Sunalta Junior High School - Vista Yearbook (Calgary, Alberta Canada)

Page 80 text:

Mrs. Madden— What do you use for cleaning rugs?” Mrs. White— I’ve tried lots of things, but I find Billy the Game Warden—“I’ll have to fine you for fishing without a license.” Andy— I m not fishing. I’m teaching my worms to swim.” Warden— Then I’ll have to fine you for letting them swim without bathing suits.” 78

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QUALITY CLEANLINESS NATIONAL MAID BREADS - CAKES - PIES Always Oven Fresh National System of Baking Limited FRIENDLINESS SERVICE Department of Prevarication Expeditions that poke into isolated lands couldn’t find explor¬ ing conditions much more rigorous than Nicholas Stumpf, of Lincoln, Ill., did right on his own farm. “Winds kept blowing with terrible force from the mouth of a cave,” Stumpf relates, “and they were so strong that they kept every one from exploring it. I tried bucking the wind, but couldn’t stand up, so I put curry combs on my knees and crawled up to the mouth. It was no use, though, for when I turned on my flashlight the force of the wind blew the light beam right back out at me and I couldn ' t see where I was going.” “Waiter, there’s a fly in my soup.” “The poor thing must have lost its balance. It was sitting on the edge of the bowl when I brought the soup in.” “The other way down, madam,” called out the street car con¬ ductor as the portly charwoman was descending at the driver’s end. “You’re mighty fussy now there’s a war on,” grunted the erring one, as she turned around and started down backwards. COMPLIMENTS OF MACLIN MOTORS LTD. FORD and MERCURY Sales and Service 77

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QUICK ONES The only difference between a rut and a grave is in their dimensions.—Ellen Glasgow. A man is getting old when he walks around a puddle instead of through it.—R. C. Ferguson. In the war against reality man has but one weapon—Imagina¬ tion.—Jules de Gautier. History teaches this—that people and governments have never learned anything from history.—Hegel. In the egg the hen was away ahead of everybody on stream¬ lining.—H. I. Phillips. No money talks louder than hush money when it gets its voice back.—Arkansas Gazette. Here lies an Atheist: all dressed up and no place to go.—Lyre. One pair of chiffon hose is produced by 333 silkworms. And another worm works eight hours a day for the wherewithal to pur¬ chase the hose.—Dallas News. A man mounting a street car with 10 children let them all sit down and he stood up. An elderly woman in the corner began to laugh. Are you laughing at me?” asked the gentleman. Yes, was the reply. “I can’t help laughing at how you kidded yourself out of a seat.” I Hello, is this the Humane Society?” Yes.” “Well, there’s a book salesman sitting in a tree teasing my dog.” 79