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Page 106 text:
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it ls alright. It 's that way on the Harvard list, so there can be no mistake. QBeads of sweat seen on foreheads of characters as they ponder over questionsj Prof: You 'll lind ink and a tiller on the table here. QSilence, forty secondsj Prof: I-Ias every one had their breakfast this morning? Is there any one here who has n't had his breakfast? Because if there is, I'll see what I can do. Have nit you had your breakfast,.Mr. Gibbs? VVell, I 'm sorry. I have n't had mine, either: that 's the reason I asked. Ballard: Crisesj Prof: Can't I get it for you, Mr. Ballard? Ballard: No Cexit from the roomj. Prof: Are you accustomed to go without your breakfast, Mr. Gibbs? Gibbs: Yes, sir. Mattley Craises a point and discusses it with his tutorj. Prof: Cexplains the point, that it is not necessarily involvedj. Eager: I-Iow do you expect us to answer these questions with some one talking all the time? Q Prof: Your point is well taken, Mr. Eager. CThe professor exit for more exampaper. Poithwith a tumult ensues. Loud Whispering. Continual conversation about the crayon thrown in the Special Act, supra.j Dean Qwithin. He looks through a crack and notes several for slaughterj. The professor re-enters and examination continues. Dean Qenters in proper personj : I wish the members of the third year class to come into my office immediately after this exam- ination. I Want to see you Qturns on heel and exitj. QStrict behavior throughout remainder of act.j End of Act II. lO7
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Page 105 text:
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Sprague Qmounting platform and brandishing a ball-batj : Gentlemen! I take this opportune moment of announcing that- There is no I-Iell! fcheersj. QAnd the professor live blocks awayj 2d Unknown: Qseizes a full box of crayon and sprinkles con- tents over U. 309.5 All: fPree-for-all bombardment of the stage, piano, and desk and persons crouched therebehind. Continued din, as the bits of chalk rain against walls, desk, chairs and as the chandeliers, curtain- poles, and pictures tumble down and are trampled under foot.j Act closes suddenly at 9 a.m. QBut the fiddler's yet to pay.j I Act II QScene, same. Time, IO minutes has elapsedj Prof Qpassing questionsj: Answer these twenty questions in any order you want. Now in question sixteen there is one correc- tion to be madeg in the next to the last line but one, a should be changed to Han. Did everyone get that correction? CSilence as characters begin to write.j - Prof: Of course you might have been able to see that your- selves. CSound of quills at work.j Prof: I must beg everybody's pardon for being late this morn- ing. QDitto with the quills.j Prof: Of course I do n't have anything to do this afternoon, and so, of course, you do not have to hurry at all on these questions. CRestlessness among the flunkers as they scratch their headsj Prof: Did everybody get that correction in question sixteen? Crepeatsj CExceptionally long silence of two minutesj Prof: Is any one is pen apt to run dry? Excuse me a minute. QExit LQ ' y Several: Throwing of chalk. Intercommunication between various characters as to weather outsidej Prof: Qre-enters, silence restored.j Chase: There must be a misprint in question three, professor. Prof: just wait a minute till I see. These questions were taken from the Harvard examinations. Let 's see Creadingj--No, 106
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Page 107 text:
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Act III QScene, Deanfs sanctum sanctorumj Dean is seen at desk, center of stage. Enter characters with bowed heads: they line up against the walls. Dean Cpronouncing judgmentj 1 Wfell, you have lost 309, that 's all. The Chancellor just told me you would have to go. ,HAS others enter with bated breath they cling to walls around the stageg each backs away from the volcanic wrath of the principal characteizj Dean: And I had simply nothing to say .... The only alternative now is room 305, where half of you will be compelled to stand, or afternoon classes. I tell you frankly, gentlemen, we are put back to just where we were two years ago. Gibson Qincredulouslyb : VVhat 's the matter? i Dean: Wfell, how can you ask what 's the matter. There is matter enough .... And I intend to deal summarily with the man who threw the crayon, if I can find him Out ,... Exeunt the class, dejected and mute. Sans honor, sans room, and sans good repute. End of Play. like Xs Sunny ' ffglg I I 'X 108
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