Valley Stream Central High School - Cadet Yearbook (Valley Stream, NY)

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THE CENTRAL FLASH relent-ing female, departed with my ancient lid, One thing more before my daughter was to see mel I proceeded to the hairdresser's and after a tremendous ordeal under the hands of one Kay Hoerschelman, surveyed my perfectly hideous wind-blown and my massacred hand for which I shall one day sue that manicuring hussy, Agnes Kiesel. But patience had its reward indeed, for I returned to find Guinevere Gwen- dolyn prospering under Dr. Lewis' excellent care. POPU-LARITY CONTEST ' M053 POPUIHI' girl ....... Rita Edwards Most POPUIHT b0Y - -- Victor N. Tompkins Prettiest girl Handsomest boy Most athletic girl .... Most athletic boy .. . Worst man-hater Worst woman-hater ......... Albert Russel Most representative ..... . . . Best prospective teacher . . . .. Most reliable Mo-st graceful Most studious Wittiest .......... . . . Best dresser fgirlj .. Best dresser Q Most fickle . . Biggest flirt . boy . . . . . Rita Edwards Leo Goldwyn . . . . . Agnes Kiesel William Buteau .. . Margaret Miller Victor N. Tompkins . Helen Dowdeswell . . . . Margaret Luca Ruth McGuigan Margaret Miller Victor N. Tompkins . Patricia Giamerese . . . . .. Fred DeBold . . . . William Buteau Ruth McGuigan Berenice Buteau Peppiest ..... Most Shy . , , ....... Helen Carey Noisiest .... . . . NOTIDHII Most blase . . . . . Margaret Luca

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TI-IE CENTRAL FLASH g children associate with such vulgar, filthy little infants as those children of Bill Duncan. The only time they can be forced to behave is when their uncle Kenneth allows them to run through his candy plant. 6 The Kenneth Sweet Plant is run on the senior basis.D Well, I must leave Sally Ann Geraldine with someone-and why not Rita Edwards Snifflestein? Her children exert such a good influence on Sally Ann. But Mrs. Snifflestein was busy entertaining the Book Club whose members were deep in the discussion of Margaret Miller's Child Psychology and Martha Karr's Life of Berenice Buteau, the Bernhardt Successor. So, I turned to my neighbor on the other side, Widow MacDoogle, whose deceased husband had left her a fortune earned in successful scavengery. HGravy Nose was growing a lit-tle deaf, but I finally persuaded her to keep Sally Ann Geraldine and make William Tervo charge my laundry bill and leave the laundry when he should arrive. Well, here I was ready to depart when I discovered that I was penniless and my hat was slightly. shabby. I smiled hopefully, however, when I greeted President Tompkins at the Central Bank. One no longer called this bald- headed gentleman of prestige Vic . His impenetrable appearance and his gigantic mustachio made one shiver and shudder. He thundered at me un- mercifully, and I finally retreated to the Sign of the Three Balls where Sammy Marks cheerfully lent me a few dollars on my watch. The years had been kind to him, and except for a single streak of gray at his left temple, he was as fascinating as ever. He was still leading a strenuous life and his name had been constantly linked with that of the modiste's, Helen Carey, daughter for the last month. I Perhaps, however, it was no more strenuous a life than that of the little dancer, Ruth McGuigan, who was enjoying her fifth honeymoon Cthis time at Nicel. She had name-d Helen Dowdeswell as correspondent 'in her last divorce case, but evidence proved that on the fatal night she had been quite alone. enjoying every move of James Nerrie who starred in The Dreamer's Arms at the Hanninen Theater. Uohanna. Matsunaga was the cashier at the box, being forced to support herself after her husband's desertionj But to continue - Oflicer Strack greeted me with his usual heartiness as I boarded the train. It was Conductor Kovacsevics instead of Leo Fink who punched my ticket. After arriving at my destined station, Porter Walter Jacobson conducted me to a taxi and the chauffeur, Red Schmidt, helped me out at the milliner's. I didn't- tip him, he didn't deserve it. Pat Giamerese and Doris Erbe had opened the most attractive milliner's shop I have ever discovered. Never shall I forget the black enameled tables, the pink draperies, and the daffodils which Edith Chvatal had so artistically arranged. I was so perfectly entranced that they black-mailed me into purchas- ing a perfectly hideous creation of orange tulle with immense vgrmillion posies SIUIHHSIY rewsins OH the brim- I C0uld have forgiven even that had I not been presented with that fabulous bill. I insisted on speaking with the manager. Dorothy Krugman, and after a prolonged discussion with that despicable, un- 20

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TI-IE CENTRAL FLASH AULHN QFUNN Dear Mr. Funn: ' ' l ' Is insanity a cause for divorce? Ethel Ochs. Dear Miss Ochs: N ' ii No. But it's a cause for marriage. i Mr. Funn. Dear Aul N. Funn: A What did Aesop say 2,600-years ago? f Sis. Dear Sis: A V ' c ' ' s i He said, He who laughs is a fool, but he who laughs last is a fool for waiting that long. ' D , g g 1 Aul N. Funn. DearAul: '- l4--- 1 me Why do they call that fellow a Knight -of the Garter?'7 I - V - J im. Dear Jim: i V i N Because he's one of the King's chief supporters. ' - b 4 - W Aul. Dear'Mr. Aul'N. Funn: i , Vat was der matter mit Henrich yet? JI see dathe is flunked already. ' ' i i 4 - A Von Gerichten. ' Dear Von: e V Q - J 1 - g Ach! Henrich vas -ben a good student but-he got Vassar on the brain. . ' ' -- V f -A - i- Q ' - -Mr. Aul N. Funn. A Dear'Aul: g' ' Viiil l. . . . . , Can you tell me one important thing we have now that we didn't'fhave three centuries ago? - it .. , N - . I Rita. Dear Rita: Me. A Aul. Dear Aul N. Funn: These rich Peflple make me sickg What's the use of having money if you don't know how to enjoy it? . Berenice. Dear Berenicez Well, Wl1at's the use of knowing how to enjoy it if you haven't got it? Aul N. Funn. ZZ