Tenney High School - Torch Yearbook (Methuen, MA)

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ME-LITTLE JOHNNY JONES Qjust so highl . l l. Fictional character created by Mr. Goebel for the sake uf illustration. ME-But surely you've heard. He discovered that Mr. Goebel had established by syllogistic reasoning that he was a juvenile delinquent. He felt he couldn't live down the reputation, so he gave himself up to a life of eri uini - . It was terrible. He robbed CHERYL BOWER's pharmacy. WAYNE Wil., SON's variety store, BOB TAPI..IN's furniture store, El.I..Y J.-ICKI.IN's bakery, CARRY MILL's joke shop, IIIITCH DYEAK's used ear lot. ELAINE BAI.CIUS's travel agency, JOE R.-II'AZZO's barber shup. and CAROL MAl.ICNACGI's laundromat. MM-Shocking. ME-He almost put JOE VELLARDIT.-I's drug store out of business bv clearing out all the movie magazines and James Bond b avnw ks. MM-Atrocious. ME-He robbed DON ALLARD's bicycle shop, WALLY I-'l:fUCII.I.'s insurnxui company, TONY TARQUINIO's hardware store, WINNIE I-fDW:IltD's flu- ral shop, JIM HURLEY's department store, LOUISE WORTIIlNC'l'0N's ice cream parlor, EDDIE WLODYKA's lumber yard. JUDY I-fDII'AltIlS's cafe, DICK LAW's shoe store, VIC JUBINVILLE's s n-rx- ire stati ruii, DICK KISlEL's music shop, JOE MITCHI-ILL's dairy, RIIONDA I-'LI-ZIIIlNG's dn-ss sbop, JOHN l ARO's real estate office, EDDIE KUPII-lC's auto ri-puir shop. FRED PATRALIA's bus company, RON S.-IRAO's garage, 1 iiin I the TIIOMIS P. COYLE Fidelity Fiduciary Bank. MM-Despicable. ME-He swiped DIANE DIOD.-I'l'I's Mustang convertible. MM-Deplorable. ME-He drew moustaches on Senator JOSEPH LeCLAlII's campaign posters. MM-Contemptible. ME-Worst of all, he plagiarized some of NELDA KRUKONlS'a p twr- try. MM-For shame! ME-Then one night he broke into Tcnucy High School and really caused havoc. He entered CAROL DeLUCCA's American History class rmwmv in und rewrote the grade book. MM-Shocking. ME-You're repeating yourself. Then he went into JOIIN lIIlCHAUD's or- chestra room and switched around all the manuscripts, so that next day when John passed out the sheets and began to conduct, thc uiolins started in mildly on the Peer Cyn! Suite while the trumpets were going strung on King ol the Road. MM-How fiendish! ME-He did practically the thing at Larry Dube'.s record shop. Hu switcl ie't I all the labels on the records. Which, by thc way, is the only reason JOI-I IACI was listening to a Tchaikovsky concerto a few days later. MM-Egregious. ME-That's a good word. He cleaned all thc erasers in IRENE LI-1VER's mathematics classroom, so when she rolled down the patterii to iiiii lu- thr- graphs on the board, she couldn't work up any dust. It so unnerveil her she almost didn't give homework. Almost. MM-Unspealrable. ME-Then he invaded CARL WINTERS's English classroom and destroyed all the MANTER HALL books. MM-Well, he couIdn't bc all bad. ME-Then he went to the main office and really raised... caused tr qiii hle. You know how they have four very efficient secretaries there-JEANNE BESHARA, MARY ANN GROSSER, KATHY HOUSE, and CAROL EL- WARD. He 'repoaitioned all the keys on their typcwritcrs. Next day they typed the most atrocious things! Well, by this time thc principal, JIM SCIONE, was practically in tears, and thc vicc-principal, TOM MEYER, was so upset he almost gave Miss Lever detention for