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Page 30 text:
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1938 THE MOUND BUILDERS NONSENSE JOKES Lucille: I saw something last night that I’ll never get over. Kathryn: What was that? Lucille: The moon. Roy: I have a lot of electricity in my hair. Melvin: Sure it’s connected to a dry cell. Mrs. Macombs: Doris, will you please tell the class what an octopus is? Doris: It must be a cat with eight sides. Mr. Humphrey: I’ve come back to buy that car that 1 was looking at yesterday. Salesman: What was the dominating thing that made you buy this car? Mr. Humphrey: My wife. Leta: Dad. What’s an athlete? Dr. Nelson: An athlete is a dignified buncn of muscle entirely incapable of shov ehng snow or carrying out ashes. Art: Dan, What is a grudge? Dan: It’s something you keep an auto- mobile in. Curly: These are my golf socks. Bob: Because you weaa them when you play golf? Curly: No, because there’s a hole in one. It. seems that Roy Langel stays at Nelson- ville over the week-end. I wonder what the big attraction is up there. Mr. Calvin: Johnny, why did you come late? John Coley: Oh, I saw a sign. Mr. Calvin: What did the sign say? John Coley: Slow down. School ahead. Mr. Kail: It sure gives me great pleasure to give you 85 on your history test. Tom Hart: Why don’t you make it 100 and get a real thrill out of it? Arthur Ellis is trying to make Kathryn Groce jealous by going to the skating rink at Amesville (Don’t worry, Art, you can’t make Kate jealous). Bart Keeton: I just can’t think who wrote Ivanhoe. Idabelle Wallace: I’ll tell you if you’ll tell me who the “Dickens” wrote “The Tale of Two Cities”. Mr. Humphrey: How do you cut an apple into thirds? Roy Langel: First you cut it into two pieces. Then you cut the halves in two. Mr. Humphrey: Yes, go on. Roy: Then you eat one of the pieces. Miss Cone asked Clarice to write a short composition on “Water”. She wrote “Water is a light-colored, wet liquid which turns dark when you wash in it. Mr. Cree: John Coley, what does HN03 signify? John: Well, er. I’ve got it right on the tip of my tongue, Sir. Mr. Cree: Well, you’d better spit it out It’s nitric acid.
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Page 29 text:
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1938 THE MOUND BUILDERS 1938 NONSENSE 3£MZF 3P WMMM Z55 I GROUP NONSENSE A storm was brewing. Walter’s ocean wave was beating against Clarys’s shore. The good ship Coley was bravely battling the great storm at sea. Captain Keeton was trying desperately to cheer the frightened newly weds, Mr. and Mrs. Arthur Ellis (Kathryn Groce). The frivolous Fierce was in the kitchen trying to cheer Cook Cocky; but just then Rhoda came trucking in and Dorothy blinked out like a light. Reverand Calvin told Margaret Brammer to do something religious, so Margaret passed the offering basket. Lucille MacDonald was singing in her high shrill voice, In The Sweet Bye and Bye”, and God Be With You Till We red hair, and shouted f-f-f-fire.” Idabelle Wallace taking the fire extinguisher from the wall soon quited Dan, thus saving the day. John Krivesti, walking across the deck at a 45 degree Langel. met Mr. Jones, who was intoxicated on the Junior cake, (5 pieces at Prom), and chanted Lord God of Hosts, be with them yet, lest they regret, lest they regret”. Through Odey Ellis’s faithful praying the ship was guided safely to shore. But wait. - The grand finale. Racing down the deck was Togg Hill and his bus. And w,ho is on top? Oh Yes, - I see now. It is three of a kind. Marian. Helen, and Rhoda; their clothes are on backwards, their shoes are not mates, the color harm- ony is outrageous. And as they did the Big Apple” around and around the top of the bus. a large whale opened it’s mouth invitingly; the three waved good-bye to the audience and leaped into the bosom of the whale to join Jonah. Meet Again”. Dan Armbruster. looking through a port hole sighted Oden Ellis’s 3 Just then Melvin Mcore came running across the deck crying Athens Mess- enger”.
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