Taft High School - Eagle Yearbook (Chicago, IL)

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Mad Inventor Discovers Cure State Cuts In By Henry Green I The rain was pouring through the roof of Zruhcs High School and ln a dark room a man with every quality of a genius, except for brains was cooking up an idea. The idea must have been cooked too long because it stinks. - Oh well, so does this story-but enough of beating around the bush and on with this story. His name was Adolf Mussy. Hah, he cried out in a fiend- ish tone. I will test this prus- sic acid to see if it will kill. Mus- sy then takes off his stocking and captures a fly. He cautiously takes the captive fly out of his stocking, so he wouldn't hurt the fly and throws his stocking into the poison. The fly flies away as Mussy watches his stocking change color. Little by little it dissolves. It works, screams Mussy, dancing around with one foot bare. I'm a success--but now to use my acid for the purpose I have composed it for. Strictly Idiotic He leaves the high school and walks out into the wet streets. Ah! he says. My one foot will be dirty and the barefoot will be clean, so he rips a leg off his long underwear and it slips down to where his stocking was, and be- ing much satisfied, plods on. He starts to converse with himself, yes, I'll go home and get a good nights sleep and get in tip-top shape for the deed. He opens the door of his house, inserts the key and closes the door again. He ascends the stairs to his bedroom, unlaces his shoes, lays back the covers, fluffs the pillow to make it soft, crawls under the bed, and goes to sleep. Morning comes and we find our villian combing his hair with a wash rag and polishing his shoes with a dilapltated toothbrush. He rings the bell for his servant to make breakfast, then goes down- stairs and breaks a bacon and slices an egg. He rushes upstairs to feed his servant in bed. Gues I'll take a bath, quotes Mussy. so he puts the plug in the bathtub and turns on the hot water- Too hot, he says and turn on the cold water- Too cold, he says. Read the last thirteen words about nine or ten times and by that time the water has risen so high that our villian is almost drowned He spreads his ears and uses them for pontoons. He then paddles to safety outside the room. Later we find Mussy calling up Professor Baldy, another fiendish chemist. Mussy then pulls out a large pan and the two fiends start Ist Period Crowd Ends M'ckel Bus Trial T oo Much By J mnne Kirkland don't close that door yet- there's four more people trying to get on. So it goes every morning nickel bus the first period. Hey! on the Squashed and crammed, they hang out the windows and cower under the seats, and all to save three cents. Sad senior, once jolly juniors, slap-happy sophomores, and- one feeble freshie coming for an en- coreg all fighting for their allotted cubic inch-amazing how the sides expand! Back in the bus, the driver yells. But how was I to know which way was back? the midget sized fellow protested later from his hospital bed. The nickel brigade soon begins to operate. From all parts of the bus that hard earned cash is re- layed to the cashier fthe unfortu- nate soul nearest the nickel slotl. Woe be to anyone who pops up with that green folding stuff. At last! Napo1eon's underpass is reached' and the stampede really begins. From all over the bus physical wrecks stagger to the exit gasping for air . . . fresh air. The -rest of the day is spent get- ting back into condition for the next morning's ordeal. Is lt worth it? to conjure their prescription. 3 gallons of water, good dose of ar- senic, a touch of vineger for that nice taste, a bottle of ammonia, 13 tablespoons of sulpheric acid, 1 small bottle of peroxide, some hydrochloric acid and a bottle of iodine for healing purposes, reads off Mussy as Baldy gleefullypours in all the prescription calls for. Then they dump the stuff in the bathtub and stir with an old piece of steel, but as soon as the steel would touch the water it would dissolve. As three feet dance up and down the floor tMussy still has no stock- ing or shoe on one foot, so he doesn't let it touch the cold floorl the air rings with the cry, Suc- cess, I shall use it for the purpose is has been composed. Mussy then reaches for his tooth- brush and dips it into the bath- tub and starts to brush his teeths. It work, yelled Mussy after the doctors revived him, I have ln- vented a cure for unpleasant breath. Take Him Away The S-tate then took him to the police station where he received a copper cross for being the most in- sane person that has ever existed. Moral of the story-Pull out the bathtub plug if the water gets too high. Former Taftites Send News From Training Stations