US Army Infantry School - Doughboy Yearbook (Fort Benning, GA)

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EIHGT O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING fMondayj Senior instructor in charge steps to the dais. Gentlemen, the first monograph of the morning Will be given by Captain Mac- -ff-fl--'TT Swat. I-Iis subject will be the retreat from I ls - South Greenlandfl ' ' j, ,A Business of crunching chairs, etc. ,Li J The orator emerges from the rear of T the room encased in large white folds of X sheet metal. ,A I-Ie slips on the ladder to the ros- Titters, chortles, and guflaws. ,. A voice: Ride 'im, vaquerol Orator regains his poise. A majestic array of charts, bold with red, green, blue and black un- fold themselves before the gaze of the audience. A voice: Wot's he goin' to give us? A lecture on trajectories? Orator: Gentlemen, I am not much of a speaker .... Voice: I-Ionesty is the best policy. The speaker leans Adonis-like on the pointer which bends as the bamboo of the tropics. Orator: As I said I am not much of a . . . I The pointer breaks. The speaker simulates the movement S of going from the standing to the prone in rapid fire. Uproar. Voices: That's too bad: he was getting on so well, wasnlt he ? I-Ie didn't look nervous to me. Thatls what corn will do for youf' S ' Gentle hands aid the speak- ' er to arise. Gratorz I'lVIy subject is the invasion of Basutoland in s'o U5E 'TN SHORT ENOUGH T0 BE wren- . esrm ,sr T c, , 1917. As you can see from this ,EU C' 'U' WM ENOUQH 0 New TM' Sw J 3 glen:-74,' ' f '-' f 0N0GRnPn .LIKE A snoni' smfn-P

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map the Doogy River Hows from this er, er . . . the Doogy Hows from . . . well, l musta left it off the map. Voice: H.-Xn intermittent stream, probably. Orator: .-Xnyway the river Hows. Now during the invasion . . Hushed voice: You don't say so! That one at the Cricket? Orator: During the invasion the 57th Gherkins, Colonel Heinz in command. got themselves into a hcl. . .a perfectly awliul pickle just at this point. Into the body ot the map a red arrow is stuck. Red arrow immediately describes arcs. Orator makes vain attempt to halt movement of the column in so doing placing pressure on the center ol his theatre of war. The northern sector relinquishes its thumb tacks and droops, not ungracefully, over the head of the speaker. Mulslil-ed voice: 'X-Xs l said the 57th Cjherkins reached this point. The speaker emerges from the encircling folds. Voice: Just like the unveiling of the star at the Follies Bergere, ain't he? Hushed voice: l'And I waited outside for her and we went to the Grand. Qrator, preserving the even tenor of his way: 'H-Xnd there was a terrible battle. In fact, it was somethin' Herce. The dead was piled up in heaps and it was an awful sight for . . fl Roars of laughter from the sixth squad. hlember of sixth squad: l'Tt's a good one, ain't it? Some traveling salesman told me the story on the train. Hushed voice: W7ell, after the show . . .U Stern voice from the rear echelon: Your time is up Captain Niac- Swat. There will be a five minute break, gentlemenfl igh t 1 529 gilt T