University of Miami - Ibis Yearbook (Coral Gables, FL)

Page 7 text:

 I IIIIIIE, THE mis . . . first saw tin light of day on a small spot of dry land in the Kvergladcs . . . confesses lii- childhood ambition was to fly the mail . . . came to the University at the instigation of Dr. Miller, on a zoological scholarship . . . dotes on tall, swanlike women . . . has been mistaken for any number of things: a witch on a broomstick, a stork, and a duck during hunting season . . . can't account for his aflinitv for 1927 birdseed . . . still chuckles over the time he perched above Scotty Mason's doorway one 4 a.111.. croaking “nevermore . . . boasts that his best feature is his nose . . . “so aristocratic. . . . modeled once for the American eagle on a poster, hut had trouble camouflaging his more extenuated extremities . . . sniffs pleasantly at his favorite flower, the 'ihiscus . . . did snap rolls, loops, ehaudelles, and immelmans at the Texas Tech game out of sheer joy . . . holds intercollegiate high jump record . . . tried to join the Air Corps, hut was rejected because of a bad neck condition . . . gets a nasty pleasure out of pulling the old gag that the courses he like.- best in college arc Slop Shop 101 and Patio 200 . . . admits his worst habit is eavesdropping . . . loves to perch on transoms and listen . . . but maintains that this makes him the perfect candidate for your guide to the University yearbook, and as such, we introduce him. Ladies and gentlemen, we give you the bird—your official guide for the Ibis of 1942.