University of Illinois High School - U and I Yearbook (Urbana, IL)

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Page Twenty-four CLASS PROPHECY You are cordially invited to a d67720725ll'6lfli07'l of our newly perfected Time-Machine, The Chroinotron, at 7230 on the second of lane, Class Night. Professor Lainprey ancl Associates P.W.A.P., D.W.P. fPr0fess0r W'ith0iit Any Proofj lD0ct0r With Past Q R.S.V.P. Ruth Clifford, while teaching piano to Charles Wikoff, sprained seven fingers. What next? Thumbs. Sonny Busey is following in the footsteps of the great Cincinnatus, having given up the plow to lead the armies of his country. Martha Coodwine, Interior Decorator Extraordinary, has just designed the Iani- tor's Playroom for the Builtless Hotel. Nancy Carter, ancient language specialist, has been digging up clay tablets in California. Stephen Cleaver, President of the Anti-Saloon League of New York, has just refused testimonials to eighteen fcount lemj tobacco companies. Ioanne Hills, honorary member of the Bob White Clarinet Club, has succeeded Culbertson as the Buddha of Bridge. Mary Squires, who secretly bought the R. C. A. Building, has just published her new book, Do You Have the Voice of a Man or a Mouse?-How to Develop It. Bill Bullock, having spent an average of four years in each class in the University, hopes to become a senior fairly soon. His instructors advise attendance at classes. Barbara Boulware is now the NEW EMILY POST. Betty Iones, former airline hostess, is running a crocodile ranch in Florida. Forrest Wilson is chef in the Hotel Metropole in Paris. His hobby is photo- graphing his own cakes. David Vestal, poet of the Russian Revolution, is just finishing his spicy play, The Life of Pushkin. Erna Wolf, Dynamic Speaker for Democracy, receives four thousand letters a week from admirers. Wayne Bell is now living prosperously on the salary he receives for teaching Advanced Agriculture at the U. of I. Ruby fRedj McCormick, boxing instructor for the Navy, is very busy with her housework, a difhcult task on a battleship.

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Dwyer Murphy leaves his class ring to all the undergraduate girls. Floyd Parks leaves for the marines. Louise Proehl leaves her talent for writing poetry to Mr. Stortz. Mary Sanford leaves her crooning in the halls to Stella lean Lehmann. Mary Squires leaves her voice to the gravel driveway. Myron Sholem leaves his height to Roberta Roberts. Gwen Smith leaves her golden curls to Tom Lane. Gene Stern leaves fast because Evy Straub is chasing him. Lee Stevenson leaves his curlers to Gene Iacobs. Evelyn Straub leaves her convertible Bantam in the bicycle rack. David Vestal leaves his love for Russia to Mr. Kettelkamp. Forrest Wilson leaves his camera equipment to the Fifth Column. Erna Wolf leaves her German accent to Sanford Iohnston. Mary Woodworth leaves her tiny feet to Tom Daniels. LASTLY-We hereby make, constitute, and appoint the Class of '42 to be the Executor of this, our last WILL AND TESTAMENT, hereby revoking all former wills and codicils by us made. IN WITNESS WHEREOF, we have hereunto subscribed our names, the second day of Iune in the year of our Lord One Thousand Nine Hundred Forty One. Witnessed by: IANE BURKE DONALD KANE ERNA WOLF MYRON SHOLEM Page Twenly-zhree

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Warren Goodell, inventor of the U-Hold-It-EZ.-Pencil fshaped to fit the earj, has been selling peanuts at intramural track meets for four years now, with great success. Gwendolyn Smith, now known as jazzy Gwen, is saxophonist in Ioe's Hot Four. Don Kane is now President of the Here Today-Gone Tomorrow Oil Company. Buy Now and Save. F. Dwyer Murphy, golfer-lawyer, is also a popular after-dinner speaker. His stentorian voice is often heard in politics, too. Betty Anne Carter, P. E. teacher for the Y. W. C. A., has just returned from China. Mary Iohnson, notorious gun-moll, secretary of Iack Kortkamp, has just been apprehended by the long arm of the law. Billy Cagle has just salvaged his precious alligator notebook from the ruins of the fourth laboratory he has blown up this year. Mary Sanford is now vocal music editor of the Off Key Music Magazine. Floyd Parks is the test pilot used by the U. S. Marines for unusual stress under heavy loads tests. He receives a phenomenal salary. Iohn Hofmann is now first trombonist for the New York Philharmonic Orchestra. Myron Sholem, ticket agent and ring master for the Colossal Two-Ring Com- bined Flea and Dog Circus, uses Pekingese dogs exclusively. Iane Burke, eminent surrealist, has just Finished her monumental biography of Iames Stewart. Christ Katsinas, noted lawyer, has developed a habit of leading the jury in cheers during the intermission. Louise Proehl's new novel, 'lOnly a Ditch Digger's Daughter, has been cut and recut from twenty thousand pages to seven. Ruth Iacobs, well known psychologist, is in charge of the paranoiac section of the U-Ketch-Em, We-Kure-Em Asylum. Celia Christie has been judging dogs at county fairs for the highest fees yet paid. Mrs. Gene Stern, once known as Evelyn Straub, runs a zoological garden and tames her own lions with modern psychology. Her husband is teaching speech and dramatics at University High School under the recommendation of Professor Emer- itus R. C. Skinner. He has clamped down on gum chewing. David MacMillan, multi-millionaire airplane designer, drives a family of little twirlers around in his year-after-next Packard Special. Lee Stevenson, famous surgeon, is writing a series of articles for the Popular Science Monthly on How to Cut Up People and Infiuence Friends. Mary Woodxvorth is using her wily ways to influence the patients at the Last Stop Hospital. She is head nurse now. CELIA CHRISTIE LEE STEWNSON DAVID VEST.AL MARY WooDwoRTH Page Twenty-five