tCont. from page 23 As yet Tuck likes the Navy, but like all others, gets homesick at times. He is out at sea again and no word has been received from him for six weeks. Math Helped Marine Former Taftite, Tom Alcock now in the Marines has written the following letter to Miss Ryan. Stu- dents planning to go into one of the armed forces are urged to take heed of this letter. October 13, 1942 Dear Miss Ryan, Well I suppose you won't remem- ber me, but I was in your trig. class last semester. If you remem- ber correctly, I was going into the Army Air Corps, but I failed to fill the bill. So my next step was the Marines and here I am. If I can't fly the darn things I can cer- tainly be a navigator-och thatis where your trig. comes in handy. You see I had four years of math in high school and I never regretted it, even though I got pretty mad at times. LI suppose most of the boys in your class have the urge to enlist but please tell them for me that of they will only pay attention and learn what you teach them they will make something of themselves in' the Army, Air, or Signal Corps. I say the Army because the Ma- rine Corps is too tough to get into for that kind of work, such as a navigator, bomhardler, tor- pedo man or the like. As it was I got in by the skin of my teeth and had 'to talk them into it. So Miss Ryan will you please re- mind your classes to try as hard as they can and learn their math. The armed forces need men with mathematical knowledge. Believe me, anyone who is good at math may be somebody with bars and medals instead of cannon fodder or the like. Well Miss Ryan I have to clean my rifle and then go to bed, so I'll say good-bye, but be sure and let your students know what they're good for if they have a good math. background. One of your more non-intelligent students. Anyone who would like to write to Tom his address is as follows: Pvt. Thomas H. Alcook, Platoon 918, Recruit Depot-M.C.B., San Diego, Calif. More Powers to Marines Vincent Powers, of the United States Marines, has written a let- ter to let all his friends know that he is safe and 'sound somewhere across the equator. He says, If anyone tells you nwilling IB1 oin Buell if Dawn Patrol If you see any unhappy look freshman come strolling into building early in the morning, isn't because they have an ea program fcalm yourself senio oh no-they are the unwilling mt bers of Mr. Buell's Dawn Patri This select group consists those unfortunate individuals v found it unwise to impose on l Buell's better nature during his dustrial arts classes and ha As you have probable gathel by this time, the name Dawn . trol comes from the fact that dinarily these poor students do start until later in the morning. fCont. from page IJ So mark it on your calendar, To start on Hallowe'en night. We don't want slinking garb: lice To infest our house and yard The many germs they spre around We must really retard. And then their enormous appet From the food they eat, and sip Cause waste to such an extent It would build a battleship. So make a note of the date rig now, Help eliminate this curse 3 We've set the date for this ca paign On October thirty-first. these South Sea Island girls a pretty don't believe them. Last March 17th Vincent reach the age of 17, and the next day 1 joined the Marines. His address i Pvt. Vincent Powers, U. S. M. C. Unit 580 cjo Postmaster General San Francisco, Calif. Somethin' About A Soldier Another former Taft stude now ln the armed forces is Prlva Charles Wieder of the Arm Chuch is stationed at Louislan He sends word that he has hea: about the accomplishments of tl football team and ls proud of thel Letters from his old frienn would be deeply appreciated. H address is: Pvt. Charles Wieder 16068968 Co. C. 112 Inf. Reg. A.P.0. 28 cjo Postmaster, Leesville, La. Hero In Bombing Charlotte Coutre, 3B, is proud I her brother, Robert, a corporal 1 the Army, who was one of tl heroes in the bombing of the Its ian fleet in the Medlterranian Se

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'ul-svlivn uv, -1 -- D ii-1: B HIT- 1 114. sl..