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Page 22 text:
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4th Year Superlatives 1. Done The Most For Class 1992: Murdoch, Roeckell 2. First Person To Earn A Million: Gentile, Goldstein 3. Loudest Ties: Day, Rush 4. Funniest: Monahan, Beckinella 5. Most Likely To Have A Procedure Named After Them: Rogers 6. Person To Put John The Cartman’s Kids Through College: Monahan 7. Most Talkative: Hetman, Nichols 8. Person Who Has Changed The Most At PCPM: Calderonef Gonda 9- Quietest: Parmiter, Kaplan 18
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Page 21 text:
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The ARA classification and criteria for the Bitter Club 1. Honestly bitter on the inside as well as the outside (i.e. to exclude those pseudobitters who outwardly appear friendly, but on the inside are truely bitter). 2. Innate tendency towards bitterness (i.e. not cyclical or temporal in nature and without provocation). 3. Lack of direct eye contact by design (i.e. they can't be bothered; not a matter of insecurity). 4. Scowl or frown as a regular part of their persona 5. Takes an opposite position in a discussion 6. Lack of concern for outward appearance 7. Their honesty and directness allows them to demonstrate their bitterness without constraint 8. Always know where you stand with these people 9. Tendency towards sarcasm 10. Immediately responds favorably upon being offered to join the club (e.g. many people disavow being bitter by responding, Mot me”, but truely bitter people understand the nature of this offer and are honored. CLASSIC: This diagnosis requires 7 of the above criteria. Signs or symptoms must be continuous for at least 6 weeks. DEFINITE: This diagnosis requires 5 of the above criteria. Signs or symptoms must be continuous for at least 6 weeks. PROBABLE: This diagnosis requires 3 of the above criteria. Signs or symptoms must be continuous for at least 6 weeks. POSSIBLE: This diagnosis requires 2 of the above criteria. Signs or symptoms must have a total duration of at least 6 months.
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Page 23 text:
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10. Person Most Likely To Win Every Award: Rogers 11. Person Most Likely To Pronate: Bailey 12. Most Likely To Deny That They Have A Residency: Marino, Parker 13. Rear foot King Queen: Rogers, Tam burr i 14. Best Dressed: Trapolsi, Cuttic 15. Most Likely To Achieve Jay Schoenhaus Status: Gunther, Rogers 16. First Person To Have Their Picture On The Cover Of Podiatry Today: Becker 17. The Unsung Hero: Saetang, Murdoch 19
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