University of Minnesota - Gopher Yearbook (Minneapolis, MN)

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SoAlilM , ' -■ I ' fb f M .; fc %. -.fe. ' vi ' - ' i. ' ' : ' ? ., Jiusltinii HE batlle is not to the strong, nor the race to the swift. The trumpet calls, the battle is on, the race is begun. Two charming young ladies put on their white kid gloves and go to call on an- other young lady, who receives them blushingly. They converse correctly; the two white-gloved young ladies are intensely interested in the in- terests of the at-home young lady, and the at- home young lady is deprecatingly interested in the broad, intellectual interests of the white- gloved young ladies. Their mutual friends are good for all of fifteen minutes of animated con- versation. The two young ladies rise to take their leave, and one, holding the hand of her little hostess, says; Now, you will let me help you register, won ' t youP The hostess blushes again, and murmurs a shy assent. Outside the door, they of the white gloves congratulate one another. Made a hit, says one. Isn ' t she a dear? exclaims the other. IMPLICATION. Summer comes. The weather grows very warm. They of the white gloves are very busy. They spend their mornings sitting at the telephone, most unconventionally attired, talking — yes even to the point of hoarseness — to the butcher, the baker, the candle-stick maker — and the alumnae. They spend the afternoon in a hot, steaming kitchen spreading sandwiches; between remarks as to the quality of the butter ihcy exchange excited comments on the characters, personalities, histories. and prospects of their last evening ' s guests. They spend their evenings entertaining. They pass around sandwiches and coffee and ice cream and salad, though their souls sicken, and their hearts grow faint within them. They sing, though their throats be dry. and their tongues cleave to the roof of their mouths. They converse, though their intellects dry unto dust and the founts of their wisdom trickle away. And they perform — oh yes, they perform though their col- lars do melt, and their laugh- ter is hollow. And the en- tertained sit by and eat and eat, and smile, and say th;y had a lovely time, and go home, and change their dress- es and go out and are enter- tained further. And this, some one has called by the name of Rushing. But it is. in truth. ABOMINATION. The weather is no longer warm. It is hot. September has come; matriculation week commences. Many, many young ladies stand in line, and lie in wait. Twos and threes put their heads together and ■■ ' =• ' ' - --

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iT buzz and buzz and buzz. I he victims — erslwhile entertained, now hustle from the Registrar ' s window to Enrollment Committee, from weary waiting line to weary waitmg Ime. bewildered, uncomprehending, un- happy — the victims glance helplessly at one another and watch, palely, while with businesslike zeal their conductors jot down dates in expens- ive little books. And as the hot, jostling, noisy, confused day draws to a close, they are led off one by one. and the hearts of all are wildly beating. This is called: DIS- CRIMINATION. ' Me.nntime, their brothers are not idle. Many young gentlemen stand in line also, and automobiles wait outside the door. Two young men hover about a group of other young , T men, and at Ust one says: How v ' K.-. - do, Jones? I ' d like to meet your friend. And with a furtive, tri- umphant grin the other replies: Ah yes, Jackson: all right Bill, want you to meet Mr. Jackson — Bill Hobbcs, one of our fellows from I ' ale. A MISCALCULATION. Another young man is a center of interest. He is entertained by inter- ested friends at luncheon, with an- other circle of same he walks the , grounds of the scat of learning, dur- ' mg the afternoon, and in the evening he goes to dinner with the third group. He does not get home till morning. This is EDUCATION. But when the sun rises on the new day — ah! then comes REVELATION ! For the battle is not to the strong, nor the race to the swift. ,„- i i;. 5i ' v- A Miscalculation '