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I see Ira Jeffery, that fighting, chess-playing, cigar-smoking senator from the northern plains pops into power sending the United States into a turmoil. Neil Rankinc out-shouts Francis Healy in the House of Representatives while Boh l ercn, Palmer’s official yes-man, becomes vice president, Betty Ritchie crashes into Fruen’s holies dc Parce in the role of bubble-dancer, while John Liggett and Chuck Levinson wait at the stage door. Betty Kuchn stars in the Gold Diggers of 1949 with a supporting cast of a bevy of beautiful girls, including Marjorie Cummins, Ruth Ellison, Roxanna Klein and Margaret Macoubrey. Countesses Blank and Blankety-Blank, nee June Little and Helen I-athrop respectively, arc spending the winter in Florida with their very private secretaries. McGee and Moorhousc. Bill Ovroni is teaching the South Sea Island maidens how to swim, while schoolteacher Penfield looks on with an austere eye. Hank: We’ll bust in on the Yogi’s trance just long enough to hear Warren York, our mammy-singer, sing St. Vitus Blues. (He sings.) Lampland: Well, Yogi, let’s see what more the future has in store for us. It looks as though Artists Snyder and Salisbury arc in France teaching the Europeans how to paint. Gordy Sinclair and Sam Williams win the Nobel Prize for literature through their epoch-making book, “Lives of Great Men. (They just interviewed the members of their class.) Nancy Jane Babcock. Jean Beddal, and Betty Bell, co-editors of a women’s weekly gossip magazine, arc publishing a series of stories by the world famous author, Kay Heaton. The Three G Chords,’’ the rhythm team of Margaret Glocklcr, Alice Gortner, anti Helen Gould arc sweeping the country by storm, while Town Crier Buzzed, the literary dictator, dishes out his dirt each Sunday night. Hank: Well done. Yogi. Now that you have cleared up the futures of many of our already famous citizens we arc going to let you listeners hear some promising artists who have not as yet made a name for themselves. The rest of the program will be taken up by an amateur performance. The first number will be played by the Scotch Highland Brigade. The Brigade is made up of Bagpipers John McCarthy, Elaine Fraser, Mary Jane Hazen, Ruth Herrmeycr, Tom Garrett, Bill Rhodes, and Dean Arny. All right, start wheezing, laddies and lassies. (They Wheeze.) Hank: That was fine. The next thing on the program is another conglomeration. It is called The Swiss Bell and Bottle Tinklers. The members arc Kenny Peisch, Ed Seder, Ruth Shellman, Betty Mack, Dmisc I.ightncr and Neil Sherwood. Okay tinklers, tinkle. (They tinkle.) Hank: That was elegant. The next person who will entertain you is Cowlx y Earl Hanson. What arc you going to do, Mr. Hanson? Earl: With my teeth I am going to imitate a horse galloping. (His teeth gallop.) Hank: Here come seven tap-dancers. They arc Isabel Hazeltinc, Virginia Keithly, Virginia Mickcl, Jean Mowery, Jeanne Oistad, Ruth Kittleson. and Lois Peterson. What arc you going to do, girls? Lois: We are going to play Chop-sticks on seven pianos with our toes. (They tap Chopsticks. ) Hank: The next number will be played by the Women’s Amateur Philharmonic Orchestra. They seem to play rather peculiar instruments. Ada Ril'kin plays a comb, Patricia Sol-haug plays a sweet potato, Phyllis Wesley plays a cigar-box guitar, Virginia Poucher plays an auto horn and Harriet Palin rattles the spoons. (They play.) Hank: The last number on the program will be sung by the Koco-Krax Quartet, Jack Andrews, Harold Ferrin, Bill Fournic and Louie Quast. (They sing, and the listeners whose radios are still on, turn them off.) I L A Nineteen HE NINETEEN THIRTY-FIVE BISB
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