-fa '.,.. ug While Digging . . . First and foremost in the minds I all Lil Abner fans is the em- of Sadie Hawkins Day. eligible bachelors, such as PAULISI-I, WES PARKER, .ence aft's ORB IM SREDNICKI, ROY RIIS, JU- IAN BYRDY, JIM MEIN, ETZ HOMPSON, BILL LINGENFEL- ER, BILL BEYERS, JOE FLAN- AGAN, and GEORGE ZIMMA. :tter practice up on effective tmoflouge fSorry, we don't have mom for any more, so those bach- ors who have been left out were ot intentionally slightedj . . . Poor LEARA GUELZOW, BAR- ARA DAVIES, MARY ANN JA- OBSEN, VELDA WAGNER, and ,UTH KIESELBACH-after buy' lg a birthday cake, complete with sndles, etc., in the lunchroom for JACKIE PAULSON'S 17th birth- ay-JACKIE failed to show up . . . ..EDDIE PETERSON'S taking nittlng orders . . . Ever since his randmother knitted him a. sweat- r he's really been rushed . . . Then there's DAVE WHITTIER nd PAUL PETERSON, who, after laying thirty-six holes of golf, lscovered that the contest had een called off. DICK BOOS, 4B, would like veryone to know that when he was wo years old and had his tonsils aken out, the doctor said that they were the largest tonsils ha had ever een . . . just what this has to do rith the price of onions-no-one ,nows . . . BOB STENSLAND certainly felt illy when he came into English ate, and his teacher greeted him with He used to come at ten fclock, but now he comes at noon. Been While Snooping . . . AL RETTINMIER inserting ,laid seat covers into his model U' during fire drill - incidentely hat car is not a model, it's a hor- lble example . . . DORIS STEFFAN, wildly sal- 'aging newspapers from lunch vrappings for her journalism eads . . . BILL HEDGES, searching vainly or a good looking female upper zlassman.-Is he blind?? JOYCE MATHISON, 4B, and IHARLOTTE FRANK, 4A, walk- ng down the highway, wearing earmuffs, riding breeches, high leels, winter coat, and their hair n pigtails, one rainy evening. MARGE HOLLENHAHER, 4A, vith her three jumping beans . . . NORB PAULISH'S predictions Yor Taft football scores-hope rou're right, NORB .... The Quake Of the News By Flanagan 'n' Flum Famous Last Words . . . I dldn't know you were an M. P. Buck Private Torpedo off starboard. I. M. Sunk She can't flunk me. I'm not afraid of the Beta Tri- Hi-Y initiation. But Dad she's a tough teacher! This is only the first marking period anyhow. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Hot Dlggety Dawg. Dumbell Poem . . . If I had my way, all studies I'd banish, 'Cause I can't get algebra, history or Spanish. All I can do when I try to cram, Instead of studying for an exam, Is sit and be glad that I really am, Not the girl who can't get a man. We Wonder . . . How we ever got through Jour- nalism I. The Staff If Chief Lone West is still chewing his cardamum seeds. When hitching posts will be er- ected in the parking lot. If Dick Fel1's car really broke down on the way home from Cham- paigne. Woist Joke I Ever Heard . . . Will: Your wife says you get up with a grouch every morning. Bill: That's right, my wife al- ways gets up when I do. Pet Peeves . . . To have somebody turn on the cold water while you are taking a shower. The guy who writes the Prep Huddle in the Daily News and al- ways predict the Taft football team will lose. The Question of the Week . . . Will Taft gridders win the North section? JERRY OLLER, 4B, retrieving her shoe from the refuse box in the lunchroom .... GEORGE KILLOREN, 4A, and JOYCE DOLAN, 4B, doing calls- thenics on at street corner .... JIM SREDNICKI, 4B, making hash of Praise the Lord and Pass the Ammunition between ticket sales .... JIM SEMAR greeting his friends with a hearty, I'm rugged! . . . RIIS, 3A, got a pair of cords for his birthday, at present dashing around ROY yellow and is lunchroom showing them off . . . Too bad he can't walk on his hands. DICK DOEBLER writing an essay on Why an Airplane Flies .... ....PATSY FLYNN, 4B, teairfully Boy of the Month Due to his ability in his studies and on the Taft eleven, Mr. L. Hoefer has chosen for Octobers Boy of the Month James Concannon, 4B. Jim is a member of the mixed chorus, the Honor Society, and is a guard on the football team. After graduation in June Jim wants to join the air corps. He plans to go into some branch of service regardless if the war is over. He is quite versatile in the liter- ary world as he writes poetry and all types of short stories. He spent two years at Schurz before coming to Taft and there won a literary award. Being very sport-minded, Jim likes all sports, but mainly foot- ball. His pet peeve is nosey people. His hobbies are dancing and collecting odd locks. Jim's main ambition is, to have everybody like me and If I could, be a friend to all. Jim COI'l03lll'l0ll The Trib Presents Mr. Osbon Mr, Osbon Cornered in the study hall and informed that he had been chosen teacher of the month, Mr. Kenneth Osbon declared, I don't know what to say! But as the interview progressed, quite an interesting personality was revealed. At Taft Mr. Osbon teaches his- tory and civics, but he has had many years experience ln teaching algebra, geometry, journalism and printing. With a gleam of pride in his eye he states that he obtained his edu- cation at Northwestern University, where he acquired a B. of S. and M.S. degree. Before coming to Taft he taught at Schurz. His favorite hobbies are garden- ing and landscaping. He has a whole acre of ground to work on and thinks this should keep