Timmins High and Vocational School - Porcupine Quill Yearbook (Timmins, Ontario Canada)

Page 109 text:

83 - The PORCUPINE QUILL Act V New Prospects For I dipt into the future, far as human eye could see. Will you come with me for a trip to 1960? What you'll see will shock you, what you'!l hear will thrill you, and what you'll feel- well, you'll see! We're on our way! You ask what is this strange machine We ride in? You thrill to see the land ten feet below you, and marvel at the speed? Why, this just a Celeriferm. It was invented 'way back in 1945, at the time the scientists discovered Phlanyx, the harness of air and gravity. Ah! I see you recognize the district. Yes, we are in South Porcupine, on our Way to Timmins, where I'll show you unbelievable changes and incredible inventions. In one minute we'll be there-And here We are! Don't be frightened! This ten-by-four ce- ment enclosure which seems to startle you, is just my Celeriferm's house. You see, when this machine was invented and when every' one got one because they were so cheap, the town knew they would have to find some way to house them. And so what once YOU knew as the Cyanide is now a resting place for every Celeriferm in Timmins. You see how the tiny buildings are built on such a slope and at such an angle that each Celeii- ferm flies right home from the air? Quite diferent from the old aeroplanes which required a whole lot to slow up in, are they not? But come, we must not loiter. You have only one hour to stay away from 1935, and I have much to show you yet. You stop, you stareg you look aroundp at last you exclaim: It this our Timmins? Yes, this is Timmins. The Timmins of 1960. I suppose you wonder where the garage is, the entrance in 1935 to Timmins. But You for- get! No cars are needed now. And Itum is sold instead of gas-itum, which sells at 3c a gallon and which lasts for a Week. Would you like to inspect the tiny building where it is sold? Well, here We are. Will you meet its manager-Mr. J. Brovender?-meet?- but I see that you know each other. I am sorry, but I am afraid we cannot stay. And now I have a splendid treat in store for you. We are going to visit the Timmins High and Vocational School. And we shan't have to walk either. We'l1 simply step on one of these ever-moving revolving sidewalks and- presto! we'll be there in two minutes! We're there-yes, we are-this is the High School. You don't recognize this immense building, do you? Mr. Jacques Sauve, the principal, has ar- ranged a tour of the rooms for us, and if time permits, weill visit one form of each year. No, no, you don't have to walk-not in this school. Do you see this small two-seater at the door? Every pupil rides to his classes in the morning in one. He must be there at 11 a.m. sharp. One mile down this hall and we'll be with Form IV-May we come in, Miss Haines? You see the machine in the corner of the room? It is a sound absorber. The voices of the pupils are absorbed in it, and thus silence is maintained. Now we're with Form V . The chap with his feet on the desk is Mr. L. Chisholm, who is giving an illustrated lecture on The Bene- its of Sleep. We'd love to stay and hear it, but time flies, and so must we. Wlould you like to see the auditorium, with its tiers of seats and magnificent pipe-organ? Perhaps we'll even hear Mr. G. Darling playing the Moonlight Sonata, While Miss J. Stibbard vainly tries to teach h-er class to tango to it. .Would you like to?-but alas! The clock strikes 33 the classes are over: and your hour is up. JESSIE RAMSAY You'll find school jokes to the very end of The Quill

Page 108 text:

82 The PORCUPINE QUILL - When the Slip Gets By The typographical error is a slippery thing and sly, You can hunt till you are dizzy, but it some- how will get by. Till the forms are oIT the presses it is strange how still it keeps, It shrinks down in the corner, and it never stirs or peeps That typographical error, too small for human eyes Till the ink is on the paper, when it grows to mountain size: The teacher stares with horror, then he pulls his hair and groans, The copy reader drops her head upon her hands and moans- The remainder of the issue may be clean as clean can be, But that typographical error is the only thing you see. DOROTHY FRAPPIER, C3 Miss Richards- Have you your Algebra book here, Keith? Keith Powell- No, Miss Richards- No what? Keith- No Algebra book. A4 Mr. Fawcett Ctalking to one of his pupils who had been working for some time in an ofliceb How long have you been working, Clare? Clare- Since they threatened to tire me. PF ale ,lf Francis italking about Pat?-What I ad- mire her for most is her exquisite taste in per- fumery. Anne-I see you let yourself be led by the nose. gr :lf Employer fafter dictating a letter to his stenographer, who had been typing rapidlyif All right, Miss McGrath, please read the let- ter back to me. Orva ttalking in a frightened voice?- Please sir, would you mind dictating that letter over again. Employer Ctaking his feet off the desk and biting his cigar in half in his angerl- Wlhy on earth do you want me to dictate it over again. 'Orva Qbursting into tears?-Oh, please sir, I forgot to put paper into my typewriter. Latin Teacher- What is an octopus? Jack Dewar- Please, please, I can tell, it's an eight-sided cat. Hanc hasta haec for Missus Est to his ante Bella for sum lux. A dum CLLI' nox the puer fallo on his nec. A fui,' mons Hanc for his nos is ntun and he is viri and sic. Leslie Thomson had received a bonus mark for his Latin sight translation. Said Mc- Kenna, Shouldn't that word be bonum -- a good thing? Oh, no! replied Leslie, for who ever heard of declining a bonus? Portrait of Our Pup Teddy, Teddy, rough and ready, Always bad, but always steady, Knows no manners, heeds no scorn, Has been loved since he was born. When he's bathed he takes a chill, And runs around as though he were ill, Bares his teeth when he tries to smile, Which makes the children run a mile, He barks when angered, and runs when scared, And accepts a iight whenever he's daredg He likes to chew shoes and tear boys' pants, And whenever he does it, they caper and dance. He has a large voice for such a small dog, And while eating his meals he's a bit of a hog, The teachers all love him, Cof this there's some doubtb, For when they are passing he puts them to rout. He has many ldog friends, some good and some bad, When he's wearing his dog-coat they call him a cadg As for cats, he hates them with all his might, And whenever he sees one he puts it to night. All things considered, he a bit of a, pest, But of all little puppies, we love him the best. I-IERBIE LANG-DON

Page 110 text:

The PORCUPINE QUILL , District Managers: Mutual Life of Canada SULLIVAN SL NEWTON tEst. 19125 Insurance of Every Kind Security Service Phone 104 21 Pine Street North CG ldfi ld Bl k Timmins? Use this space for Autographs Phone 915 P.0. Box 1215 W. T. MUNTGCMERY Custom Tailor Suits Made to Order on the Premises S 20.00 and up Individual Dry Cleaning and Pressing 1 Cedar Street North Timmins, Ont.