walking in th-- corridors without a pass. All the faculty were upset. The driver-ed tv-aclu-r, BOB DESROCHERS, was picked up for inattentivu driving. The gyni teachers, DICK SAVASTANO, and PAT MOTTRAM, were so confused thry forgot to send their classes to thc showers: thc students w rrrrz ao conluiu-il they took showers anyway. PAT GARVEY, thc dean of girls, was on th:- verga ol a nervous breakdown. She decided she ner-ded he-lp. She wrote tu LEE DENNISON, the advice columnist, who suggested, na usual, that who should lee a reliable psychiatrist. So Miss Garvey nsluril a couple ol the teachers CHERYL WADE and SHIRLEY SIMOES, il they knew a really good Uhcadshrinkvr, if you know what I me-nn. They both rccommrndr-il ,- -'- f ROR S.IIlI'I'iIiI. Su she went tu hint in great eotifi-It-riref I-ut when Iu- began to shuw her his collection of lieads, she ran sereaiuiug from thi house :ind hnsn't been seen since, I'S'l'lII Ii IAIIIIY ri-plneeil hi-r un the faeulty. Of course. uuril ul all these lmppeuiugs passed iiiiinevlintrlx to thi school ri-ruuiittee that is, IIONNII' Ilvtili IFRFN, Iitlli SI INI IA. GISOIIGIT IIIXGIXS. I7 IYIIT WAI KITII. .-II IN KIRKII IN, 'l'lII t'ISI'Y and I Illxlllx lllbl I tiho were :tppti-I-ri.tti-II inilignnnt Ivr fright luwnntis, reeoiiiiiiemli--I at relentless si-.irrh fur the culprit, and p.i--rd nu In their u--xt item of Iviiwliivss. I'Iw crisis rutile-I for .irtmii Irvin the r.ip.iI-le I-.-.mul --I selretliieli: that is. II .IN SII IFIVII. Jlllt' S II'II'Nl I, .ind I'0II tili III III Su they uit-'il the I'u-sid--nt .ind .iske-I that II.-thu--n I-e il- I I.iti .I A disaster areal Johnny Jones uns iuunedintelv plneeil on the Ii-t ul II--st II'.int.-il llritninals In the ren-tml rliir-I ol the Ii.Ii.I. liinisr-II J tIIIISt Iilllilfli I' IIIISUN. ,lulinnv il.-ri-I-'tl the uisrst thing: to do It-'ul-I lu- I.- sltip off lvv plane to San Irrilu-iw-v. Iiut he had i-Iwi--u-Ii n--r ku--un In- niur-t ruruunti-r ilu-se tivu fearless str-ii.ir-less-'s of the uir, 'I'I'ililiI IIIINI lIl'I1 :lnil I'IIfIxI lfli III I-'lIIiII. Illini r-'iw-,giii.'--il lnni iilitrieilmtvls .intl stent Ivrentlilrssly to the pllul, l'.IIII. Nllilll OSI, who r.tiIuu'iI the puller nnil turned the plane hurlt tu lin-ton. In-nuns.-, as lie put it, the inptuii- ul the Iinlt IIIt'tIII?l nothing to nie, lint I Ilnti' tu sur' ton lun uitliuut your rhnrniiug sniili-Q. .Is ,li-linux tru-.I tu Ili-v the pI.iue, hi- un- init I-I tivo polireluen, lxlNGSI.IZY ltllitlll and IIIN .I. IIIIN IlIl'If. Ile I-i--Irv into u run nnil ilasln-d into at tIt'st'lIt'il Ivullillxig nrxttlli. 'l'h.tt new Ins luistnlri-, It-I he did nut lt'llIIll' that thi- t't- tislt iii- liuu uf that wry I-uililinrg had Iwi-n supervised by th iisr- lwu tthaiult I ii-: ru-uli in ieiv nipatraihle uirluti-I-ts 'IOII llIl.l-il.I.tl :ind .IOI-I IHIIIIIENLI. Su, of t-rv urse, net he sl: iixiiii-'i I the il-lor, the uliule building i'ir Ilupsr-il, JIFII IIIIUIIN dir r-i- ted his I iiiir -ml. l I IIXF SCIlUliIilt'I' of the United I're:1a Internziliuuul was the first journalist ul uuy note tu get hold uf the stury, und she wun ii I'ulitn-r I'inre Iur her reporting. :IIsu. JIIIIY IIUIIINS wrote n I vivii It ul iivii I Johnny uint-h I:--t a very Invurnble review in I'.I'I'liICI:I IIeI'I'iI'IiII.IU':4 i'rv Iul lili uf the .Yfni lurk Im i4'x. .