Tuscola High School - Tuscolian Yearbook (Tuscola, IL)

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10 THE TUSCOLIAN a modere child’s bedtime story Amos: Andy, Ah is now gwine to tell you-all about a bullfight Ah once seen in Spain. Andy: Alright, then proceed wid de lie. Amos: As Ah said once before, dey have dese bullfights in Spain and Mexico in an arena. Andy: Did you-all say Reno? Amos: No, Ah did not. Ah said “arena”; Reno is wheah dey git divorces. Andy: Ah understan’. Amos: Well, de fust thing, dey bring onto de field de bull. He done has brass knobs on his hohns to make him look fierce. Andy: Ah is begin to get interested. Amos: Well, de next thing out is de matadoh. Andy: Well, what is de matodoh? Amos: Well, he am de guy what is supposed to slay de bull; understan’? Andy: Uh huh. Amos: De next guy on de field is de picador. Andy: Ah s’pose he am de guy who done carries de pick an de shovel to bury de bull an matadoh with. Amos: You is de craziest blockhead Ah done eber seen! Andy: Maybe you is right, but go ahead wid de story. Ah spose de next guy on de field is de cuspidor. Amos: No. De bull nor de matador don’t chew tobacco. Andy: Well, ain’t dat too bad? Amos: Everybody is ready for de fight when all of a sudden de bull charges. Andy: Why in de heck don’t he pay cash? Amos: De matador whips out a brandella and sticks de bull in de back. Andy: Dat is a good sign of rain. Amos: What is a good sign of rain? Andy: Why, you done said he whipped out an umbrella and put it over de bull’s back. Amos: Andy, yo’ is crazy. Ah said he whipped out a brandella an’ stuck de bull in de back with it. Understand? Andy: Yes, I believe Ah is. Amos: An den de crowd starts cheerin’. Andy: What for--de dead bull? Amos: No! For de brave matador. Andy: Shut up yo’ mouth, Amos. Ah’s regusted. odoencliers of o little boy onct upon a time thair wuz a little boy hoo had at berth bin kristend eugene hale. 1 day he set out into the wyd wurld bi his littul selfy. he started akross a teeny weeny brook on an old fut log but he saw his own littul selfy in the water, he thot it wuz a kross angry stranjur. so he turned arowned and went bac to his momy. (Willard L.)

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THE TUSCOLIAN 9 the king’s bell Once upon a time there was a king named Kollins, who wanted all of his Junior-subjects to be happy. He therefore decided to erect a tower on the front gate of the royal court, place a large bell at the top and issue this decree: TO ALL ROYAL SUBJECTS OF MY TUSCOLIAN KINGDOM: BE IT KNOWN THAT WHENEVER YE WISH LATE ENTRY TO THE CASTLE, YE MUST RING THE BELL, UPON WHICH THE JUNIORS WILL APPEAR AND JUDGE YOUR CASE. The next day the bell rang, and when the Juniors came running to see who was late, there stood Marian Baker. “Why are you late?” asked King Kollins. “Someone stole my equilibrium and as I couldn’t walk to school, I had to get down and crawl,” she explained. “Who is the thief?” the King asked. Marian looked about the crowd and soon pointed out Edwin Bradbury. “Is this true?” the King asked Edwin. “Yes,” he confessed. “Then,” said the King, “you shall give her back her own equilibrium and yours also. Is this a fair decision, my good Juniors?” And they all replied, “Yea, yea.” Two days later the bell rang again, and this time Virginia Ro-mine stood without. “Why are you late?” asked King Kollins. “Miss Frantz required my sewing to be done today and I couldn’t get it finished in time,” sobbed Virginia. “Juniors,” demanded King Kollins, “what is your pleasure in regard to this case?” “Your Royal Highness,” said Julia Kennedy, “I propose that Virginia be given a seamstress to assist her, and that Miss Frantz be deported to Siberia on a charge of cruelty.” “Yea, yea,” shouted the Juniors in one accord, and the King replied, “It shall even be so.” For many days the subjects in the castle lived quietly and peacefully. Then one morning, just as the tower clock struck eleven, the bell pealed out noisily. To the surprise of the King and his Junior-jury there stood the leading social lights of the Junior class: Elizabeth Norvell, Martha Seip, Pauline Bruno, Marie Compton, Ruth Hawkins and Dola O’Neal, each with a favored Junior boy at her side. “Do you mind telling me what I can do for you this morning?” asked the King gently, for he didn’t wish to show the slightest displeasure to these, his favored subjects. “Oh,” yawned Marie, the spokseslady of the group, “we had a party last night, and felt that it wouldn’t be doing justice to our work to come while we were still sleepy.” (Continued on page 14)

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THE TUSCOLIAN 11 can you imagine Billy Hardin walking around quietly? Maurice Owen sitting up straight in his seat? John Norvell and Lewis Belles studying in the fourth period study hall? Frances Ford not hunting Pauline R., and Pauline not hunting Frances? Emma Jean, slender and tall? Glenn Quick not asking someone else what Miss Deer just said in general science? Miriam Beall not telling every one to take a shower in P. T.? Wayne Hardwick not reading a library book? Erma Snider not giggling? Miss Mernitz grouchy? Ruth not thinking of Don? Palmer Cox smiling pleasantly? Bernice Loyd with straight hair? The Science Club letting out when the bell rings? Pupils walking quietly out at noon? Raymond Baker not trying to out-talk the teacher? Wayne Neal not on detention? —Wanda Lincoln a freshman's enqlish theme A girl is walking down the street. She is singular; you are nominative. You walk across to her, changing to plural. Then it becomes dative. If she is not objective. you walk in the plural. Her mother is accusative, and you are imperative. You talk of the future; she changes to the objective. You kiss her hand, and she becomes masculine. Her father is present, things are tense, and you become a past participle. freshman psalm Miss Wells is my algebra teacher I shall not pass. She maketh me to show my ignorance before the class. She maketh me give proofs for my grade’s sake. Yea, though I study till midnight I can learn no algebra. She prepareth my “quizzes” in the presence of lofty visitors. She giveth me a lowly grade. My work runneth over. Surely “zeros” and “conditions” Will follow me all the days of my life And I shall dwell in the Freshman Class forever. —Carmoleta Chapman Nursery Rhymes Vincent had some paraffin gum It was as white as snow And everywhere that Vincent went His gum was sure to go. It followed him to school one day Which was against the rule Miss Sluss she took it from the lad And chewed it after school. —Pauline R.