University of Missouri - Savitar Yearbook (Columbia, MO)

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(i President.— S. A. DEW. Vice-President.— J. H. IKENBERRY. Secretary.— MISS ANNA LASH. Treasurer.— MERRILL E. OTIS. Historian.— J. H. CRAIG. NCE upon an olden time, before the reign of Richard, and while Turkey Bowman was still in pin-feathers, there were born in several homes about the land, several babies, each the brightest and best looking the neighborhood had ever produced. In those days there was no Herod, and as typhoid fever had not come permanently into fashion, these several babies grew into boyhood and girlhood, each one wise beyond his years, and the most remarkable of all children even in the memory of the oldest man, but each, all this time, unconscious of the existence of the others. However strange it may seem, for history records many strange things, there came a time when all these wise ones left their several homes and met as if by instinct on a common road. They were all going to the same, then but little famed, institution of learning. They were a remarkable bunch, and they had no sooner appeared on the campus than they began to attract attention. They were not merely to be looked at, however — they saw a few things themselves, and it was but a short time until they began to make things buzz. This remarkable aggregation became known as the class of ' 06, and it was but a short time after their arrival that the fame of the University began to spread abroad over the land. Things that had never been done before began to be done, and other things that were about to be done were squelched in the first forms. When some would have presumed to promote a great Student Organization without asking the advice of the then-time Freshman class of ' 06, that class, under the leader- ship of a fiery youth, Mac Anderson by name (who was also an orator of some note, and a player of blindfold chess), arose and said, Avaunt! and behold, the movement ebbed away like Jack London did before the New York 25

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THE AUDITORIUM 24

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police. About this time it was, that a young stripling, called Easy Anderson, began to show great dexterity in juggling the sixteen-pound shot, and he developed such remarkable skill in this direction, that all other dealers in this article in all the neighboring states, went out of the business. So it came to be a fact that nothing ever came up to be done, without some member of this remarkable class was called upon to do it, and no one was ever called upon but what he did his part far better than anyone else had ever done before him. The War Department, which in those days was struggling for prestige, needed a man of beauty as well as one of brains and business for an officer in its battalion, and they came for Baby Cole. Since that time the department has been steadily growing into social prominence. It so happened, also, in those days a man there was, Kelsey by name, who held sway in the night library ; but Kelsey could not dance nor smile with a smile to beguile, and as the conditions of the times demanded in- struction in all the social accomplishments, Kelsey, like all other things, had to give way to one of the members of this aggregation of wise and accom- plished ones. Thus the once famous Flirtation Class came into existence. Again, when the Independent, a publication little known in those days but since become famous, wanted a special edition which would attract some at- tention and satisfy the advertisers, there was but one thing to do — the man- agement came to a member of the class of ' 06, Maude Williams, whom the Phi Beta Kappas has been rushing since she was a Freshman, and the edi- tion was brought out; when a second such edition was needed, namely this year, the class of ' 06 was again called upon in the person of Maud McCor- mick ; Jim Ellis found the Y. M. C. A. a highway of wooden blocks and left it paved with gold bricks ; Uriel Hughs memorized everything in the library and translated it into all the living languages for the accommodation of those who might want to know ; Artie Dew and E. B. Miller climbed on the boards and convinced the citizens that Columbia ought to have an opera house (there is some doubt yet as to when it will be built) ; Gloria Carr introduced the fudge trade in the Y. W. C. A. ; Ikenberry financed the Best College Weekly in the Middle West ; Merrill Otis challenged all comers of the heavyweights in debate, and still wears the belt; Bob Jones brought the Post- Dispatch up from obscurity; Goodson, Lhamon, Dew, Craig and Prentis, assisted by Fritz Krull and others, introduced vocal music in Kansas University ; last year, the class, with the help of Simon Frank, hegired ; this year the senior girls, with some little encouragement from other sources, finally es- tablished the Students ' Protective Association ; likewise they delved into the archives and gave the modern meaning to the St. Patrick legend ; and they discovered the underlying principle of all Easter holidays, and they are a part of the class of ' 06. 26