University High School - Bisbila Yearbook (Minneapolis, MN)

Page 29 text:

K3I w vidual China drinking cups for cows; Emmet Field, straw-chewing farmer; Donna Kurtz, chief soloist for the Deaf and Dumb Asylum; Russ Jurgenson, world-famous futuristic artist. The next one Alice was slightly puzzled over; finally she recognized Don Burch, dog catcher of London; the next. 1 loppy Canfield herself, ardent missionary in the deep wilds of Africa; Ellen Oren, America’s most gracious telephone operator; Henry Clark, husky All-American Fullback; Helen Wold, flipper of flap-jacks at Child's restaurant. But this time Alice was a very, very bewildered little girl. What could it all be about??? The White Rabbit then called fourth the defendant whom Alice recognized as her namesake, Alice Riley. “What has SHE done?” whispered Alice to the White Rabbit. The White Rabbit explained that Miss Riley, an energetic worker for the Protection of Blind Mice, had broken into the National Legislature and created a great disturbance in demanding the right to talk, causing her immediate arrest. “Call the first witness!” bellowed the King. The first witness, trembling with fear, turned out to be Rhoda Fierce, the Dean of the Latin Department at Columbia. Much frightened, she could only mumble, and was hurried off without delay. The next two main witnesses proved to be Winifred Washburn and Adolf Olson, successors to Vilma Banky and Rudolph Valentino, respectively, on the silver screen. The witnesses followed in quick succession: first. Theodora Sutton, famous tight-rope walker of Broadway; Nance Staples, business manager and athletic instructor of the Society for Brokendown Debutantes; Ruth Thorshov, author of the thrilling novel and best-seller of the day, “Only A Dried Rose;” Lyman Swendson, valet to the Russian Ambassador to Sweden; Mary Wildes, Leader of the 100 in New York; Theodore Rasmussen. Judge in the Divorce Court in Rome. By the time their testimony had been completed, Alice's rapt gaze was employed in staring at the audience, most of whom she recognized as those terrible Seniors.” Seated among them, she saw Madge Stricklcr, the quiet and efficient wife of a poor minister; John Shuman, the Burning Poet of the Age; Ruth Schultz, first women Governor of the Philippines; MacGregor Beadie, the instructor in the Boys’ Gym at U. High; Helen Wildes, a patient, plodding seamstress; Caroline Van Koughnet, a stern, unrelenting champion of the rights of the Guinea Hen; Har Gieseke, vermin exterminator; Marjorie Page, head waitress in the Greasy Spoon Restaurant; Roger Haynes, alternately White Wing and fencing master of Pctrograd. Next Alice’s regard drifted over to the Queen's party where, again she saw her old friends: Robert Dc Vinny, the genial Lloyd Hamilton of the Stock Exchange; Luree Chcyncy, America's greatest actress; Margaret Mull, wild-west cow girl in a traveling circus; Arthur Lampland. Professor of Anthropological Paleontology; Florence Lamberton. the premiere danseuse in Hapsburg; Bud Miller, editor of the American Girl; Wendell Johnson, manager of the Canary Islands; Tirrntij-Thrrt'

Page 28 text:

