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took of delicious refreshments, and then adjourned to still another party at a place which shall remain name- less to protect the innocent. People were surprised to find that I had a more serious side and could show a little talent. Proof of the pudding was in the tasting of two presentations, ' Ama- teur Antics ' and the ' Freshmen Money-Maker ' . Being versatile I helped to sweep the floor of the U.S.O. Canteen, which was featured in the first event, and took the part of a wrestler in the second, which was a take-off on various television productions. Although the class of 1953 took honors at Amateur Antics, I came into my own in the Money Maker when I stood on the stage of the assembly hall, dressed in my leopard trunks, and, looking for all the world like a second Gorgeous George, subdued my wily opponent. Incidentally, Dagmar, Jerry Lester, Dick Contino, Laurie Anders, and several other celebrities also appeared. A goodly sum was collected on the sale of refreshments, and a few of the people who bought them stayed to see the show. And then, all too soon, it was Class Day. I took part in all the games that afternoon; but didn ' t win, sorry to say. I explained to everyone ' s satisfaction, how- ever; after all, I ' d just returned from the hospital, where I recovered from a nervous breakdown which resulted from an overdose of final exams. That night my lungs almost burst, as our class sang of our undying affection for our class advisor. Several other tuneful renditions were presented by the group, but once again another class took the honors ; the out-going Seniors. The wound was salved by President O ' Leary ' s compliment on the tremendous volume of the Freshman efforts. After a restful summer of dodging the draft from state to state, I returned eagerly to the ivy-covered college, only to find the female students en masse, in a severe state of doldrums. After conscientious investiga- tion, I took a peak in the biology lab, and found it strangely vacant. The professor who had been the girls ' idol was missing! ... A few impromptu parties and a course in psychology soon cured them of their loneliness. The latter can only be referred to as ' Very good, very good ' ; and was awarded five gold stars by the student government. Being more mature, our class decided on an histori- cal setting for its second social function at the school, and the ' Colonial Cotillion ' was a huge success ... I ' d spent my summer earnings wisely having invested in a plaid tuxedo, so when the annual school formal arrived, I was there with bells and a bop tie on. I tiptoed through the tulips with several enchanting young ladies, who, upon closer scrutinization, turned out to be my classmates, with make-up on at ' Tulip Time ' . Con- trary to reports, I did not get my nose caught in the revolving windmill which served as a centerpiece in the hall. 11
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