University of Missouri College of Engineering - Shamrock Yearbook (Columbia, MO)

Page 87 text:

1916 Platt discusses ages with Burger in design class and seriously contends that he is the oldest. Platt- How old are you, Burger?', Burger- Soon be 23. Platt- Shoot! I was some punkins when I was your age. PBPBPX4 Vlfeine, Qin Generation and Distribu- tionsj-i'Tague your feedt down, Strod- der. I wandt to talgk to you and I candt see youf' The only way Weine could recognize the men that were talking Generation and Distribution last semester was by looking at their feet. That was all he saw of them during class. PX4 P14 PX1 Bug- When, Gertie goes to Chicago will Wattmeter? Knutt- I don't think that he will un- less something happens to transformer looks. G , PI4 P14 PB A cute little thing was beingshown through the locomotive works. She fpointingj- What is that thing over there? Engineer-2'Oh! That is an engine boiler. She- They boil engines! Why do they boil them? i Engineer- To make the engine ten- der. 'If H P14 Why not have the Powers That Be provide Morris chairs for the engineers to recline in during morning inspection. We are sure that they would be appre- ciated. ' - P14 P14 PI' Hortense Francis Maj01', Dean of ffhe Campus buck Brush, and who during Eighty-Seven the process of some of his experimental work incidentally built the cross walk in the rear of Academic Hall, must have designed it for the boiler room of Hell, judging from the color of the concrete and the excessive width of the expan- sion joints, crossing the Walk at about every twelve feet. if P14 my Roddy- What is the significance of -43s?', , Toad- The weight of an inch cube of water one foot high. P14 P14 P14 Student to Prof- Professor, some- thing has been worrying me, I can't iig- ure it out. Prof- Well what is it? Maybe we can solve it. ' Student- Do 'they get steel wool from a hydraulic ram? Profane silence preparatory to storm, hasty exit of student. P14 P14 P14 Student Cin General Mathj- Phase is the angle passed through before time begins to count. P14 P14 PI4 Hot Wad is the best known ineffec- tive smoke consumer and preventer in the M. E. Dept. His -theories are based on the fact that a conflagration could not possibly result from smoking in an of- fice, but can readily be the direct cause, resulting from corridor smoking, be- cause it is a university ruling. Ask Boll. 'If if 1+ Hot Wad- Mr, Hubbard, what be- comes of the energy from the bacon that I ate three days ago for breakfast, if I slide this book across the table today? Hubbard- I don't knowf' . ' Hot Wad- The energy in the bacon

Page 86 text:

- - X! In an encounter with a powerful elec- tric current in the A. C. laboratory, Rob- ert Walker came out the victor. When he attempted to make a much deferred connection, the power factor was suddenly increased, the phase was split, some amperes were spilled, and the switchboard was given a black eye. Physically, Robert was uninjured, but hysterically he was upset. PFPBPX4 i The justice of the peace was just on the point of marrying a couple. Oh, before I begin, he said, I must find out your names. Marrius, said the bridegroom. Shure, said the justice of the peace, as soon as I find out your names. Marrius, said the groom. Yep, repeated the'justice, but I first must know your full name. Will U. Marrius, said the groom. No! I will be damned if I will. aaa' Hot Wad- Can't remember whether I used my Ford this morning or whether I walked all of the way to the office. X4 'If P14 Daddy Ctelling the class that they can- not multiply cows by miles and get cow- milesj- We are not nearly as hampered as we hamper ourselves by these won- derful logical processes. P14145 Hot Wad recently attended church at one of our churches on Broadway, and was seated upon a back seat between and among some gay C. C. girls. After church, he drew the usher aside and said in low tones, Say-who were those girls? I thought that they were show girls. Daddy- That scheme of education which pretends to prepare for life and eliminate drudgery is a scheme and a snare. PBPBPI4 G Lady- 'Mr. Colvin are you specializ- ing in paving? Colvin- Yes. 1 Lady- What is the chief objection to concrete pavement in this climate? Colvin- It cracks. P14 P11 PI4 - Is Charles Steinmetz guilty of Plag- iarism or is this a case of two great minds with but a single thought? Com- pare these two extracts. Extract from Steinmetz's Engineering Mathematics page 271: With the most brilliant engineering design, however, if in the numerical cal- culations of a single structural member an error is made, and its strength there- by calculated wrong, the rator of the machine flies to pieces by centrifugal forces, or the bridge collapses, and with it the reputation of the engineer. Extracts from comments made by Prof. H. Wade Hibbard on the first page of a senior electrical's blue book: Ther engineer who copies wrong or places a decimal point in the wrong place, no matter how perfect his method, is dangerous. His bridge will fall, his boiler explode, his current kill. He is useless in the profession. ' P14 PI4 PF She- Are you going to have a foot- man when you get rich? He- No. She- Why? Won't you want some- one to take you in? - T-Te- When I start home I will be all in Eighty-Six p d sa th an Io E WU ES lon ! mf js give lx l ES age, ,r ,4- gr. W 1- 4'-xv ff rj W. N N Q. ku

Page 88 text:

mfg iw 'Siigggock is turned into glycogen which is stored up in my brain and in the muscles of my arm. When I slide the book, some of the glycogen of my brain is oxidized sending a motor impulse to cause an oxidization of glycogen in my ,arm which in turn slides the book, trans- forming the energy caused by friction into heat. The heat escapes through the open window out of the room, warming up the atmosphere of Columbia, and the workmen take off their overcoatsf' Hubbard- Some bacon! ! ! if PF +14 Allgeier wanted to run his thesis on Stephen's College power plant, but A, C. thought that factor being too never constant. besides the diversity great, the load was Walker- How your girlis name is Cecil? that's a boy's name. - Cox- Well, I've been figuring on changing it. ' does it happen that -ilil A LECTURE. By H. W. Hfbbard. .i I, as a mechanical engineer, which I think I am, that is I am considered as being a successful man and a scientific engineer, don't know what I would do in such a case, that is I don't think I do. I once, while I was with the Lehigh Valley, just after my trip to Europe in 1892, being sent there by the Pennsyl- vania to study the Mannesmann process, that is, I think that I was sent there for that purpose, while 83,000,000 worth of my compound locomotives were under construction, had such a case come be- fore me. I think that after listening to Karapetoff playing on 'my piano in my private residence, I decided to do that' thing, that is I am pretty certain I did, still I am not sure, so I will look it up in Kent. Mr.--just what was I thinking about while Karapetoff was playing my piano in my private resi- dence? I know this, however, that if I did do that thing, I used chrome nickel vanadium steel, heat treated to the sor- bitic condition at about 1200 Cawnti- grade, that is, I have an idea that it was either gammar or betar iron. I very likely first studied the microscopic structure according to the Roberts Aus- ten diagram in my new Encyclopedia Brittanica, eleventh edition, page 1140, six inches from the bottom, where I have made marginal annotations accord- ing to my own practical experience. Now if you are wise men you will do the same, for I do it. This was a great aid to me while a student at Brown, for then I fought a duel with Edwin Booth the great actor-shortly after I left Brown on account of bad health caused by examinations-on the stage of the local theater, wherein I was disarmed much to my discomiiture, 'since I was a very noted fencer and could have won the duel with ease if only I had had a chrome nickel vanadium heat treated steel foil according, to the specifications of the American Society of Automobile engineers, and approved by myself. This was the cause of my putting a gear of like microscopic texture in my new ex- perimental lathe. At the next meeting, you will be prepared on Chapter 9. Are there any questions, as to the lesson to- day? I think that I have explained it very fullyf, Eighty-Eight