-IIILIINI-I liI.O'l'NI-fli is preparing it I-'ngtliy but rather guud I iilt' ni along the lines of John Jones' hotly lies Il'IlI0itItlt'IIllj1 in the grave. St-vernl of niti r fins'-riuites i'.i n he I iiiilii I ul the Iniliu ii:i pulis Sprriluut. IIICID IIIII.I.I'lII is n spnrtsvrlsler tht-reg IIOII I,.'IlIlI.'I und I'IIII. SlI I.ItZ,I are drivers! uuil II.-II'I'1 IIUIIGICIIS, ,-III'I' lI.III.iII.:INIC, und DIN IlIIl2II ure I iim-r' hunirs. IIICIIY I-'AIIU is n j ivi' key ut II tit' ltiuglinnl. I'.II1I. I'.-IYSON and IIOII II.'IIIII.-IIIIIIC ure II:-gislry olfirrts und lI'1IilIY l'UI'I'IN runs n 'Turkish Iiulli. JANIC IIICNNIS niuriienl our nntlvn-wmlor lu annie IIIIIIIU' nounrenlule ruuntry ur other. Anil n Int of iiii r gxurlmitit .--peiinlly the girls-liave ar-rved in the I' i-iit4i- llurpa: I rn'ir ple like t1.'I'IIIY Il,'III'5UN, IJIANIC WAI.Kl-III, JUIII II'lNIll.I-I, SUSAN W.eII.SII, III.'IIIY Ill-.I'INI', CANDY N.-ISS.-III i iiwtr r llnndy, she elisuppruri-tl it ivii it-win-le in thi- Middle l'uriIic 1 ixin I wus lii- ver I ii'i ird Inuu nguiu. A Iut of 5 vi'ni ple uuutril I'lil'5I IJI-.Nl' lJYI'.II IU IIIMY-Dyer? You il lixi 'I lii:-i in lIII'l OI r'riii rise, Illtlli DYI-III. NM- Nut nur hlli UI i'ii uriu-. Wlu-re have you Iwi-n' Mhlglrm-Il i'c' tivi-lyj I knew his nulue wn-I llyer, hut I iin- ver tl iiii ight Ipnusr-I Anyway, Illll glurl y siii I rii' ntion:-nl Iiunily. MIC l'ni riii t. I I iiii 'rn't 1'ii ten in Ihr v-i- I iivuir sr, 4 irii I the vi-ry w -vlr I uuilsf--1 luv' MM 'Nu, r iir. Iinntly Nuiiul. I It iini w vthut ltupl I1'ti:'t I lu I ir'r. 'llh.it'- vsliy I ennn- In-re. MIC--I know. Shi-'ro I it-1'ri Itidunpl -v-4 I hy ng -'ii l-4 ol IIIIIIISII, und 3 -vii 'rv lu--It ing Iur thi- IIIAN I riiiii IVNt1l,l4. hlhl Uh, do lu' qulrt. I i'1l I II4' I i1'r1' In I ilin I you ME Sn wliut hupl ii-l led tu luv? MIII In-t r ltn' nlnrt nt lliu- In-gi llli ing. Ili tin- Iinllny tr-:pu-1 nl Ihr- I'n1iIn U i-1-i in, just si lvli tliwext ul :viir -tnl-' ol Ilnwuii, Il -1 n - liiii Il i-Inn-I II uni 4ll'4uivl1r4'il 1':i rly in I975 lay tl ir:'1' nnilnr-1, ,-IItIlIItfII. lIINl'.NI' IIIIY, I Il' 'IUIIN I.I'lIINAIIIl IIIIIGIZS, iiriv I I'III5'l' lII.fIII'l ltttltlltl IIIIIII-. swim li.i:I l i1'1'i i nrt nulrilt by l iuii li nir-i-r -4. 'lln-y tl iiixi I -.if Idlfd into-1-1 III lIIt: 'l I wh:-rv tnnnly nn-4 living, N-iw I. iiii- ly I iii- nlwuyw I i.i- I dr-:uns --I I1-ruuup a , ,,,, qi,-I yn ,-,- I ,,,,. I html rltriri- I .i-r I.-it apii iiiiv'ii i-1 th-re In v-t-ill will than ilu- 'IH riiii- y ,grail i-.i if-'I in thi- I viiir nl iluni gui tv-ig-lhfr nn-1 vpn-ily In-g iiri npr'-niliug the a 'iil il 1 iiiiiiii g thfir Ifln-in ul IU03 that thin- vnu- n lu-'ly Iittlv' lslnnrl in thu' I'urlIlr' that Iluy I ivi- I :Iwi 1-I- r-il nn-I vs-rf' MIIIHUI 'I'IIIII'l'lfll'IA. 'Ihr ni-Irfl gg liini p of 'Ilrnpttupinnn ggrml ilri Ily intl-li-HI -iv lh-ll now llit-rl' nrr nlmut I00 grnulunlro living un ilu- I-alnnfl. 'lh-- nrli-ti. alillng

