Tulane University - Jambalaya Yearbook (New Orleans, LA)

Page 24 text:

We come then to the Senior year. Besides those things which are now too famous to repeat, the members of the Class have been verj ' industrious, and have accomplished many worthj deeds, of which the world at large may have no knowledge as yet. For instance, Guthrie has bought a new suit, fresh from lyondon, and was given a triumphal procession through the halls under umbrellas; furthermore, he has discovered an unfailing remedy for insomnia, which he tries on all occasions, especially lectures. Cully Scudder has oifered to wheel the Professors ' baby carriages and act as sub-nurse. Dixon is pursuing his antiquarian researches in bones. Johnson is assisting him with his experience. Allison has been running a successful truck farm on his upper lip. DeBugs has spent a fortune on hair tonic, but we can not guess for what object. Vatter is still on exhibition as the only living sea-cow. Carter is a professional smiler. L,amberton has been having his hair cut b3 ' degrees, and is training for a professional beauty. Dufour is doing a little of everything, and not much of anj-thing. Payne is chronic. Evangelist Bill Whittington has composed a new prayer, and the others have been degenerating, to the entire satisfaction of the Class. Soon Tulane shall lose her most glorious Class; but in the far future, when the last member of ' 96 has at last succeeded in killing himself, there will be a grand reunion on the banks of the Styx, and after electing a successor to Satan and the chief angels of hell, a taster of brimstone, a chief engineer, a manager of the women ' s department, and other necessary oiScials, the class will take possession of Tartarus and run it, as they have run everything on earth, on approved end-of-the- century principles. Historian.