University of Pennsylvania School of Veterinary Medicine - Scalpel Yearbook (Philadelphia, PA)

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A quick fiight to the north landed me in Columbia, S. C. Here Caughman's hospitable doors were flung open to me, and l was introduced to his buxom wife, who, together with the eminent Doctor, was to be congratulated upon the pos- session of nine pairs of twins. His successful eradication of the Texas fever tick had gained for him an enviable reputation and placed him beyond pecuniary consideration. The information elicited concerning Dr. Mclnnes, the light of our class, would fill volumes. Briefly, however, he had taken up the ministry as a vocation, and was doing odds and ends at veterinary science. Again taking to the ozone, a smoky spot designated the point on the map called Pittsburg. Tn need of juice for the machine and myself I alighted, filled the tanks and soon afterward stepped through a wonderfully cut glass door into a palatial creation of marble. mirrors. cut-glass and silver. Grac-efully cut in a costly beveled French mirror was the name of that brilliant exponent of The Bartenders Guidefl Butch Maurer, who out of the spirit of good fellowship ordered 'fFritz Klein, immacu- lately decked out in white apron and diamond stud, and acting as chief Knight of the Towel, to serve me with a quart bottle of Mumm's Extra Dryf' ln touching the next few points outlined on my schedule, T incidentally learned that Hileman and Pope were inspecting meat at VVilliamsburgg Stein selling patent medicine at Sharpsburg, Tremper enjoying a profitable pra-ctice at Fullerton Md., while Hopper was chief veterinarian of the same state. A quick shoot toward the Wlest landed me in Utah, where T found Irons, Wfhitehead and Crocker well established at the head of an excellent sanitary police system. Crocker showed me some authentic publications representing the work of Haubrick in exterminating sheep scab from the Southwest. Again filling my tanks, I rose to a height of twenty miles, where, being out of the general line of traffic I made a record trip to the 'fW'indy City and pro- ceeded to look up some of my old friends at the Chicago stock yards. Passing through the various departments T was overjoyed at the privilege of shaking hands with Archibald, Christensen, Cooke, Guilfoyle, Kaufman, Haigh, Hess, and Hoskins. Archibald and Christensen were conducting a first-class boarding house, where the menu read, Porterhouse steak T. T. DY Hess and Kaufman were almost inseparable, and a part of their time, aside from working hours, is spent in seeing the sights ' A pleasant scoot through the clouds landed me in Indianapolis, where Fulstow received me in the beautifully appointed parlor of his up-to-date 'infirmary for old maids' cats. Conversation developed the fact that his monetary progress had been phenomenal and his popularity unexcelled, as demonstrated by his nomination for governor on the suffragette ticket. Sailing over the fertile valleys of the Empire State, an accident caused me to descend and, alighting upon the broad lawn of Bingliamtons Insane Asylum, I was horribly shocked at seeing the emaciated, demoniacal figure of Hardenbergh galloping ferociously toward me upon an imaginary horse, waving a mythical sword and shouting, Charge upon the enemy, ,lim's duties as editor-in-chief of the 1911 Record had necessitated such a nerve-racking rumination and sifting of the manuscripts submitted by the various contributors that his mental equilibrium had become entirely shattered. Two days later I dropped into Boston, where I found that Dr. Shannon, State Commissioner of ltlealth, and his first assistant, Kane, had left for Spring Iield to attend a reception given by the Governor at the executive mansion io?