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Class Pro hee P 7 Ily Mark Eaton and Mike Mesrobian Scene: London. 1980 '- -I Oh, Ihrr. r Ii rr-f, You I. rr- trrrifir on Ihr- stage tonight. Tlirrre linsn'I I.--o :I IIinII.I -In , . I-II ICI- hurl Ilurtr-n. I kwin, 'lluink you for r luiniling Inf '.IXl Inuit vor ruin yfiiIIflirs.1vli.llu? XII I r:in'I. I I-:-I rfrifl .ru .irli-le sxixirig Ilia! :ill L5 niusr's If-ntl to lie snoli lo-II. ftnil I rlrrlfl want If. rontrnrlirt our public image. It's nice to ser xi-in Ili-ugh Io-.fvrlrzw rfrognitionl Mike! Ifow rirr- you? W'liy 1lirln'l you VIII no f II1-w lint- I-or Irfrnf XIII II non I-I yur- uit osrr to Ilir- Hript I may tell you III' III-. thi- l-o-ioI-- I- Ji lion. After you'vI- rlifil twenty times, r-vi-n that gil- mllwr dull. Ikhfn I finally Ilir- for r1':Il, I think I shall lie intl-nsrlfv' onintrrf-tfil in th-' I.irI. tl-o, I mi-s Alf-lliuvn. XIII llo '-on git In go lizirk tlifrr' Inu' Inf' XII No, Iirirrllv :II fill. I still slilv-crilw lri tht- Triliurle, Iliougli . . , iI's th.- oulv pap'-r I -:rn Iiurl Iluit pvilili-lim 'Wlortv XII-fklr- so I know it lol of ttI...I'- UI-ing oo. XIII Iikr vrlhil? 'til Xlfll, I-Ik -.iq l'vr- nuvv li 1-f-- I in the -I fyu' irly page-I that many of our vin-- limits haw -ufrrfvrl li:nuI-owne nnrl pro-ljurun-4 hnsh:uul-. fTliey'vr- overlook'-rl nie so Izir, liut Ihr-v linvr- Iounrl quite ri few good ont-s.l I Iintli-r-Alaml Iliut lltltlitltt SIII-UXIIIII, JOANNE SINIILI, JACKI SINIONE, DONNA WI-IIN IIOIII. I'N'I' !tl'I tl.'t, K.-X'I'IIY O'IlIIIIiN, IIAIIIMIIA IIICVIN, l'AT I..-XXI. llI'It'I' Xltl'ItIfIuN I'IiI.I.ICItIN, LINDA JAWOIISKI, IIIIV JORDAN, DAR- experience with harbors, so I think Jim is fairly safe. NINIiI hi-ard that RODDY HODCE has quite a reputation in intellectual circles now. He wrote an essay on, er, dialectical materialism. Nobody knows where he ever heard of it, but he's an authority on it now. Even THEODORE T. ZAKIA, the noted government theorist, marvels at it. ME-Indeed. MM-And, of course, you must have heard about FRANK SIERPINA'S suc- cess in television. NIE-I never read theater news. MM-Oh. I was reading it in Variety just today. Two years ago he became the twenty-third person to host that midnight variety show nobody used to watch. Now It has the highest ratings in America. Teachers and students alike are now falling asleep in the classroom, and labor unions are pressing that no one be forced to get up and go to work before 10 a.m. so people can enjoy the show. Parents don't have to worry any longer about their daughters not returning home from a date by rnidnightg now she rushes in at ll in order not to miss the show. That is the show in which both JOE DIZAZZO and JOE SOUCY, apparently two of the hottest recording stars of the decade, made their spectacular debuts. It was there that BILL BLOUIN really established his reputation as the greatest thing since S rrnx py Sales for so the paper saidl. Now even CHERYLLE ACKROYD is persuaded to sing on the show. And the interviews they have are supposed to be fascinatingg they've had RUSSELL COOLIDGE . , . IIIIIN FOIIIIISS, Il'lJY FAY. KVXIIEN fIAT'I'I'IAII, AND PEGGY 'I'OIII.A 'till-Wf'Sn 11ef-Pffsiflffnf? .irr- :ill r.frrIir'ul:irlv wr-II-inzirrif-rl. I ju-.I lmopr-n to run'-inlwr offhanrl. MM-No. no, no, no, no. He was the astronaut who took a wrong turn on XINI Wlintfv-r linpj r1-r1f': I In P.