him busy for a long time. As for sports, he chooses golf, and claims he would follow that ball anywhere- even in or out of water. It's the Scotch in me, he says. When queried about his pet peeve he thought a moment and disclosed the fact that he didn't like first or ninth period classes. Frankly, I just don't like any classes, he quipped. Another thing he doesn't care for is stupid pupils, or divi- sion teachers who assign stupid pupils to his classes. Then becom- ing serious, he said that his real pet peeve is students who are in- different to the present world situation. He stated that he is really worried about the war and dislikes seeing any of his pupils act unconcerned about lt. He thinks Taft's football team is great and always enjoys seeing them win. With a smile he re- vealed the fact that a recent Satur- day was one of the happiest days of his life-Taft won their game, Northwestern won theirs, and' N0- tre Dame lost! taking the news that in order to be a full fledged GAMMA DELTA. she must have her hair cut in bangs .... NICK TRAGOS avoiding all his friends the day he to come to school in a suit. 1 . . ' fCont. on page 71 '

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ctober 30, 1942 Taft Tribune Page 7 Vlzatfv New P1 Fa.s'hions round Taft shlon Flash- rn Sadie Hawkin's Day No- nber 5, every Daisy Mae will wear in blue jeans, plaid shirt, L plgtails . . . you're on your 1 that day, girls! an While Snooping- .ed flannels in every size and :ription-for the fairer sex at L! .ed box coats everywhere and where . . . Iam'selle has her choice of ,ring cotton hose, or the latest ,ld leg lacquer to keep her ity gams warm . . . ispectlon tags on wood clothing :ing more and more like iues, with 10092: new wool as appetizer and milk wool as a arage. . . ee cream pastels made partly the new wool-like aralac sub- lce and partly of rayon-they washable and sporty: tops for vol or dates . . uttons replacing priority trim- g on suits and dresses. . . alluloid sequins of every color ering on evening wear . . . all heads from top to toe . . . Latest in Sweaters Stuff- atty Cameron's 3 new knobby sweaters--the favorite a olate brown that looks good igh to eat . . . prole Choltz' latest, an inde- xable, but beautiful tint of n . . . itching sweaters and socks, as Charlotte Zlmmer's sea n ones-she knitted them her- too . . . eaking of sweaters, you haven't anything till you've cast your on Fat Smlth's green plaid d Oscar RudoIph's mosaic ...- anne Wayne claims to have xagglest sweater in school, but res Comerford runs a close ld . . . -hoppers and Carry-alls- yllis Lange has the largest col- rn of purses: one for every I: . . . lda W3gIl6I',S brown felt bag e biggest one we've seen . . . ne doubting this may see Velda .g along a monkey wrench, she be a bit hard to convlnce3. rtha Nlestadt's scotch plaid bag is the brightest and at of all . . . lgator is more popular than for both bags and shoes, and o a sadly deflated budget G. V. have decided to raise their Anyone possessing a real live tor please note, Korzen's Classes Discuss Problems Concerning War Friday, October 2, the students of Mr. Joseph Korzen's history class- es held a forum on subjects of ln- terest to all. Students were picked by Mr. Korzen to speak on: Eighteen and Nineteen Year Olds in the Draft, The Effect on Schools and Col- leges, All Out for War, 'fF'ind- ing the Road to Victory, Com- munity and School in Defense, and The World After the War. These subjects were divided between four or five pupils from each of the third, fifth, sixth, eighth, and ninth period classes respectively. This is something' new in the way of enlighting the student body with what is being done to aid our war effort. Some subjects such as were found in the first topic gave rise to much debate. Also a sub topic of Community and School in De- fense, namely, Compulsory Mili- tary Training. qCont. from page 33 Leslie Robinson and Henry Bieber. Every student will have an oppor- tunity to win a scholarship. E From Broomsticks to Checkers Most of the art classes are mak- ing beautifully decorated tray mats, colorful letter or stationary con- tainers, and checker sets for the soldiers in hospitals. Anyone hav- ing stray broomstlcks around please bring them to school as the checkers are made from them and then colored. Art Classes Helpful in Making Posters What we would do without the art department is beyond me. They sketch posters, posters and more posters for school use. Recently Esther Klein has made some for the P.T:A. -membership drive while others have drawn posters related to the scrap metal drive. Patches Patriotic- The be-patched person is no longer a hobo but a patriotic cit- izen . . . Instead of throwing away that navy wool