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Page 93 text:
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an ,YW I, 0 x, , ,iti,f.f,,wi ,L V , psyd. V' us- asegffweffj Gus Marfin, his fa+her's oldesf and closesf friend. and sfafed briefly 'rhaf his fafher was seriously ill. He folded fhe felegram fhoughffully. sfill frying 'ro recover from his shock. Almosf subconsciously his mind fraveled back over fhe long hard monfhs of work, now behind him. He remembered wifh unpleasanf realism fhe drudgery and exhausfion, weary days followed by sleepless nighfs. He couldn'+ help fhinking of whaf if would mean fo go home now. and he wanfed wifh all his hearf fo cling +o his hold on life so re- cenfly found. A fainf resenfmenf againsf his fafher sfirred wifhin him, buf he quickly suppressed if for he realized fhaf his dufy lay in Soufh Berwick beside his fafher, and fhal regref and disappoinfmenf were fufile. Mechanically he mounfed fhe long dark sfairway and found his way 'ro his room. He packed hasfily. no+ permiffing himself 'ro fhink, afraid of his own weakness in facing fempfafions. He knew fhaf he was wishing fhaf he could wire Gus fhaf he had found if impossible fo refurn, buf Pefe had sef cerfain sfandards of righf and wrong for him- self, and his conscience fold him fhaf fhis would be an unforgivable lie. Once on his way, Pefe felf beffer inrhis mind. He was conscious of a relieved feeling of having made a decision in fhe face of difficulfies. and having decided well. He would sfay af home unfil his fafher recovered, 'rhen refurn fo New York. In fhe opfimism of his youfh, Fefe was confidenf fhaf his fafher would surely recover in a shorf fime. He felf. for some inexplicable reason. fhaf since he had done fhe righf fhing in leaving New York. fhe fide of evenfs would surely be wifh him. There was no one in fhe sfafion af Soufh Berwick to meef him. and Pefe walked fhe fhree blocks fo his home. He passed a few people on his way. who smiled af him undersfandingly fo show him fhaf fhey knew why he was back. When he came in sighf of his own house, he quickened his pace. He ran up fhe sfeps. fwo af a fime. and fhrusf open fhe unlocked door. He sfopped suddenly af fhe sighf of Gus facing him in fhe finy hallway. Perhaps if was fhe pallor in Gus' face, perhaps if was a heaviness in fhe afmos- phere. buf somehow Pefe didn'f need 'ro ask abouf his fafher, for he saw quife plainly fhaf his fafher was dead. The lafe affernoon sun sfreamed fhrough fhe doorway, slanfing over Pefe's fow- ering shoulders. He saw his shadow. huge and grofesque on 'rhe faded carpef. and his hearf felf cold and sfill wifhin him. Gus' lips moved, and fhe lines in his face seemed fo deepen as he falked. Pefe confinued fo sfand blinking in fhe liffle square of sun- lighf, and when Gus' voice reached him as from a long way off he realized fhaf fhe ofher had been falking for several minufes. Would you like fo see fhe body. Pefe?' No, said Pefe, no, l wouldn r, Gus. He sfepped quickly over fhe fhreshold, and info fhe liflle hallway. l'll iusf pul' my fhings upsfairs. he said. 89 'Nfl Wm WWW -44 :1 M .,.:M'5, .. 'Jh ,, , y Mlmlilg 'l ' if-. i F Ka W -uf .xi r 1.f.,i,v..v.