-XIII. IIIIIIKE? Dirl he r :-rl1: tin it solemn I nflv In-lor fr-4 lu' vowI'rI'f XII Nlzirriv-II. Sf-verzil I-liilrlr 1-vi. lint hr- tin :ifforrl it: liv's n niilliounirr 'IIAI Ylill Ifrvtai ir'-l?l I' tlll I Ilurkr-IYI MIC Oli, y --s. Ile invent'-cl a Ivrr-:Ikfn-at t-t4 rr-ul r'nII+'d Jerry Crunr-lir'r. III forum in n -rpm-ifil liol rnllv-rl tlir- Sydney ffrirlon, tlr-signed liy TONI his flight to Mars and discovered a tenth planet: he hasn't been able to return yet, but they sent messages back and forth. And they had SHERRI PATRICK, the German scholar who found an exception that doesn't have a rule, and JANICE SAWYER, the Nobel prize-winning chemist who recently regained the attention and admiration of the world by discovering a fantastic new way to prepure chicken-asparagus casserole. C0l'IfjXI H,,,,5j,j,. ,mug MEM I knew shc'd make good. As best I can figure it, about thirty of our XIX! ll if'i I how il -ilv 1 it sell! MI-T C -iuvf I slogans: IANI-I CIIITICOS is in 1-lmrge of pulilivity. Suri-ly you'vr Iifziril of I--rrv fir iiyiu In-r. II'-niriinlwr the cont:--t free trip to the Ilivivra 'Ihnt M -ii I rorr hug, I'I 'I'I'1 IIAYIIOW tl if-ii ght of thnt. 'KINI Oh. xi-s. I rr-I vuf- nil n:'r. Who won? 'III' VXIIOI. lIOI.'I'. II'e quiti- n pr rwrvi i rii-ii I t'tu rporntion l':1nl luis. ,II'IlY SHUI. NOIINII SIACK, : nrit I JOAN N.-KI'Ol,I :Irv on the honrrl of ali- rwlors. DIN II. DONAIIIII-I is the official Instr-r. Thr u-1- other IlllIIlIlIlIlIfl'!4 nn' IIIIIN I'NIIIS Cl-flIrtlD YVIJIIIIIVAIID, :Intl JOE ANCI-1I.AlII. JW' -.nw hr- just wi-ke up onr- morning :intl found he was rir-li. Since IItf'rI graduates are secretaries. MARIE CARTA, JUDY JASKOT, and NANCY MATTIIES are lr-gal secretaries: the rest are rather shady. There's BEV CAMPOLINI, NANCY KAELIN, LINDA MeCONIGLE, PAULINE TAL- BOT, STELLA ROGELIS,-they're medical secretaries-and PATRICIA COTE, LOUISE COLTRARO, JOANNE KITSAN, SUSAN JURDI, JUDY VIGLIONE, SUSAN TURMEL, LINDA DIAZ, KATHY CARRICAN, ANN MARIE CIOSEFFI, LINDA HEBSCH, ANN NOVELLO, BARBARA NAN- NIS, MARY MURPHY, ELAINE MONFET, BRENDA MALBON. SUSAN WOODCOCK, CAROL ANN WARING, and TERRY SOUCY. NIM-Y arii just happen to know that offhand. Ilirrrr haw In-I-u fnnin-nie nruoonl-4 of rnourry oII4-rrrrl for hi-4 In-II, hi- ME-Yes. And, if course that's not including MICHAEL TORBIN, who is pnjnrimu. nnvl his pillowvnru-, lint it -wi-Iris tlir-rv was more in it tlinn nor' lIIrII:IIIII1lIgII. XINI II'Ior I...,.,..iu.-.I I.. IOIIN It.tIII,IsK.I? 'III' Ile'-4 It rlortor now, lo the gr:-:it rl:-light of PAIII. CIQIIVAIS, who li nn uorlirtukrr. no-I lu the gr:-nt Ili-light of IIONNIE PFCIOW. who ninkr-N -:i-R-I-1 What :il-to .Io I k vui-wt' 7 IOYCIX IVAIINSIIAW is :I nurse, as nr.- IXYIC ININOYIIN, IINDA NOIINI.-IND. ,IOANNI-I PITAIISON, IIICTTY CET' l'III'lI, IIAN I'OI'lY, III-IIIIIICVN IPICIIIIIS, SIIEIIA l-INTON, AND IIIDNIY IIII XNILI-'lI. D --ii1i: I is n prnr-Ii :':1 I nurse Ihr- ri-st nrt- mtlir-r frivo- I i-vi -, IINI f'll4lNI Y is I fxir I+ f-r. NANITY SNIIIII, SHARON POTVIN. VIII-IIYI. WIRING, l'XI'IINI'f IIIAIIOIIIS, DONNA MKIITINICAII, DONNA NIIIIIS. Il-'KY Nlllllfll, IINDK NININIO, TIIISIIIK KFNNFY. NINDF- ll INI-' ltll Xlllflll-', Il'IiII III IIS. l K'l' IINICII. nnrl NANCY FITZ- XIKI IIIII' I irr- :III I rf':vux tiriulivl. I just linpj uv-vt lo know that offlvrlnil VV If viv-l Iii v--' fl-1-, 'II--II iii- u iviii -I ln- rl: iiit lrufl fre-- Nll IINI WU1NI'II I- ir ixi- ltfrl in n Iril of n r'-ivi I vvix ' fr-v. I iiiii Ifrstnnrl. It I -'row hi- il.: io- Iwi l vzix I- urilt f'ii no or -v-vv- Itzi iszi III-rl 'I'Iu- Ilnrlwr of Algiers, 'III'-H 'Intro I'roI XlIf4.ivIorv wrote il for Ihr' II'-ntl:-s In pr-rfornl. IIIII lvl'-I