University of Maine at Portland - Reflection / Umpire Yearbook (Portland, ME)

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PUVIAN 1925 23- 03111: leamlty 15:23. Earle Entry Ginnnfngham XVhen George Washington was born unto men. America was fortunate. 1When Lincoln was born. again man was the better off. XVhen our President, Dean Earle Henry Cunningham was horn, there came into existence with him a great desire to tlo something worth while and Maine is the henehciary. Maine in the year 1921, through the untiring eEorts of this great educator, was blessed with the birth of its Fifth college, Portland University. In this institution is invested the life of our President. in it is invested the great and burninginterests of many students. We all see the great possibilities awaiting us and this is all priesihle through the super human ambition and everlasting cmtrage of our dearest friend in the time of trouble, President Earle H. Cunningham. Brnfessnr i. militant: Stuart HA friend in need is a friend indeed? Thus we count in the head of the Busiw ness Atln'linistration Department. One Senior made the remark to me, llProEessor Stuart is the best hearted man on earth. and aeicle from the other members of the faculty whom he equals, but cannot heat, we are inelined to agree with our fellow student. If you once make the friendship of this man you want to 1mlue it highly for it isnlt very often that we find a FRIEND iii the time 01' need. Iimfessm' malph E. CEmmirrgltuut 51-9 and Hfmfm's pure gold? NO, more tlzan that. Professor Ralph Cunningham is what we term 1009979 pure radium. Rae clium is the most valuable metal in the world. Professor Curlingham is the most valuable nProf in the world and then some. Prof. Ralph is also the most sen- sible man in the world. for he is the orig- inal booster of Henry Ford. Eminent Erma! at. $61 Hels a good scout? You often hear this expression in any college, but the reason you hear it so much at P. U. is be- cause that title just fits our Professor of Economics. Professor Hall has been unanimously elected the coach of the varsity debating teams next season. Prof. Hall has an A. 13. Degree from Bowdoin. Ernfeaaut 329:: 053mm: Saheaung mSolid logic, another college term. Professor Shesoug is what we term a man made out of nsolid logic, mixed with common sense. good humor, and an understanding of human nature, what more could you ask for. Professor She- song is the head of the law department, and what he doeenlt know about the law wouldn't do anyone much gtmd. Profes- sor Fhesong is a graduate of Colby Col- lege, aucl was very instrumental in plac- ing the truth before mlr Legislature this year, and we may feel safe to risk our troubles with him any day. Brahman: manrite A. $nrist We all appreciate the Fine work done by Professor Morin during his stay here and are all very sorry to know that he will not he with us another year. Professor Morin is a graduate of Bowrloin and had cotii- plete charge of the Prize Speaking Contest. tContinued 011 page 26'J

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22 PORTLAND UNIVERSITY get a pair of horses to pull my car out of the ditch. You seeey I doxft sec nothhf, the man broke in, they ailft no hosses here and whats more yotftl better make yerself purty scarce. too. Dick was puzzled by this invitation to go. and asked the man if he lived in that house. HYes. I live in this house.' was the re- ply. Hen' I wmft tell yer to git out of here again. As the man appeared to he desperate, Dick decided it would be best to go, but his curiosity was aroused. He wanted to know who or what was so carefully guarded in that house. He walked back to the road and turned around in time to see the man open the door and slip quick- ly into the house. Dick thought he saw another figure inside, hut was not sure. The door then closed and left the house in darkness again. save for the faint beam of light at one side. He waited for a few moments. and as no one appeared. he cautiously crept around to the side of the house. where he saw the gleam of light. Finding that the light came from heheath a window shade, he lifted himseTf up to the window and peeped inside. What he saw made him Start: in amazement. He quietly slipped away and quickly returned to Bill. who was still waking patiently. He now told Bin of his atl- venture and concluded by saying: mud now what ought we to do ahottt it? Pm going to take your advice this time. Let's go hack to the town where we got the gas. and get the sheriff, excitedly suggested Bill. 'tGood idea, agreed Dick. and so say- ing. they started hack to the town on foot Twenty minutes of a walk brought the boys to their destination, where they n found the sheriFf. Dick told him of what he had seen and how the 1mm hatl nc- costed him. The sheriff immediately got his ear and took the boys with him to the house Where Dick had gone to get the horses. The three quickly jumped out of the car. hurst open the door. and caught three greatly astonished men Wm'king a still. After the sheriFf had taken the men to jail, he returned with a pair of horses and pulled Dickie ear out of the mud. He took their names and addresses and bade them a'hearty itgood night, boys? A few days afterward. Dick received a note from the sheriff, saying that the tall man who had accosted him was wanted by the police. A reward was Offered for him. . Soon afterward, Dick received the re- ward which he Shared equally with Bill. saying.- Wlhafs once the car paid us by skidding. What do you say about that, old top ? HAZEL WELCH. THE BARCAROLLE Out of the night phantomlike. disturbv ing dreams. and playing havoc with sleep. came the consciousness that all was not at rest The sensation was mysterious enough in itself. Some inner sense was keen enough to detect an ethereal wave. though it Could not diagnose it. TLC darkness hung like deep folds of crepe that smothered. The day had been warm. very warm indeed, hut the night was op- pregsiveiy hot. To tempt sleep after its desertion was useless. In iesTgnation. I arose, and without more than the custom- :.ry resistan-Ce from furniture. made my way in the dark to a window. Leaning on a sill, 1 gazed about. Not even :1 iCantinued on page 23h

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14. - PORTLAND UNIVERSITY Enhatm: Qllam gmaintt JOKES HEARD IN A SCHOOLROOM Teacher: How many seasons in the year? They: Two, the busy season and the dull season. Am NEEDED EDUCATING A Kentucky mountaineer led his over- grown son into the schoolhouse and asked the schoolnmstei' what studies he taught. XYell. themes arithmetic, geography. trigonmiietrye t'Thatiil do. that'il do. Mister? inter- rupted the father. hImml him up with triggemmetry. llc's the only pom shut in the family. IJum: til heard that an inmate at the insane asylum killed himself. Hummer: XVhat was his reason? Dum: He thought he was a sentinel on duty. and shot himself when he forgot the password. SHIPMENTS WERE MIXED Miss Curleycue, said the office man- aggir apologetieally to his stenographer one morning. I would prefer that you do not write lettevs to your young man friend during ofiice hours. Smith and joules report that we have sent them a shipment of love and kisses instead of the tar and axle grease they ordered. A HARSH CURE A husinese man had the hahit of leav- ing his umbrella at the otiice. One morn- ing on a street car he ahsent-mimlcdly picked up the umbrella of a ymmg lady who sat in the same seat. h'I beg your pardon, but this is mine, said she. He was much embarrassed. and that night gathered up all his umbrellas to take home. in order to forestall any-fur! that experience of that sort. When he get 011 the car there sat the same young lady. Leaning over, she said in a low tone: 1 see you tlitl very well today, after all.u A salesman traveling in the Southern States ftmmi his heavy underwear un- comfcn'tahlc and sent this telegram hack to his wife: :4. U. S. U. V. D. 13.1.3.9. t'I-Iow dare you? If 1 were a man I would punish you for that kiss. uFem- nnt, clear one. If you were :1 man you would have no occasion to pun- ish me. Little daughter tat a showy uW'hen are all the Indians coming on? Mother: Hush, there are 110 Indiana? Little daughter: dWho scalped all the men in the front row? NOT WORRYINJ Old-fashiohed mother tto daughter who is putting some money in the top of her stockingii My dean how do you get your mone-xr out when men are around ?u Daughter: Oh. I don't have to get my money out when men are around.