Townsend High School - Optimist Yearbook (Vickery, OH)

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iiWif.,,,,,,, One day last week, I think it was November 20, 1964, I reported to work at the Times , iln New York, that is.l I do that every day since I have become their star reporter, though that is neither here nor there. When I arrived for work I had a new run to cover so I started out. First stop was the local police station. My! there had been a terrible murder during the night. Glad it's no one I know. But who is the distinguished looking gentlemen talking to the police chief? Why that's the new and very popular 'private eye! We hear he's a whiz!! It's Raymond Loyer, another J . Edgar Hoover. He tells me he'll have a fine story for me if I want to go up to the police lab while he has some clues examined. So here we go. As we step into the elevator whom should we find but Teddy Riley. It's only two floors up to the lab, so we don't have much time ,to talk to Ted. He doesn't even have time to tell us how he happened to change his ambition from 'truck driver' to 'elevator operator' A we enter the lab, I'm reminded of the lab back at dear old T. S. Everything is so familiar. It even seems like home seeing Maynard!!! What am I saying??? Well, what do you know?? It is he. Obviously Maynard Logan never got away from his test tubes. Back to the office to get the murder story in. That is barely completed when the boss calls me into his office. Although society isn't my line, it seems there is to be a 'Cinderella girl' wedding today on Long Island. So I hurry out. It seems New York's multi-millionaire, Sir Patrick Judge Cdon't let the 'Sir' fool you, he's the same one who graduated from Townsend in 19503 is being wed to his former secretary. I, for one can hardly wait to see the lucky girl. Here's his home. Now, all I have to do is get past the doorman and all the butlers and maids. It was a struggle but I made it and it was worth the effort. Oh, Here Comes the Bride . My, she looks familiar. Where have I seen that face before?? For goodness sake!! It's, yes, it is, Irene Welch. I wonder how that happened. She's Mrs. Judge now!! On my new 'run there is a modern high -school. Klt seems from everything the students around the school tell me, that it's a modern school except for three exceptions. They are, I'm told, three old maid school teachers, who 'never have changed their ways since, at least, the year 1955. My, my! I'm not quite sure whether it is safe for me to stay around long, so maybe I'll make agquick exit. Whoops, too late, or else just in time. I think I just heard a minor explosion. Back into the building, up the stairs, and, oh no, it couldn't be in here, this is just.an assembly of the school. What's this?? the assembly is for Teacher's Day , maybe there is a human interest story here. It won't hurt to step in and listen. The principal is presenting the teachers and they are going to make short speeches. First, hesays, we have our beloved Math teacher, Miss Ward, followed by our Home Economics teacher, Miss Fey, and then our ancient history teacher, Miss Horning. Have you guessed it?'Z You're right. It is Hazel, Doris, and Catherine, but I'm sure!they're not the three exceptions the students were telling me about. S1111 ,567 i Sl X3 QQ

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im? Again, I go back to the office. And now I have an assign- ment to cover a new Broadway show. It is an oddity because the entire show is made up of only three people, and no one has ever seen the faces of those three. They wear masks during all their many acts. And what acts!! They do juggling, singing, playing instruments fpiano and two guitarsjg they do whole Shakespearean plays in pantomme, they wrestle fthough every- one thought that went out with televisionj and they even get around our national laws and conduct give aways. They're called the SLC's Cpronounced Slicks J and brother! they really are. What a show!! good for a matinee. But now that it's over I think I'll go back stage and try to see these gentlemen. Here's a dressing room with S on the door. I'll knock. Three beauti- fully harmonizing voices answer Come in. So in I go. Oh, no!! What to my wondering eyes should appear but the SLC's without their masks who are no other than: Simons, Joe of course: Lutes, Wayne: and Carey. Which Carey? Frank of course. We re- minisce a bit and I find out all the details of their once agvain joining forces and combining talents. It seems Joe wasn't making out so well on his ranch in Texas, Wayne had given up farming shortly after graduation, and Frank, well, his story is too sad and long to relate here. A If I hurry, I can just make it ,back to the office to make my deadline. Something seems to be holding up traffic, My good- ness, what's that marching down Broadway,--a parade? I'll in- quire of this lady here. Yes, she says, it's a parade. A parade of iome Ohio farmer and his 15 children plus a cow. This I must loo into. Calling one of the children aside I asked, what goes on? He replied, Dad lost an election bet. Oh, and what's your name? I said.. Wayne Lortcher, Jr. was my answerq That does it. Another day like this and I quit the news- paper work. Things like this aren't even worth that big, bold by-line that says-Carol Thayer. QQ The End. Q 3- If f , A , - xffff W fi' xi'