the S t-t' retary of State. Now don't stop mc+I'm just getting warmed up. For a I't-tmii ntants there are KEN FOSTER, JOSEPH KUS, DENNIS TOR- RISI, and BILI, RICKARDg also JUDY MLECHKO, ALICE SMITH, CLAIRE McCAlI'l'IIY, GAII. PICKLES, JEAN ZANFACNA, and JUDY ROZZI. What else? Oh, yes. DAVID GORDON, EDDIE SARFDIE, KEN IIOGANNAN, BOB MeCRACKEN, and BILL DOOLEY have all gone into engineering: Dnve is said to he the only civil engineergl guess that means hr-'si Irttiri' polite than the others. WARD HASTINGS, MIKE CUSTARTIS. LARRY CIINNINC, NORMAN COOK, DAN NELSON, and KENNY AU- fII.AIII are alll I nrrt' ste-rs. MM In the snnie nrva? ME-l'ni afraid so. You rnn't sec the trees for the Iorcsters. BILL TOOM- EY is nn astronomer. PHYLLIS STOKER has gone into banking. Jack Milner is it disc jockey in the fine tradition of Wacky Jacky and juicy l'Irucey. LINDA FELDMAN is teaching kindergarten. RONNIE HAMEL, RON I.nI'I.ANTE, JIM PARE, nnd IIOLLO PELLETIER have gone into the nrrncd services. Ilfascinating, isn't it?l AL DEMERS is making his living with r-nrds-birthday, Christmas, get-well, he sells them. JIM ELIAS is running :A jewelry store. His, of course, was the first place John robbed. for II I'- -IIIII-ult Io inirpinr- l',iuI lmting mon- llmn the lr-out pot-.ilrlv MM-John?

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.f HU- lmnivs tl.:-y built was typically-tropical air conditioned grass huts ,:' ' ii, V .1 i, not' fl rl---ignfirs as DICK D--SIRIONE, CR.-HC l'lElllAN. -l Y- IHIIUIWY, and HOB IIENLEY. Blfcmwlxile thrcc of lhc wnrld'5 1 I r bfi nr-lntftts JOHN BERCEIKON, l'Al'L SHAHEEN, and BOB ,wfJlClCl', rffllnlmrntvvl and planned the fantastic layout for the capital, 'Ji ,:1. 'Il,f, -tyling nl lin- fily is outstanding for its graceful linw nl -.nip-l.4ity', and the wlwlf- thing looks vu,-ry tropifal. All thc landscaping for Ill l-wil-lings thfrf- was rlunr' hy' HOU Olll..-XNDO and JAY CUTICCHIA. l'l-ntu of li riif- : ixx- l r iifi my is sp'-nt on rut'-alional facilities, and thv'y'r, I -, rw-V,-ri ff ' ill Ili- I fiiif llflg iivi 3 Milli Luk un- 'lllll CXHUN. lllf.K Ntllfl, llilnll lll',lllll'1Y, DICK l.A'l l'lNVll.l.E, DICK Lohlliilif DU, lllf,K 5l. UNCY, :mil 5llKl'l ST. l. lL'lll'fNT. Transpnrlallon lo and fr fivii the n ifif ll-rn fapital is tlw- responsibility of the Tropitopian Depart- lnfnl of lr. ivi- giwrtltiuri, lnllvr ln rifi un as tht- 'l'.lJ.'l'. This urganilzllion has ns it- lfauifrs giants oi the world of lnigll linanu- and business. 'llw Il nfli rlrv 4 ll ol tlw- lmard is nunf- other than l'llll,lP McKINNlS. His ollif-'r-, .a - left group of people n 1r'i' ting the strictest requirements only l'lul 1 fili ld wt up, arf- .lAQlQl-LLINE CUILMET, NANCY HENDERSON. UAH, l'0l,IfQl-.l.l..-X, Dl.'lNl': ABEFKNIIKA, and ROSE JABOUR. ln tht' l iii- Ilxngg Nlauii, r,y.f4 ran Q i-f- the many bf-auliful slows and vxrlusivr' slump- Lonllring thf- -tr f-f- ts. Ar vifir ig th:-m arf- a boutique owned by the partners l'A'lltIfIlA l.allC.'KNf,l'I, ,lANl'l'l' VAl.CULfllT, and hlARYl,lN 'l'Ul,l.PlYQ n lv-alhvr g frri :ls -.hop pmprir-lor'-d by NANCY LANCTOT, VIRGINIA AXHFS, 4 iri- l DIANA HIKUWNQ and llu- most luxurious womens' apparel stuff' nu Ihr: world, J. LUCY. On JOAN's staff ol personally trained models arf- Al,lCli CAl.l,AlIAN, CAlll.0T'l'A C.