University of Toronto Schools - Twig Yearbook (Toronto, Ontario Canada)

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THE TWIG io 35 :- Q I - . WA- if , Q? v JN- v 7 .Zx WZ. Q61 Here goes his lcgll' Scruton fhaving milk shakel: l wish l had the neck of a giraffe. Think how long the taste would last. joy: Yes, but the milk would be sour before it got half way down. If you lisp, do not read this Solomon Socrates Scarcely Sober, Stealthily Seeking Slumber, Sheds Shoes, Seeks Staircase. Stands Staggeringly, Stumbles, Second Step Slam! Strikes Sculptured Statue Surmounting Stairpost. SUFFERING SAINTS! Shatters Statue, Smashes Skull, Sees Stars, Swears Something Scandalous. Spouse Stirs. Shrill Soprano Shriek- Socratesl Sphinxlike Silence. Second Shriek- Socrates! Socrates Still Speechless. Spouse's Sole Strikes Staircases. Socrates Scared Stiff, Seeks Salvation Somewhere. Suddenly Spots Scallywag Stealing Silver. Stop Shouts Socrates. Shanti Snarls Scallywag, Showing Shillelagh, Spouse Spies Scallywag. Screams Superhumanly, Shan't Shoot Socrates, Shoo. She Shakes Skirts, Shielding Socrates. Scallywag Scrams, Snickering Sardonically. Spouse Swoons. Socrates Soothes Spouse. She Still Says Scallywag Smashed Statue. Socrates Saved. Some Mistake My brother and l are so much alike our own mother cannot tell us apart, said Charles Kilgour. mln school my brother would throw spit- balls and the teacher would whip me. Of course he didn't know any better, but l did. One time my brother got into a fight and the judge fined me 555. Of course he didn't know any better, but l did. f 1 Q nnnnunn 5. V.,-, I-, ,aa-,-V .-, ,s ,. , . 5? ,'- s' v I' , f l'f , x. 4 1 .D - '.9'. ' v'-a' 9'a'f' ' 'rv '- '.gv215129 4 12224 H211 1 0 0 4 4 1 a 4 , , 6 - Q Q, a1sms.1v. G s . I Ax 7 c 5 ll ,. 4 fl li, j 'VL' I-luhl Look at him now, joel And to think we used t' nibble oil thc same cheese. The one who thinks these jokes are poor, would straightway change his views, Could he compare the jokes we print, with those we did not use. Reporter. 1 gil -L1 I 4 l X. ff! K X ef' . X '--' 35. . .:. . f W P . . . -. ' ' 1 ' ,f 'l ..Pf'f .A! 415 i L eif'

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THE TWIG XZ' 9 if Xl x4 a any ' W MMIII! hifi THE CADET CORPS We were more generous in our Cadet- Donations than in either of the latter. Platoon number One was under the expert eyes of that dashing man-about-town Ser- geant Rogers. While number two marched with that famed master of the bouncing-adams-apple, Sergeant Welch. Of course none of the leading abilities of the above would have been brought to pub- lic-notice, if the encouraging din of the band had been absent. Part of these joyous sounds were made possible by the combined efforts of Bob Cameron, Bill Young, and Don Clarke. Believe it or not, I am almost certain that the only factor preventing Mussolini from marching on Toronto, is his fear of catching up with the U.T.S. band. THE SCHOOL PLAY Three of our dramatic classmates are tak- ing part in the school's dramatization of lVIacbeth. They are Cameron, Duncan, and Alexander. Cameron is taking one of the major roles, as Lady Macbeth, 'Z- e,, A 5- 1' ,T I 99.1 ml ual Hal F55 f fo if I V I ...Z , it fi ax of :F FORM TIT-BITS Andrews: I wish I had a machine that would do all my school-work for me when I just press a button. Young Hugh: I-low about a machine to press the button? Gandier: I'm going to marry a pretty girl and a good cook. Strathy: Oh you can't do that. It's bigamy. MacPherson to Major Bramhttz It must be kinda difficult to eat soup with a moustache, sir? Major Bramfitt: Yes, it's quite a strain. IIIB student: But, sir, I don't think I de- serve an absolute zero. Teacher: Neither do I, but it is the lowest mark that I am allowed to give. Mr. Grainger: Do you think paper can be used effectively to keep people warm? Webb: I should say so, sir. The last report card I took home kept the family hot for a week. Mr. Grainger: How many classes of natural magnets are there? Rogers: Blondes and Brunettes. McLean: Yes, and what's more, what I do for a living takes plenty of guts. ' Nesbit: Are you a daredevil? McLean: No, I string Violins. Latest U.T.S. Tragedy A deaf and dumb lst team rugby fan hollered so loud that he sprained his wrist. Inspecting Officer: Private Shaver, what is strategy? Private: Strategy is when you don't let the enemy discover that you've finished your ammunition, but keep on firing.

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THE TIVIG WHEN YOU'RE HUNGRY BETWEEN MEALS . . . WHENEVER YOU CRAVE SOMETHING SPECIALLY GOOD . . . AND WHEN ONLY THE FINEST IN CHOCOLATE WILL SATISFY YOU TREAT YOURSELF TO- ., ff! E' 4 II I 526150115 I mr x JERSIKE It A , I 'N X? x I , IIII X I X v NUT THE BEST MILK CHOCOLATE MADE rilsnnk