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Page 92 text:
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was-wr ffl' if W 'KWH The Train iolfed, ierking him back To realify wiTh unpleasanf suddenness. He saw ThaT They were pulling inTo a sTaTion. LighTs flashed. and voices shouTed, muffled by The din of clanging bells and puffing engines. He wondered vaguely whaT was The name of The ciTy. buT sleep suddenly overcame him, and he driffed inTo oblivion. New Yorkl PeTe felT as Though he were walking on air. Hungrily his eyes Took in The scene before him. People sfreamed by: men in rough Tweed overcoafs, sfriding affer hurrying red-caps: women in cheap fur coaTs dragging children behind Them: old women in long narrow shoes and shapeless felT haTs sfriving To keep pace wiTh The rushing crowd. Red-cap. suh? An insolenT Tan face leered up inTo his. PeTe shrank back in- volunfarily. He felT suddenly very lonely. and wished franTically ThaT he were once more aT home. BuT almosf before The wish had maferialized in his mind, his self-con- Tidence reTurned To him. No, Thanks. he said firmly and. grasping The suifcase, he sfrode quickly away. Oufside he hailed a Taxi and gave The driver The address of a boarding house which had been recommended To him by his uncle. From The firsT momenT PeTe realized ThaT his work was noT going To be easy. The hours were long and The pay small. and he was confinually impressed wiTh The Tran- sciency of his good forTune, ThaT aT any Time his place mighT be given To someone else. He was kepT busy wriTing, rewriTing, copying. The inferminable days crawled by. crowded wiTh work. Then The nighTs would follow: resfless nighTs in which PeTe was Too exhausfed To sleep. He began To undersTand more fully why his fafher had given up. and in spiTe of himself he ThoughT of iT frequenTly, buT he knew ThaT he could never face The shame of refurning home wiTh his goal yeT unaTTained. So The days driffed inTo weeks, The weeks Turned To monThs, and sfill PeTe clung doggedly To his purpose. Nafurally aloof, he made few friends, and he seldom found Time for amusemenf. Perhaps iT was This aloneness ThaT made The Time go so slowly: perhaps iT was The humdrum monofony of his life, buT PeTe was sure ThaT if was his own impaTience and The habi+ he had dropped inTo of living in The fuTure. He sTrove To curb his ambifions and To drive his idle dreams from his mind. For he persisTenTly Told himself ThaT They were idle dreams, ThaT he would be years in ThaT posiTion, years Tak- ing The same orders. years earning The same salary. BuT somehow he felT in his hearf ThaT he musT rise before ThaT, and aT The end of seven monThs his confidence was ius- Tified. One day The chief said curTly, Blaisdell, l'm gonna give you a desk of your own. You can Take The one over in The corner. PeTe was nonchalanf. Yes. sir. Thank you. sir. BuT his brain was whirling, and in ThaT second The whole world seemed To change color for him. His firsT sfep up! He felT suddenly free from The sfigma of his faTher's surrender. He was more sure of his ulTimaTe success and. giving his Thoughfs free rein, he picTured himself in The course of several years becoming an execuTive. BuT a brief Two weeks laTer PeTe's happiness came To an abrupf end. He arrived aT his lodging To find his landlady sfanding in The doorway, a brighf yellow envelope in her hand. He seized iT and ripped iT open wiTh clumsy fingers. IT was signed by 88
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Page 94 text:
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I Sli' ii ,qv wt-if , a h ,F 'li' I F l- is el ,- Q- ,,. l Lie,,,,,r,, ' .2--iff ' Up in his room, he fell suddenly panic-slricken. He fell los'r and alone, and wan+ed desperarely +o pily himself. He had worshipped his falher, and had uncon- sciously depended on his wisdom and advice. He wondered confusedly aboul' 'lhis sfrange 'lwisl' fafe had given his life, and 'rhoughf he realized 'I'he 'fufilify of all his efforls. He saw Jrhe fufure s'rre+ching ahead of him, empfy and purposeless. His li'H'le world seemed fo be rocking around him, and his dreams and ambilions were somehow fading info 'lhe pasl: He knew now +ha+ he possessed his 'Fa+her's weak characler, lhal' wifhoul' his accus+omed supporr he was nofhing, and wi+h lhis knowledge came 'rhe realizafion +ha+ as long as his 'Fa+her's characfer clung +o him, so would his fa+her's fafe. He could now never make anylhing of his life. NATHALIE SIMPKINS. 35625 I+ is colder here where 'lhe mounlains Cas? an ever-growing shadow on 'lhe snow. The sun is suddenly gone and The nigh? air lhickens. Up +o 'rheir knees lhe horses plow lheir way. Frosl 'forming on 'lheir sleaming coals. The 'rwo runners. scarcely discernable. Leave +wo small lracks in 'lhe darkness. Ghosllike fences rise and sink. Oul' on +he high road +he horses quicken pace, Trol fhrough a palch of quaking aspa quielly sighing Round 'lhe bend and over lhe bridge. The hollow sounds in lhe silence Half-scare lhe horses and rhe liHle bay snorfs. Then a friendly yellow lighl and we are home. HELEN RESOR. 90 PEFTPEB PCI
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