dress, which persists in fraying on the edges and cuffs, bind or stitch them in bright colors . . . To pep up that old thing that mom insists you wear, replace or reinforce the pockets and armpits with bright patches . . . For something really gay, pur- chase a skirt made completely of bright colored patches-but please don't flaunt them with striped or plaid blouses! . . . Miscellaneous Mention- Examples of morale-boosting col- ors shown this season are Barbara Frederick's french' violet, and Jeanne Kirkland s kelly green suit. What the Other Schools Have in Their Corn Dept. Teacher' fto small pupil3: Spell straight. Pupil: S-t-r-a-i-g-h-t. Teacher: Correctg what does it mean? Pupil: Without ginger ale. --The Hyde Park Weekly l ll 3 lst stoolie: Why don't you buy your boy an encyclopedia. -2nd stoolie: i'I can't afford lt. Let him walk to school like I did. The Creston Echo as 1 4 Recognition Said one fish to another as they saw an empty salmon can: Your Uncle Humbert-may he rest in peace. . . The Shore Line l K ! Fond Father: I can't understand my son. Always while going to school here at home he gets hun- dreds, and now he's in China he gets 'Zeros'. The Campus Corral fCont. from page 53 DONNIE PEDLER doing the same thing in the girls' red sweater he had to wear on a bet. . . LOU GLEASON, 3B, keeping the injured backfield company, by get- ting her knee thoroughly hurt .... Sudden Toughts . . . How does PHYLLIS COYLE, 3A, manage to remain so calm and col- lected when everybody else is dash- ing around .... LOCK, EHCELL, DICK SCHOES- LING, 1B's now you know better than to ask me to count to a hun- dred. . g. . BILL HOWELL, 1B, is either out- side counting the minutes till he can come in or inside counting the minutes till he can go out .... Wonder why the Daily News and the Sun always call us the Taft Presidents . . . Have you ever noticed how much banana caramels taste like nail polish smells .... We always thoughts those classy leather suspenders were a joint possession of DAVE and JOHNNY DALTON, but we've changed our tune 'cause the other day they both showed up with a pair .... In English 7, per. 8, the class was reading oratorles aloud. One boy had trouble in pronouncing Armistice, and Miss Carleton told him to pronounce it in syllables, zum-is-tis. JIM CONCANNON quickly replied and whose arm is 'dis? . . . All boys should beware of the deadly hair clippers of MARTHA RETTINMIER, 3B, after seeing the Ishkablble job she did on her brother. Groups Hold Elections of New Oiiicers By Dorothy La Gorio We really feel that we have been neglecting the Junior Girls' Club, and so this issue we'll put them first on the list of club news. Vir- ginia Kissel has been chosen to lead the club this semester and Jean Young is the new vlce-presi- dent. The recording and corre- sponding secretarles are Evange- line Dayiantls and Jean Rabbe. Suzanne Simpson will serve as treasurer, and Roza Ohanison as sergant-at-arms. The club, which is primarily a school-service club, will try in some way to contribute to the national war effort. A mem- bership drive will shortly follow the tea to be held on Oct. 21. Time Will Tell The election of officers of the Honor Society was held on Tues- day, Oct. 27. The votes have not been counted as yet, but it's certain to be a close race. A program ar- ranged by Betty Hodous and Rob- ert Smith, followed. Miss Ber- quist thinks it's a good idea to combine business and pleasure, and plans to have more entertainment soon. The Business World The Business Gulld's meeting on Friday, Oct. 16, was the time and the place for the Guild's discus- sion, The Effect of the War on Food Supplies and Prices. fSounds like important stuff doesn't it-3 Officers will be elected at the next meeting. Going Up ' Miss Gladys Pascoe's 10th period on Thursday stunt club ls really going to town! Marilyn Fisher, one of its members, told us that in ad- dition to learning how to perform various kinds of stunts, the class is now being taught the pyramids . Knowing how to stand on top of each other without falling is really an art-believe me! No, I didn't try lt. fCont. from page 33 All this has been about 320, but now, let's switch over to 301 where Mrs. Lino rehearses her chorus. The fifth period is the girls' chorus. These girls work hard, and the wonderful results they get show lt. Then the sixth period the Mixed Chorus under Mrs. Scanlon takes over and they spend a happy period singing patriotic melodies and choral pieces. For most of these young mu- siclans the happiest minutes of their school day are the ones spent in the instrumental and choral groups. They are creative and ln- structive minutes as well as enjoy- able, and students only regret that they are minutes instead of hours.