University High School - Flickertail Yearbook (Grand Forks, ND)

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WANT ADS FOR SALE For Sale Cheap-A few frayed remmants of Seniors, pretty badly tattered and torn after four years of hard usage-Mr. Kazda. Evening dresses half off-Gar- rison. Gallagher's Ice Cream, say with a brick. See our line of boys' suits, fifteen to eighteen years old. If you wish a good terrier dog, see me at once.-Ryan. For Sale-Coffee and a roll downstirs-10c. For Sale-Choice bits of gossip and scandal. Prompt delivery guaranteed-Garrison and Redick. For Sale-My position on the Midget Staff-Milton Schroeder. FOR RENT For Rent-Modern house by man with unfurnished attic. For Rent-Four room apart- ment with large airy bathroom, street car stops at door. LOST Lost-Picture of Rudolph Valen- tino. Gertrude Lundy. Lost-Tiny speck of my bash- fulness. Return to Sam Arnold. Lost-Somewhere between His- tory room and Girl's rest room, a half credit in English History. No reward is offered as it is gone forever--Leeson, Fuller, Vallely. Lost-My hair breath while bluffing in English class-Konrad Keck. FOUND Found-Some trouble between here and the office. Owner can have same by calling for and pay- ing for this ad. Found-A bunch of failures -Faculty. Found-Much diiiiculty in get- ting Flickertail material handed in on time. Editor-Greenberg. WANT ADS. Situations wanted--Job as a rich man's stenographer.-Leone Langness. Several fistic champions to train. I have recommendations from several noted maulers.-Victor Bonlie. Wanted-A short easy method of obtaining grades. Something ro- mantic preferred-Dorothy Mac- Millan. Wanted-Some more raw mat- erial to make seniors-Faculty. Wanted-Something to make me grow up, I feel so tiny.-Bet- tina Bush. Wanted-A recitation from An- dos--Miss Laycock. Wanted-A platform or a soap- box. I want to make a speech.- Roy Greenberg. Wanted-A way to get good marks without studying-all of us. Wanted-Young woman for hanging up, shaking out and fold- ing.-Apply Model Steam Laundry. MISCELLANEOUS Others have cheated you, give us a chance. See 1848 Rogers Brothers at our store Saturday.

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DOMESTIC SCIENCE Miss Halgrim-What was that awful noise I heard? Allie Olafson-I dropped the biscuit I just baked. TUT! TUT! One thing that has not been found in King Tut's tomb is the remains of a freshman. PROOF Hazel Jack-Miss Laycock would make a very good Geometry teacher. Greenberg-Why? Hazel J ack-She is so very particular about her proofs. Sophie Garrison-What's wrong with the car? It squeaks dreadfully. Lyle Sandlie-Can't be helpedg there's pig iron in the axles. FLASHES I'm a world beater remarked the comet as he passed the earth. It's bad enough when it is raining pitchforks, but when it comes to hailing streetcars it's pretty rough weather . I never feel free in this place said the convict as the warden turned the key on him. My efforts are not altogether fruitless, said the bum actor as some- one in the gallery crowned him with a lemon. That settles me said the dust, as the cloud burst. A cook's life is certainly full of interest. Everyday she has stirring times. What a splendid fit said the tailor as they carried the epileptic out of the shop. They shall not pass said the teacher as she tore up the examination paper. What the French want, evidently, is coal by Ruhral Free Delivery. Henry Ford and Jackie Coogan make a nickel while you read this line. The world owes you a living but you must show it what for. You don't have to be bald to be coming out on top. A girl can be pretty smart, but seldom both smart and pretty. Guess I'll drop in on the boys, said the miner as he fell down the shaft. I'll take a day off said Walter, as he tore a leaf of the calendar. There goes the man I'm laying for, said the hen as she watched the farmer cross the yard. I'll take time out said the pickpocket as he lifted his victim's watch.

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STYLE Dame Fashion sent forth a decree, That skirts rather longer should be. The flappers objected. And long they reflected, But, they wear 'emg its the style now you see. EVOLUTION Freshman-Please mother, may I go out to-night, if I'll be home early? Sophomore-Let me go out, I'l1 be home by eleven. J unior-I'm going. Senior-Good-night. Leave the door unlocked. Ray can walk two blocks in five minutes. Dorothy can walk it in ten minutes 3 how long will it take them if they walk together? Answer: Two hours. .il Miss Stenmo Csobbingj-I just made some cookies and my doggie came and ate them all up. Dybvick--Aw, cheer up I'll get you a new dog. Miss Laycock-Diagram the sentence-An idle mind is the devil's workshop. Mr. Schroeder-Where shall I put the devil's workshop? . TO THE GIRLS Here's to the girls we all love well, What great old stories they can tell, Here's to their smiles and delight That's made men work and others fight. Here's to the girls so happy and gay, The piper plays but the men shall pay. Here's to yours and mine and all, Here's to those for whom we fell. JOKE EDITORS' LAST WORD We've said our last say, We've brayed our last bray. We hope you'll consider us Well worth our hay. BACKWARD We hereby proclaim that we have never been so gloomy as when writ- ing this humor section. We pray for the time when we shall have the courage to read what we have written. Furthermore we highly resolve that when this Flickertail is issued we shall be well versed in the art of boxing, rough and tumble fighting and other means of self-defense.