University of Nebraska Lincoln - Cornhusker Yearbook (Lincoln, NE)

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EBRASKA. ' N UNIVERSITY OF

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College Etiquette. -5' Freshmen military trousers may be worn through the entire year. Those of Sophomores are also often worn through. Military jackets can be worn decollete this season to dis- play a clean shirt. Waiters at the boarding clubs will appear in neglige costume for breakfast. . You may, with propriety, respond to a notice to call at the Registrar's office. It is permissible to debate with the Registrar. It is no longer held to be the best form to take ayoung lady to the theatre and occupy the Uni. box. Street cars are more recherche than cabs. It is considered proper for young men to leave the Conserva- tory when the IOIOO o'clock bell rings. If you do not receive an invitation to the girls' gymnasium exhibition, do not show any resentment, as Mr. Uhl provides seats in the windows for such as have no tickets. It is no longer proper to stick your gum under the Library tables. All wads will be checked gratis at the desk. In the spirit of true politeness, everyone will overlook any manifestation of petulance or irritation on the part of librarians, and will simply charge it to the lack of good breeding. Hats will be worn in the hand from the library to the Uni. Hall by all whose acquaintance is extensive. ii' 53' 3Ol9l16OI'l'6 lament 9' A Senior named johnson was thinking one day QVVe Wonder what made him do thatj And he said with a sigh, 'Tis grievous that I Cannot grow as I Wish, sleek and fat. So he swore, with an oath, that he fatter would grow: His board bill grew simply immense, Buthis hungry look' stayed, and he grew so dismayed, That he said, I'm in sore need of cents. X182

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Recurrence of jfacultxg 3okes. 5 During the year '99-'00 there will be twelve periodical jokes, thirty-six puns, and a varied number of gags, coming with more or less irregularity. Observations disclose that, of the above number, eight jokes and twenty-four puns come at regular peri- ods of twelve months each, while the remainder, governed by unknown laws, come and go as comets, bursting suddenly in all their brilliancy and then fading away never to appear again, or, having run their course, return, to the infinite delight of the student. The following are a few of the first magnitude, periodi- cal in their nature, and will be audible on their respective dates: The Chancellor's chapel joke, The left side of the house,', etc., will pass the meridian September 20, 1900, at 10:00 o'clock, 23 minutes, and 16 seconds. Prof. Barber's jokes--No. 1- Forte dux fel Hat in guttur, audible on November oth, at 9 o'clock, 42 minutes, and 2I sec- onds. No. 2-t'Quid rides, audible November 12th, 9 o'clock, and 22 minutes. No. 3- Pugno, pugnas, pugnatf' not audible this year, as the date of its annual appearance falls on Sunday. Prof. Taylor's jokes-No 1- Our old friend, Champaign, has a period of S7 days, IO minutes, and will appear on the fol- lowing dates: October 16th, December 12th, February 9th, and April 7th, does not occur during vacation. No. 2- Tweedle dee and tweedle dum, audible on October Ist, will appear with accelerated motion until January gd, will retrograde then till Feb- ruary 2d. No.3- Consumption in jackets, will be in conjunc- tion October 5th, November 11th, and December 15th. Jokes of the second magnitude, are less regular, but careful observations place a few on the following dates: Prof. Fling's graphic illustration of the Warrior women of the Republic, .audible April Istg Prof. Lees' witticism, Shuffle off, will occur December 14th and March 12th. A Prof. Fossler's exhortation to dull students, GMM sir' 'Zt!.fZZ.l'67', biffcf blffef Come, come, my man, time is precious! die ne:rz'e.f audible daily at Io o'clock, 20 minutes, IO o'cloclc 25 minutes, IO o'cloclc, 30 minutes. Besides the above, there are countless puns and stories sim- ilar to meteors in action, whose orbits cannot be determined, but whose appearance bears close relation to the time of issue of Ayer's Almanac. xil X