University of Cincinnati College of Medicine - Annual Yearbook (Cincinnati, OH)

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' hANh EVERYTHING' ' 'hA's sick pneumOnia patient was just awaking from delerium: HWhere am I? he asked fcebly, th Heaven? . . ' My goodness, n0, said Dr. Ashury, who happened to he w11h 111m, Im still with you. The Surgeon had been called for several emergency operapions Christmas night. The next morning he stopped at the bedmde of one at the cases and remarked: iiWell. how are you this morning. now that you have had your hnliday opening? up. JOHN mom PSON lth-QIVF huh. Wh ' 1'6 , Cg K hi'xxlhhiilffff r: UH P' SAD, BUT TRUE Little Willie from his mirror, Sucked the Mercury all OH, Thinking in his childish error. It would cure the whooping cough. At the funeral Willie's mother Smartly said to Mrs. Brown: hTwas a Chilly day for William When the Mercury went down. Colored Lady tow the GallerthhCan you ail tell me whar at is the eternity ward? The nurse had been trying to spray little Ethcl's throat with an atomizer and had met with considerable- opposition: I wnuldnht mind it so much, Ethel Finally confided, Hif you'd let me honk it myself. Page Two Hundred

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6 NOW 2111 of us to windows Hurk, Hoping that rhefll never :stup For anch songs we all adore Every nurse on every floor, 7 'I hen our keeper comes around. In the windows we are. found. or course she thinks we art: insane, And to Miss Logan sends our names. 8 Next day, at Miss Logank: door. Nurses stand in twos and fours. Promising her to obey. That we may in training slay. 1N Youre OPINION DOGIDWE THINK STRAIGHTEN ME OUT ? Wagner Ho Dispensary patr'e'm'J Madam, you need a little sun 3an air. Pai'ima'irBut doctor, I'm not married. Speaking QfSex Determi-nuIiuw IL was all settled by an old prnvPrl'J: Rc':ys will be boys. Page One Thmdred Ninety-n'im

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M Y MEDICAL MAN He comes, when invited, tu Rooi Garden tlanCL'H. A willing martyr, the event he enhances; In immaculate ClOLhCS, With easy grace, Charming. aimahle, fine of face. Acts never affected, nor ever tagged out. His charms ail nglitter he hith all about, He plays up to the chaptmn, his mustache so trim Adds locai color to the scene and to him. But why thus speak lightly of my medical mun? But! The morning after as he enters the wartl The smile of his lips. the light of his eyes Are hidden from me. and stoutly do 1 When with medical men he demands his case, Considering him professional, act with Liut: ttCttm'tl And preserving my dignity! all sublime ln starchy blue and white with cap in place. Lead the way through the ward both up and down. Unperturbed he asks for glnves and for thennonteter. Fer clinic paper, swabs. head mirror, sterile gown And to his list he adds a sphygmomunometer Proceeds to ask a million questions mnre nr less: Impressiotm, diagnosis and I witness the distress 0f both. He pauses Fwe minutes or more For inspiration and then makes a note. I stand mcckly by, but the cold perspiration Appears. for there come. Eve others each of his. kind. If looks CGL'IlCl wither, they do condemn For they think that I can find A similar outfit for each of them. Finished at last they next invade 3.wa N Page Two Hundred Om: