United States Military Academy West Point - Howitzer Yearbook (West Point, NY)

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tVfcfcY BRIDGE THAT HE MKES fjTHER BVCKLE3 OR BREAKS.” Department of Civil and Military Engineering PROFESSOR Coloxki. CiirjrrAV J. Fikiikgkh. Cadet, t’. S. M.A.. 1875-1879; appointed from Ohio; graduated 5; Second Lieutenant of Engineers. 1879; First Lieutenant, 188:?; Captain, 1891; Professor of Civil and .Military Engineering, U. S. M. A.. 189fi. ASSIST A NT PHO FKSSOR Fiiist Liimtkxaxt William A. Mitciikll, Corps of Engineers; class 0?; graduated 1. INSTRUCTORS Fiiist Likitkxaxt L. rio:xt i: V. Fiiazikr, Corps of Engineers; class ’0?; graduated 0. First Likctkxaxt Hakoi.ii C. Fiskk. Corps of En-gincers; class '03; graduated 3. Fiiist Liki tkxaxt Ji’i.ian L. Siiii.ky, Corps of Engineers; class '03; graduated 7. First Likutbxaxt William I). A. Axntaisox, Corps of Engineers; class '01; graduated 2. Department of Practical Military Engineering, Military Signalling and Telegraphy INSTRUCTOR Caitaix William P. Wootkx, Corps of Engineers, class '98; graduated 3. SENIOR ASSISTANT INSTRUCTOR First Likctkxaxt .Mark Brook k. Corps of Engineers, class ’(0; graduated 5. — 18 —

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: lll'THE 1909-HOWITZER irtLnjrlJai------- 1 —------------- “Of man’s first disobedience and the fruit Of that forbidden tree, whose mortal taste Brought death into the world and all our woes.” EKI‘i we to be deprived of this Department to play the role of anvil in the daily rendition of the Anvil Chorus, the loss would he irrcmcdial. There may he some who believe it more sinned against than sinning, hut these have seldom possessed the temerity to voice their protest in the frequent meetings of the wieldcrs of the sledge. Hut though the efficiency of these architects of our fate is so frequently called into question, none can deny the diversity of their activities or the reality of their omnipotence. They inquire into and interfere with the peaceful progress of our daily lives with a thoroughness and an attention to detail that inclines us toward a belief that the hairs of our heads must he numbered. From prescribing the character of our handwriting to compelling our use of white shirts- nothing escapes their careful surveillance. And as to their omnipotence, could this he better shown than by the instructions of the Com. to the effect that “the guard will he relieved at sunrise. The sun will rise at 4.80:” or the order that Patton so unhlushinglv published, “No matches will he left in the pockets of clothing sent to the laundry as they may take fire by order of Lieut.-Col. Howze?” Beside such powers ms these the medieval magic of one old scout, Joshua, in making the sun stand still, sinks to insignificance. As plchcs we shivered fearfully over allusions to dark prisons, lig! t prisons, and other methods for the punishment of wrong-doers, hut none of us have ever been called upon to brave the terrors of these ordeals. But one relic of the Inquisition still holds sway—the area. Those ingenious Spaniards who plied their trade with thumb-screws and the rack never devised torture as exquisite as is the lot of the miscreants who pack gravel in the area—“sentinels without a charge”- during a big football game. Lastly, it. is the Tactical Department whom we must thank for the compilation of our Vade Mccum—the Blue Hook which defines so succinctly the metes and hounds of the straight and narrow path that leads to Christmas leaves and the decorations of quilldom. Our venerable ancestors who drafted the Constitution on which our fatherland is run could not compose a document one-tenth the length of the set of rules and regulations that prevents the Corps of Cadets from going to the delimit ion how-wows. — 17 —

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“This text-book is designed primarily for the cadets of the I . S. Military Academy, who arc being fitted for a profession in which the principles of civil engineering are of daily application. K Gods! wlint a prospect. If this be true, graduation will bring no relief and we are destined to grow gray while groping our way through an interminable maze of strains, stresses, moments, and shears with no other guide to our faltering footsteps than the inevitable Cambria handbook. Must we believe that a second lieutenant of the white stripe variety is supposed to hold himself in constant readiness to build anything from a chicken coop to a skyscraper upon demand? It is a most appalling prospect. The path of the faithful few who hold up the bottom of the class is seldom strewn with roses but here they encounter an additional impediment to their peaceful progress in the shape of an increment of five tenths on the mark required for proficiency, increasing it to the formidable proportions of 2.5. The expedients adopted to escape this stumbling block have varied from attempts to speck, entire, the tables in the Cambria, to making frequent trips Vassal-ward to get a physical conception of the Poughkeepsie Bridge (one goat's explanation of his monthly wanderings in that direction). A watchful Kate has decreed, however, that all knowledge shall not be gleaned from books by the creation of the practical (as opposed to the impractical?) Military Knginccring Course. Caesar bridged the Rhine, so history tells us, but in all chronicles of his campaigns we find nothing « worthy of commemoration in song and story as the feat of crossing the Hudson on raft composed of empty beer kegs. As instruction progresses, little outings are planned, and the surrounding landscape is sketched and mapped with varying degrees of accuracy. 'Phis work results in a familiarity with clinometers, pedometers, hexameters, gas-meters, and the staple locally known as a P. M. K. lunch. In the last case, familiarity breeds contempt, and usually, indigestion, for this delicacy is an appetizing concoction, manufactured of most durable materials—one orange, two bard boiled eggs, one' bologna sandwich, one mutton sandwich impregnable alike to digestive juices, teeth, axe or dynamite. — 19