-X'l'Al,ANO, l.lNlJA CONNURS. JUAN lfAll'Y5ll. KW, and l.lNDA CULLEY. On the olllrr sidr: of town rf--Ulm J. J. SAIIUACH, HAISERDASIIER EXCLUSIVE. JOHN's staff of nfliw work'-rs slums can-ful sf-lf,-ctiun: GAIL KOCZAT, SANDRA MARX- lliltft, Slllillhl. 0'CONNEl,l,, .lll,l. PORTER, and MAUREEN lllfSl'lAllA. Uni- of john'-s subsidiary companies, SIIAMBERCER-SEDCEWICK, INC.. rvigning lf-xtilv manufacturers of Tropitopian, has been partly responsible for thr' midi- sflwlion nl paltvrns and radical, last'-lul style so indicative of his m 1-rl hanrli-w, Also l fzc' ated in the city of lllauii nrc the offices of BKUDO Sl'.NllCONlJUC'l'0ll ANU 'l'lll'lllMOCONTR0l.S, foundrxrl hy thc famed r inau llu-1 ii:i tits gf-ning UVIDE llltUDO. Unrlvr tha- supvrvisiun of OW' HU! nutnmaliv- r-ngir iffr 'ru FRANK l'lCllEliA and RAYMOND FAEIKBER, rlrrc- tr viri ics rnpgi rir-r- rs UICIANDO SALXZAR and IHQRNIE HADLEY, and in- dustrial 1-nginwm Al,l.l-IN liUDlS and HARRY SIMPSON. The most rv-vs-nt contract of tha: corporation is with CHUCK llABEEB's crew of civilized rivil 1-nyinwrrs Wll.l,lANl RILEY, JIM EATON, and JOE Sll-'FElil.EN. Clxurlfs :lr-tigrxv-tl nn untlvrscu tunnel to the nearby Hawaii, and he necds sol riri nut iirii atic zlvvicl-s in lhv lunnv-l to keep the drivers' Spb:-d under l20 mil:-a an l irii nr! JOHN NAULT is one oi Chuck's apprentices. llis job now is to rliangzn- Ihr- light lfullss in tht- lixturvs insidv the tunnel: he holds thu- lnulh whlf- CAHM MARTINESE turns the ladd:-r hc's standing on. 'tllf Arr' th:-rv any night-clulnsl?f N151 Um- of tha- nmny exciting activities in Mauii is the nightly entertain- mwnt by the hr-:1v4'nlyAv0icl'd KATHY MICHAUD. JOYCE HALDANE, hav- ng rr-rmwr:-el li.-r vuicr-, has lu-rnmv a familiar sight in thu- drcss shops as f iushiuns. DON MORLEY, BOB PERRAULT, and tln- wining announce-r fi ltljli lllUNli'l l'l'1 haw' lim-n givvn an associate degree in physics. Thvy'vc 01,1-H.-tl n night as-html lor nlhr-rs like llu-msclves who can't secm to asso- rinn- pliyeir-4 with nnything. just on thu outskirts of Mauii .llilflf l3lllNK lin-1 fmnulf-il u lirnnil nf-w ,lullo Sclwlll. llf- still tvarllvs lhr- girls huw to .L-lrml llirni-4:-lv:-s in rust' nl nal'-'unrvs malls- by unruly native boys VIH like lvlf lirink!?l xrliim life- is quita- dill:-rrnt: lt is not unusual to src N151 lllnlmli. ln wnln . KATHY Nlellflliltlli pf-:forming the daily ritunl of putting out liftvvn l1llI.- ii-lm- wwry nn-ming. CllAlll.ll'I MESSINA has op:-nr-tl u Cordon lllvn rwtnurnnt tim! -tprrizililv-s in fum-ipgn dvlicncirn. JOYCE Gllllll-1ll'l' llflll J, Jfmiz mpc-ui-LY .mt ii... ,.nf...l.iv.- i.f,u.,t..-Q .mn n0NNn: coNDoN .ma Al,lll1ltl'ltlttIn1f- ffuvy' in llu- Knlulcnlun l.nung1' ' Nil, lnungf'77 Doing: what? MM-The tropitopian newspaper, Pineapple Press, is edited by SUSAN YOUNG. Under the management of JOYCE BEELEY are roving reporters ELAINE Lal-'LAMME, CHARLOTTE KATEN, AND SANDRA VIGNAULT, who cover the local news, sports, latest advancements, and gossip. Lan-sl bulletin has it the BOB CUSCIA'S PLAYBOY CLUB has formed its own set by-laws, constitution and canon. There is no need lor a large hospital in Tropitopia because the island is absolutely frcc from disrasv. llowvvor, ALAN GRAICHEN takvs care of any of the many unforsccn events which may occur on Tmpitof-ia. His staff of nurses includes: KATHY BUNCH, ANN CROCKER, RONNIE MARTINI-IAU, and