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17 v- on fp---iff aw f,v'N 14 VHS 1 ' .f gwftlif ---f g ,f X 674 my-T to me. I fully appreciate my great responsibility and the danger- S ous ground I am about to tread, for Class prophecies are danger- gpx ous propositions. In the past it has been customary for the GQLWWWD Prophet to becom-e hypnotized, by some inexplicable means mes- J 5 . .. - .. . merized, or to succumb to the effects of a highball and pass into a state of hallucination, but to do a class such as that of 1911 justice, one must have full control of those psychic forces so essential to all clairvoyants. In the spring of 1910, Moyer and I'were viewing I-Ialley's comet from the roof-garden of the Bellevue-Stratford. A sudden earthward dip of the hery orb. seen only by those on the roof that night, brought it so close to us that a quick upward reach placed its glistening tail within my grasp and I shot skyward into space at a tremendous rate of sp-eed. Time will not permit an enumeration of my ten years, aerial experiences, but suffice to say that in 1920 a Wfright air car, doing police work above New Zealand, rescued me and I was soon shaking the hand of my old classmate Charlie Ring on the 'lgarden spot of the world. He was not the Ring of old, for Dame Fortune had dealt kindly with him. His nifty little brown mustache, monocle, loud checkered suit, diamond stud, gold-headed cane and English bulldog added to his dignity and impressiveness. The aggressive spirit of Qld Penn, his political ingenuity, and personal influence with the King were cardinal factors in the establishment of a world-famous veterinary college, of which he was the auspicious dean. Through .he inHuence of Dr. Ring I was appointed sole agent for the largest instrument concern in the world, fitted out with an excellent line of samples, and, enscon-ced in the latest model air car, I left the following day for Cuba. The International Tuberculosis Congress was in session at Havana when I arrived, and I was not at all surprised to hnd that the dignihed, intellectual giant who occupied the presidents chair was none other than our old friend Sainz, who by the masterful way in which he handled the Hood of science corroborated the prediction of his classmates that he would at some time startle the world. A lm , as jgasff gb li al l 'lil C X ' i ,ll I il 'I .'ili 'Iff'7 1 'f all f lif ' ly fr , in i l 5 I 9 - W y .il I f 1 f I1 l y l ly Lll ' h f Q ,751 e I I ' n s rr: diff? --f- LECTICDN to the office of Class Prophet came as a great surprise '1 'wg 'mal F35 .,, liii I C IO2

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Making a spiral ascension with the ultimate object of a trip to Pennsylvania, I had risen only a few miles when a treacherous current of air carried me forcefully out to sea. Twenty-four hours later natur-e's elements became subservient to theforce of my propeller, and seeing a green spot beneath me I descended and found myself in County Cork, Ireland. It was gratifying indeed to learn that Collins and Kingston were serving His Majesty' by looking after the royal stable of hunters maintained in that county. Anxious to again see the hills of my na- tive State, I made a hurried canvass of probable customers and the following week started for Philadelphia. Time had wrought many changes, and when I alighted in the U. of P. Hos- pital yard, the building long since completed, with a green terrace and fountain in the court, far exceeding my fondest expectations. .The honk-honk of a horn attracted my attention, and a glance in the direction of the .-Xrch revealed Pop Stevens at the wheel of a modern auto-ambulance, returning with a case of azoturia. Stevens informed me that a specific for this had recently been dis- covered by Dr. Bredt while attending to his hne practice on South street. Further information revealed the fact that Dr. Deegan had an office in NVest Philadelphia, and had met with such success that he had purchased a beautiful home at Wfoodland and Baltimore avenues. Saxe was the proud owner of an Equine Dental Hospital on Lombard street, and Meyer Schwartz had accepted a position as City Milk Inspector. Leaving here August 17, I started in to clean up the remaining points on my schedule, At Saint Clair, Dr. Curley was found running the XVeekly Bugle, through the columns of which he had become one of the leading, politicians of his state. Wfeymart disclosed Norton and his able assistants, Fessler and Reif- snyder, conducting a campaign against contagions pleuro-pneumonia, the lirst out- break since ISQZ. I Stopping for a day at the Lancaster County Fair, I was attracted by the fine parade of premium stock, and I learned that the blue-ribbon Ayrshires and first- prize mules were the property of Deubler and Stubbs. These two men were making wonderful advancement in the improvement of live stock, and were pub- lishing a book on Breeds and Breeding. Making my way toward my machine, the shrill whistle of a peanut-wagon tickled my ear, and thinking that I would indulge, I made for the noise and looked into the hardened face of Barnes, who was standing on a soap-box and shouting, 'tItIere they are! Red hot! Five a bag. The hawk-like features of a 'ftin-horn shark running a shell game which was being liberally patronized, caught my eye, and upon closer scrutiny I was not surprised to see the old grafter Koontz relieving the unsuspecting public of its hard-earned dough, Koontz, not wishing to be thought the scapegrace of the class, asked me to take a second look at the red-nosed gentleman in the loud plaid suit who, nervously smoking a cigarette, watched the ponies flash under the wire, finishing the last race of the day and subsequently closing Royers well-made book, repre- senting winnings equivalent to the year's crops of Lancaster county. Determined to escape any further disappointments, I rushed for my machine, turned on full power and shot skywarcl for live miles. when my tank exploded. The car turned turtle, and with her nose pointed for terra nrma, descended with lightning speed, hit a soft place in the earth and did not stop until, striking the regions of eternal heatf, it penetrated the cement ceiling of Mephisto's private office and I was warmly welcomed by Moyer, who was making arrangements with the Old Boy for an Alumni llanquet in the year 2000, D. IO4 I