin speaks; To learn this it takes many weeks. Mr. Malania, with you we’re content, To parliamentary debates you gave your consent. We have many tachers and we’re pleased with them all, Even when they report us to Mr. Ball. Miss Post (in the geography class) :— “What are the tributaries of the Nile called?” Howard Easterbrook: “Juveniles.” Old Lady—How did those rocks get there ? Guide—They were brought by the glaciers. Old Lady—Well, where are the glaci¬ ers? Guide—They have gone to fetch some more. Morrison—I hear you got thrown out of school for calling Mr. Ball a fish. Kilpatrick—I didn’t call him a fish. I just said, “That’s our dean”, real fast. When Delbert was at the theatre he became annoyed by the conversation in the row behind. “Excuse me,” he said, “but I can’t hear a word.” “Oh,” replied the talkative one, “and what business is it of your what I ' m telling my wife?” Did they take an X-ray photo of Dor¬ othy’s jaw at the hospital? They tried to. but they could only get a moving picture. Why is your neck like a typewriter? Answer—Because it’s Underwood. CLASS NEWS 10A 1. Alias. 2. Ambition. 3. Whom I admire the most. 4. Weakness. 5. Occupation. —DOROTHY WILSON: (1) Dot; (2) To play hockey; (3) Mr. Forman; (4) Arguments; (5) Getting her own way in English. —MARIE LA VIS: (1) Old maid; (2) To be a social butter¬ fly; (3) Don Kilpatrick; (4) Boys; (5) Making eyes. —DON KILPATRICK: (1) Flapears; (2) To out-talk Dorothy Wilson; (3) Gordon Shaw; (4) Girls; (5) Making puns. —EDITH METCALFE: (1) Tubby; (2) To be thin; (3) Mr. Young; (4) Talking and eating; (5) See No. 4. —ALVA (EDISON) SWANSON: (1) Nero and light-bulb; (2) To enter¬ tain Gloria Verway; (3) Gloria; (4) Gloria; (5) Gloria. —PHYLLIS MARTIN: (1) Felix; (2) Learn how to swim; (3) Gillie; (4) Quoting Gillie; (5) Laugh¬ ing. —JACK GILLILAND: (1) Gillie; (2) To get on a hockey team; (3) Ruth Gooby; (4) Rushing as the bell rings; (5) Forgetting English books. —GORDON SHAW: (1) Pshaw; (2) To be popular with the girls; (3) Jane Adams; (4) Wearing a helmet: (5) Being charming. —YVONNE WESTON: (1) Eve; (2) To be on time; (3) Yvon¬ ne Weston; (4) Big words; (5) Being late. —DELBERT TAYLOR: (1) Del; (2) To be an actor; (3) Diane; (4) Wearing R.C.A.F. badges; (5)— Whistling. —KEN SMALLWOOD: (1) Kenwood; (2) Hard to tell; (3) Lois; (4) Dropping nails in the waste basket; (5) Making inappropriate re¬ marks. Page Fifty nine

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BLUE AND WHITE KINDS OF STITCHES What kind of stitch is— Hard to live with?—Cross stitch. A part of a cough?—Hem stitch. A part of a window?—Blind stitch. Is found on a fowl?—Feather stitch. Is a fish and something everbody has? —Herring Bone stitch. Is made of many links?—Chain stitch. Is not forward?—Back stitch, is useless without a key?—Lock stitch. Repeats itself?—so and so. Ivy Core, 9B. Mr. Hartford: “Now there’s nothing in the world too difficult to overcome.” Lyle Ross: “Have you ever tried squeezing shaving cream back into the tube?” A hug is a thing of beauty entirely surrounded by a stretch of masculinity. His arms have been around more curves than a bath towel in a sorority. Men, beware! When a girl gives you too much rope, she expects to be tied up with you. She called her boy friend Pilgrim, because every time he called he made a little progress. One of our students m?t up with this on a Latin test: “Giv 1 the principal parts of any Latin verb”. The student was in no condition for the exam, but he thought and pondered, to no avail. Suddenly a thought struck him. He wrote: “Sl ' m). slippere, falli bumptus”. Put that didn’t go too well with the tea¬ cher. The returned paper had these: “Failo, failere, fluncto, suspendum.” She’s sugar and spice She’s strawberry ice; She’s moonlight and roses And loaded dice; To-day she’ll splurge And tomorrow skimp; She’s partly a cherub And mostly an imp; She’s Carrie Nation And Helen of Troy, Elaine and Scarlett And Myrna Loy. She’s real as trouble, She’s make-believe. Who? Any woman at all since Eve. Marguerite Currie, in a composition: “sympathetic ink”. Epitaph: Here lies the lawyer for the last time. Judge: Who was driving when you collided with that car? Corporation (triumphantly): None of us; w’e were all in the back seat. Many a man has made a spectacle of himself with two glasses. ODE TO 9B For I dipped into the future far as the human eye can see, Saw’ a vision of the world and all the wonders of 9B; Saw Bob Smith upon a soap-box giving us the present news, And May Gilgan in the circus in a dress of vivid hues. Saw’ Babs Field back from Mexico tell¬ ing us of w’hat to see, And Joseph Cipparone as busy as a bee, Saw’ the Armstrong sisters dancing in a sw’anky small cafe, Saw’ little Howard Waffle trying to bail out on Hudson Bay. Saw Bob Birrell selling peanuts and Wilfred selling pop, Laurie Chittim helping Albert dig up his summer crop; While our actress Norma Dobney plays on Broadway every day, Ken Bowser and Art Clarke are digging ditches for their pay Page Sixty one