University of Vermont - Ariel Yearbook (Burlington, VT)

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prevailed upon Ufford to give up swearing and turn from his evil ways. Fin- ally it was the year in which Lapelle, for the first time, volunteered to speak without first being spoken to. Truly it was, as Dryden would have called it, an annus mirabilisf' But this year fraught with your great deeds at length departed, and you became Juniors. This year you appointed a Class Historigrapher whose duty it should be to keep account of all the bright things you said and did during the year, so to this end he purchased, at one of his opulent periods, a postage stamp, on the back of which the record Was to be kept. But alas! in an evil hour he used the stamp on a letter written home for funds, and again the record of your greatness was lost. A You became Seniorsg that is to say, a few of you did. It is at this point in your career that the loving care of the faculty for your welfare was so clearly demonstrated. They believed that many of you had become enervated by your three years application to your books, and fearing that the shock of your becoming Seniors all at once might be fatal to some, they sprung it on you gently as it were, and it was some months before you became Seniors as a class. And even yet there are still to be found among the Juniors, the names of some of the more nervous and excitable ones, and it is an open question whether they will be able this year to take up the arduous duties of Seniors. But to return to your mitey deeds. It was largely through your efforts that the military drill was re-established in the University. This honor you have to share with those underclassmen who had, or hoped to have, the white stripe on the sleeve. It was a stiring sight indeed to see those Seniors who expected no military honors of any sort, and even George Lee who has never drilled at all, go up and place their names on the petition that Bryant so assiduously carried around. And when it was known that Major Smalley had raised every member of his class to at least the rank of Second Lieutenant, we would have been callous, indeed, had we not rejoiced with you. But, While you, as a class, have been remarkable in so many Ways 5 it would be unfair to close this history without making special mention of a few of your leading lights, and so we have gone to considerable pains to work up short sketches of some of your more prominent members. We wish it distinctly understood that we do this of our own free will and that we receive nothing for it. Patrick Michael james Corry began sucking his big toe late in the seventies. In his younger years he associated with Maud Muller to a considerable extentg but a few years ago he jilted her and came to Vermont to learn to be an engineer, We cannot help thinking, however, that he has missed his calling. We think we can see in him an embryo Daniel XVebster at least, and we base our judgment on his ability to sustain an argument long after he has been beaten. Here is one of his forensics delivered last spring to his room-mate, fa O 2

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Senior Gclitorial Claes of 190 1 When we sat down to write our few remarks that were to be dedicated to the Senior Class, we felt that our task would be a comparatively easy one in as much as this class had been here longer than any of the others. It must follow, therefore, that it would have a longer history g that its existence would be marked here and there by distinctive features and characteristics which to enumerate should be our pleasure as well as duty. This we thought and began with conhdence something like this: Dear Senior Class :-The time is soon to come when you must leave us to struggle on alone. You have been much to us in times past, and we fear the result of a separation? Here we stopped, and having read what we had written, we came to the conclusion that the average reader, who knew the circumstances, would take the whole thing as a hugh joke 5 or what would be worse, think we tried to be sar- castic. It was plain, therefore, that we must try some other tack, so we began again : To the Senior Class :-We feel that the time has at length arrived when your past deeds should be extolled, and your future greatness prophesied. We will begin with your first year. In your Freshman year you-you-.Well, you can't expect too much of a Freshman, besides we were not here at that time and the accounts of what you did that year seem to have been lost. But your Sophomore year was more fruitful. As a class you fell in with Prexy's idea that scraps and cane rushes were uugentlemanly so none were indulged in. By this action, or rather lack of action, you won for yourselves the everlasting gratitude of Prexy and other good souls on the faculty. There was a report abroad at the time, that Prexy made a vow to do something for the class that stood by him so nobly in a crucial hour g but as far as we can learn you have nothing as yet, but the joy of knowing that you aided in doing away with about the last of our college customs that have come down to us from an age of loyalty and spirit. A It was this year that Grout laid his wires for Senior Class President. It was this year that McColl' first felt the yearnings to know how to dance by which means he hoped to be able to captivate a co-ed. It was this year that Carp ' 'ff Richford papers please copy. I J

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Any dumb fool ought to know this is the twentieth century, there isnlt the least doubt of it in my mind. If I had a dog that did not feel sure of it, Ild kill it to-night. Has a man got to live a year before it begins to count ? In all his arguments Pat's style is simple and forceful. He employs a great number of Saxon words and handles them with great ease and grace. His explicit reference is sometimes a trifle trite Q but never mislead- ing. Yes, we think Pat would make a good lawyerg but perhaps, after all, he shows his wisdom in sticking to the tripod, for, as an engineer he would have little to do with politics and Pat has a weakness in that direction. Carp was evolved about a score of years ago. We have tried to ascertain the name of the particular star under which he was born, but as he was a particular son himself his parents had no leisure to make an observation. Silas is quite popular with the Faculty and often gets invitations to call, much to the envy of his less fortunate brethern. The partiality of the Faculty has often been the sub- ject of remark. They don't seem to care what becomes of some ofthe students and at the same time exercise a most parental care over others. 'A Carp is one of the latter, and yet with that ingratitude which seems to us a sure sign of total depravity, he fails to see the benefit of his position. On inquiring of Carp what his politics was, he said he was a repeater. The fact that Carp is a woman hater does not prevent the fair sex from lov- ing him. There are other things, however, that do. Herman David Bone struck Burlington the fall of ,97, with his baggage done up in a handkerchief, and obtained a position among the clerks at the farm. Early in his Sopho- more year he was promoted to the office of Valet de Chambre to Nero, a prize jersey bull, which position he continues to till with great credit. He is at present engaged in writing a thesis O11 The Indehiscency of the Turnipf' Aaron Hinman Grout is the father of ex-Governor Grout. Although he was not born till 1879, he grew old very rapidly and is now well advanced in life. Aaron has pulled a goodly number of wires of various sorts and sizes since he has been among us, but with indifferent success. On occasion A. Hinman has worn a foot-ball suit, not, however, with the intention of making any team, but simply to expose his large calf to the admiring eyes of the res publica. The Governor thinks that the world owes him a living, but we are still in the dark as to how the world happened to get into his debt. A while ago he adopted a yell which he gives with great eclat. It runs something like this: Big A, little A, R-O-N! rah-rah I-rah-rah! Vermont! His latest scheme is to become president ofthe Phi Beta Kappa Society. 4-Q JJ