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Page 3 text:
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warned that these corrupt tyrants should not he heeded. Fortified with the spirit of a leader, armed for the first time with arrows of self indignation, the students rose from the slimy swamps of the south, the filthy metropolitan jungles, the bourgeois crab-grass infested suburbs, and — it was every man for himself. The principle of survival of the fittest was applied. Fisher was reported to he the first to grow hands. If he had also grown a tail the dental student might have at last reached the evolutionary development of the ape and mongalose monkey. IV. The Gypsum ami Felspar Diggings: An Archeological Finding The early dental students have conveniently left behind a great variety of archeological treasures. The primitive ami crude attempts of this early form of life to work and fashion copper is well illustrated l»y the findings of the ancient gypsum and felspar diggings of the great historian, I)r. Faggart, and his stone-breaking helpers better known as the Nairobi Trio of York. After many hours of scratching the ruins with his 17 explorer, many crude petrified stone squares were found at the fifty-eighth foot level. These stone squares may well he the first form of art the dental aboriginals contributed to the world. T he squares were all one inch in every direction and upon their surfaces were the simple carvings of this rapidly-developing civilization. However, it must he pointed out that as experts, we have calculated that to achieve the degree of accuracy these squares represent, many hours must have been spent in concentrated labor. After analyzing the results and time spent on achieving this end it is concluded that the intelligence of this primitive race was still on a very low level. Several clinical experiments were run in our laboratory using the Nairobi baboon as a test animal to try to determine how long it would take to simulate a stone square and carving. The results were as follows : 1. 0.758 percent baboons tested produced similar stone squares and carvings. 2. 0.167 percent baboons tested produced shapes other than squares. 3. 99.075 percent baboons tested refused to even consider making the squares and carvings, preferring instead to indulge in more practical physical and sexual diversifications. This is conclusive proof that the level of intelligence of the aboriginal dental student must have been at an all time low to even consider making the stone squares. Yet it must he pointed out that these aboriginals even tried to fill them with copper. The method of how the several copper inlays foil ml were made is a mystery that may never he unearthed because at the fifty-ninth foot level this primitive art is lost. We now find imbedded in the gypsum layer a vulcanite prosthetic appliance and voluminous nianu-scrits filled with a yet unbroken sanscript of jumbled words and figures. Around periphery of each well preserved leaf is again a primitive attempt at art displayed by the grotesque figures drawn in a crude hand. This must have been a time of political upheaval because some of the sanscript translated indicated this turmoil. This is illustrated by the following translations: Sanscript I Kipper, Go Home! Sanscript II Teacher a Q r Sanscript III No! I'll carve the turkey. Sanscript IV You are 1 8 dentists, that is, I mean to say, 2 16th dentists. oo (Continued on page 19)
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Page 4 text:
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'ii: r$g, LIBRARY School of Dentistry Presented by THE CLASS OF 1962
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