i « imm Roll with a B average or above for the entire year. Acme, a girls’ honorary organization, claimed two from the class.” The lawyer stopped him with, “That will he all,” and the third witness was called to the stand. The jurymen looked at one another. Surely, during its first two years the class had been guilty of the accusation. 1926, a dapper youth with a collegiate air. began, “What a fine bunch of Juniors this class made! Not a better group of officers could be found. They were: President, A1 Tucker; Vice President, Everett Drake; Secretary, Ted Ras- mussen; Treasurer, Mar Giesekc. The class originated tin- Junior News a tier and edited it very successfully. At the beginning of the year they had very little money, but at the end there was enough to give a .1. S. that was the real thing! Almost everyone said that the poster decorations were the most unique that had ever been used at a dance of that sort. “Did they do anything in dramatics? asked the lawyer. 1926 beamed. “Yes, several members of the class produced and took part in an amateur movie performance. In assembly they put on an amusing skit to advertise the Senior Vaudeville, and several one-act comedies.” “That will do. The jurymen exchanged wise looks and nods. Rut still there was a chance that during their Senior year this class might have spoiled their record.' 1927, a jolly little boy with freckles and a pug nose, came to the stand. “Gee! he burst out, “This class is keen! They’re winners in athletics. You ought to see'em grab a ball and pile up scores. That feller, Al, was a swell football cap- tain and Ev Drake could sure shoot baskets. And the girls too! I always thought girls athletics would be dumb till 1 seen them Seniors win the Championship at the Gym Exhibit. You’ll have to hand it to the Seniors in them things they called 'Footlight Fancies.’ 1 pretty near bust laughin’ at Bob De Vinnv and liar Giesekc and them Chinamen in the last act. And say, they can dance, too! Oh, hoy! That Mardi Gras was a funny party—all in such queer rigs you couldn’t tell’em apart; and at the J. S., they sure did—” but the lawyer interrupted this eulogy, for the jury had heard all they needed. “Gentlemen of the jury, he began, but before he could proceed they all arose and with one accord shouted “GUILTY! FUTURE As Alice sat in the court room, she gazed so steadily at the King of Hearts that she finally fell into a doze and dreamed that she was hack in old U. High. A smile played over her face as she thought of the good old days and especially of the Senior Class of 1927. “Wake up! said the Gryphon. “They’re going to start. Alice looked again at the jury box where the Dormouse, Bill the Lizard, and all the rest had been, but to her surprise the present occupants of the box were none other than mortals whom she recognized as Seniors she had known at U. High. How greatly changed they were! Behold Alva Swain, now the kitchen or errand boy in the best Hotel in Belgrade; Doris Rockwell. 1917’s own Dorothy Dix; Margaret Payne, hair dresser in “gav Parce; Jack Barwise, salesman for indi- Ticnihj-Ttro

Page 30 text:

Marjorie Jewell, who lias finally succeeded in vamping the Prince of Wales; Virginia Fehr, a famous, and much-sought-after medium of the Spiritual World; Everett Drake, Sultan of Timhuetoo; Margaret Hallstrom, great New York lawyer; Alice Kelm, an evangelist of nation-wide repute; Katherine Preston, a modern Queen of Sheba; Jo Ulrich, a second Wodehouse; A1 Tucker, an incomparable French barber; Hob Gould, bootblack in the Brazilian Jungle. Alice found herself yawning quite suddenly, and awoke to the realization that the trial was ended and the defendant acquitted. All were gone, and Alice was quite alone, so she rose reluctantly and sauntered out of the door after her friends. LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT When Alice finally awoke after her visit to Scniorland and found herself back in her little Garden with its China-plate walks and its pretty yellow and pink daisy beds, much to her surprise, she found a parehment document in her hand with a big, red, wax seal upon it. On opening it, she read wonderinglv that the scroll was a kind of will which the Seniors in Wonderland had bequeathed to Alice's friends back home. It read as follows: Marjorie Page finally decides to give up her | ersun.sivc eyes to Naomi Fredrickson. Donald Hiireli with reluctance bequeaths his tcrpsichorean art to Seward Spencer. Ellen Oren leaves her finest switch with much love to Hetty Gove. Margaret Payne, with soils racking her frame, tenderly gives her auburn hair to I.orna Larson. A1 Tucker, choking hack ignoble tears, entrusts the entire cares of the school to his beloved brother, Robert. Madge, with a dramatic gesture, wills her deep emotions to Andrea Kiefer. Kmmet Field hands over his shnpely avoirdupois to Dan Carroll. Ev Drake bequeaths his snappy tram playing to Lloyd Kempe. Jo Ulrick with much gastly gargling, dishes over her dogmatic coat to Mary Lou Wold. John Shuman, swallowing a cough drop with great dignity, decides to entrust Croft Gear with his mirthless humor. Mary Wildes helps all athletic girls to success hv leaving her hop, skip, and jump medal to anyone who can earn it. Helen Wold leaves her moral stability to Uoinola Griswold. Hob De Vinnv carelessly tosses dear Floyd his winsome way with witnmin. Florence I.amherton, with kindly wishes for future success, gives Ruth McMnhon her Saint Thomas Academy ring if she won't lose it. Lyman Swrndaon leaves Ids map of Sweden to Helen Rodwell. Marlowe Gieseke won’t leave Albertine hut Is going to take her right along with him. Art I.ampland, with extreme grief, yields his imitation leather briefcase to Albert Killeen in case hr might use it. Donna Constance Kurtz, with pathetic heart-rending, leaves her snappy expressions to Miss Penrose. Ruth Thorshov weeps a hitter tear hut decides it is best for her soul to give her maidenly blush to Louis Nash. Ticrnlv-Four