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Page 11 text:
“
IO THE GARNET mysterious and awful god from foreign clime, who decorates the soli, tude of the woods and whose portrait embellishes our cover, has taken charge of the destinies of our class, and has granted Eighty-six ever¬ lasting prosperity;—not because Eighty-six is the only perfedl class ever matriculated; not on account of our surplus of intelligence and genius ; not for our industry and piety—for what count makes a god of human frailty or excellence?—but because, at our earliest oppor¬ tunity, by the bended knee and uncovered head of our class-mate and representative, we implored the protection of the grim-visaged image, and enrolled ourselves as the first class imbued with the sense of his might and power. Our service to our tutelary deity is not without the sanction of authoritative precedent. One morning our late president upon arising saw, staring from his lawn, the ghastly countenance of his precious idol, bedaubed with paint and otherwise disfigured by some nodlurnal band of sophomores whose barbarous instinct had impelled them to pollute the pious property of the Potter. Horror-struck and in anguish the heart-broken Doctor gave vent to his feelings in the exclamation which has served to assure us of the faultlessness of our selection of a guardian angel:— My god, the idol!’
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Page 10 text:
“
Gcjitbriaf. THE editors of the Garnet regret the necessity of forcing upon ■ their intelligent readers a worthless book as the result of their exhaustive efforts in the production of what was intended for a literary marvel. For a due appreciation of unfitness for allotted duties and for lack of self-esteem the members of the Garnet board of Eighty- six will be conspicuous among the undergraduates of Union, in as many of whom as are his inferiors Perk, has been successful in incul¬ cating proper and sensible ideas of humility. Garnet boards always have been unfortunate in their membership, but the avowal of their poverty of ideas has been reserved for the editors of this volume. It is a well-known fadl that when a student, during the first two years of his course, has not received by the suffrages of his class-mates those desirable honors which it is in their power to bestow, he is slopped over into the Garnet board as an a6l of propitiation and retribution. Of such stuff are Garnet boards made, and in this annual repetition of history Eighty-six has proved no exception. Although well aware that the greater number of copies of our very large edition will be read and criticized by the vulgarus multitudinous , whose opinions are of little value, yet for the few copies that will reach our cultured readers, whose faculty of discrimination carries them farther than external appearances, we beg lenient judgment upon what we consider a poor book, even though it is the best Garnet ever issued. Surely, if we may not receive praise for our work, we are entitled to the encomiums of our friends for our modesty, for our acknowledgment of the sterility of our mental resources, and for our freedom from editorial duplicity. Our Garnet is dedicated directly to the idol and by implication to the class from which its editors are selected and which, in a measure, it represents. From its earliest connection with Union Eighty-six has been closely identified with the idol. In return for our devotion, the
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