ELAINE LEMIEUX. DOUG HAl,l.BAl,'lfR has a thriving dental profession going: JUDY INCALLS and CERRY RICKLEY are his pretty assistants. One of Tmpitupizfs largest industries is the world of its beaches. The cntin- ieland is surrounded by the mos! pleasant palm-studded coastline. Rcigning ov'-r this dn-am world is the C iii'fv nut Queen KAREN JONES with her atten' dants CHARLEAH MARTIN and PAT LANCEVIN, the Pineapple Princesses, ANN FINDEISEN has og ii-r1:' d an cxclusivc resort area on the bcavh when she conducts thu Tropitopian Aqua-ballet School, a culture unique tu our island. Pro-surf:-r DAVE WEIDLICH and his crew of birds TOM BRYANT, JOHN RUDIS, DAN GROLEAU, MARTY CARABEDlAN, and BILL BUKA. can be sm-n most often socializing with thc beach girls. BARBARA BLOllllN and CHRIS AKSCYM have a profitable little business teaching thc newcomers the native dances on the brash. PALILA COLDBLATT, SUE BLOOD, and CINDY ALEKEL have a novel entcrpriscga boarding house for delinquent surler-birds. KEN KUZMITSKI. BUDDY WALTON, and BILL COYLE are always busy training the Tropitopian Surfing Team for the International Olympics, With team members SHEILA RADULSKI, ROSE GIORDANO, and BARBARA HEBERT, wc expect to cumc back with a world's championship. BEV EATON and JOY DAVIS are the professional masseuscs for the poor, sore team members who are worked-out every day. STEVE BESHARA gives moral support. JOHN COC0, noted marine biologist, is always observed seeking new speci- mens lor his large museum. Also looking lor specimens, but of a different nature, is ED MICHAUD, pearl diver. Oncc a week on every beach there mu-t ha a luall and lici lnuu can lu' sut-cf-sslul with out a good poi-maker. PETER BASHKOIAN has gained a reputation all over the island for his skill in making every party a success-no better poi is to be found anywhere. HARLAN BRIGGS and RICHARD ASMECA help to plan thc programs of thc weekly luaus. ME-With all the fun and game, when do the kids get a schoolftypc education? MM-Extensive education is an csscntinl part of the Tropitopian society. JULIE MCKENZIE is superintendent of the school system and GAIL CIRAS is the chairwoman of the school board. Among the qualified and dedicated teachers in this excellent system are PHYLLIS CHIARENZA, JAY HAMI- LTON, MARCO MERANIAN, KATHY SCIACCA, KAREN TARDUGNOV and JO-ELLEN MILLINAZZO. BOB RICCIO, DAVID PLATT, and DEN- NIS LESCARBEAU are the representatives of the Tropitopian educational methods in the United States. HERB WAITHE is operating IBM Machines to schedule thc arrivals and departures of thc luxury liners of thc JOANNE LAUDANI Steamship lines. Herb also docs JANICE LEE KOEHLER a favor every day by asking thc compulor which colored clothes match wcll for her. Anyway, this is what l've been leading up to: Life in Tropitopia is everything anyone could dream for. Why don't you come on down? ME-'Mmm-mm-m I like that idca. .lust think, l could Bring Shakes- prarc to the South Sens . .. Hamlet, Othello, Cofiolanus, Macbeth MM-Oh!! fhurriedlyl Well, of course, there are some things l'd better warn you about. We arcn't entirely lrcc of disease, and it rains every third day, and ME-Nu, No, You've convinced mc. .lust let mc go back to the hotel and pack a few things, and I'll be right with you. MM-. . . thu trailic problem is bvginning to become unmanugcable, and , . l lNlS